Attending A&E when no one to look after child after school

Hope you are ok op

How are you feeling OP? 🩷

You poor thing, @worrierd. I lot of people just don’t get how you can’t easily leave a high needs kid. It sounds as if the both of you have had a hell of a time. When you’re feeling better, it might be helpful to talk to the senco as they may have some advice on local service etc that they can sign post you to in terms of making a future plan. Sending love to you and your boy.

I hope you're ok OP. Glad you found a solution for this time. If there's a next time its ok to take your son with you. I've been in that position before, a lone parent with nobody I could ask to help, and had to go to hospital with toddler DD in tow and it was fine.

Sorry you've been ripped apart on here by idiots OP, hope you are ok.
You were absolutely right to go to A and E.
Once things have settled, have a think about referring yourself to social services. They will be able to help you with emergency support. Even if it's just signposting you to the right places.
My friend is an emergency foster carer and she sometimes gets referrals for school pick ups.

Fingers crossed for you OP, it can be very scary going through these things alone. Ignore the naysayers. My chest pain turned out to be a pulmonary embolism, so you should never ever ignore it - particularly if it's some aggy/judgy posters on MN who just want to have a go about how they have childcare and you don't! Women all too often ignore pains because the don't want to cause a fuss and it can be fatal. You did the right thing going.

I hope you don't have to worry about it in future but it's definitely worth asking the school to see if they have someone like the poster up-thread who is a trusted person for emergencies. I'd also have a think on doing a Will, mainly so you can appoint someone to look after DC should the worst happen. Even a letter of wishes if you can't afford a full Will service right now would probably be a good thing to do. Not saying you're dying, obviously, but just so you've covered that while it's on your mind so there's no confusion should the worst happen. Good luck with it all.

Just collect him next time and go from there straight to the hospital, he is in school not jail

Dont think police do baby sitting

She did, if you read her updates she says so. She wasn't looking for advice on whether to go to a&e. She was posting about her childcare situation.

I hope you get seen fairly quickly and all is ok.

I was in and out of a&e and the doctor’s with chest pain. Mine was the menopause along with low iron and exacerbated by health anxiety caused by sudden death in family. However, one doctor told me that we should always go in with chest pain as you never know. Better to get it checked and be ok than not…

Maybe have a chat with your daughter and sort out a plan.

What a lovely plan…

I'd ask school to taxi him home and you pay your end and then leave him home with some movies till sister gets in

In which case she phones 999 and the police can deal with her dc!

I’ve been in a similar situation and had to go to a&e with what turned out to be pneumonia. I had to take my 4 with me and say I couldn’t be admitted

11 will always say A&E for chest pain, but so many peole on MN think they know better.

Good luck @worrierd not surprised you are being sent to A+E.

This is literally the worst place I have ever experienced for A+E advice. I am convinced that as a prerequisite to join the site all MN must have had to have at least one seriously long wait in A+E and have taken a vow to reduce the A+E numbers at all costs now and just see the odd death from poor MN advice as collateral damage.

Yes this is true, I see your point but on the other side of the coin it could cause her to make the decision to use up NHS time when it’s not needed. Really the OP should’ve just phoned 111 straight away or her GP etc.. rather than asking on Mumsnet.

Best to keep personal opinions out of it if you dont actually have any medical training. Posts like yours can cause harm if an OP is constantly told that tbey should not waste A&E resources. It may stop someone seeking help when they need it.

I have had to go to A&E with my kids when an emergency and no choice

No, only an awful lot of personal experience. I may well be proved wrong but I’ve been to a&e with chest pain several times even had ambulances when my anxiety was at its worst, only to get there and have a normal ECG and wait about 10 hours. I always have an inverted t wave too which if she has something like that could cause unnecessary anxiety even though it can be caused by anxiety itself.

but yes I was maybe wrong to say that as the blanket rule is chest pain = a&e

How is worsening chest pain not am emergency? The one thing that they always recommend going to A&E for is chest pain.

Are you saying that because she is under the cardiac team she shouldn't go to A & E with worsening chest pain? Thats not a very well thought out idea.

Take care @worrierd I hope it’s just a false alarm and that you’re seen quickly. <<hugs>>

As other posters have said, when you’re home again, start making a plan to increase your social circle.

When you’re collecting DS from school try and talk to other parents and ask if there’s a class WhatsApp group and join it.

You only need a couple of friends who will help you out in an emergency so try not to feel overwhelmed by the task.

I’m autistic too but I’m good at making friends as I’ll start up a conversation with anyone and I’m both direct and very thick skinned.

A few years ago one of the single parent mums who I hardly knew asked if I’d look after her dog for a week so she could go on holiday and I agreed. (It was a nightmare dog as it wasn’t well trained and even her own brother who also has a child at the school refused to have it. 😂)

The great thing is that there are other people like me out there who will happily help other mums out in an emergency. You just need to find them.

Don't talk nonsense. It is perfectly possible to be completed lucid and able to carry out normal tasks while having a cardiac event. Particularly so for women. Someone I know worked a 10 hour shift with some discomfort, think she had a pulled muscle. She was actually having a heart attack.