New DP useless around the house

I would put him back out.

He ecan piss where he likes then OP and theres not much you can do about it

He's learning that his gf doesn't want to sit in his piss or clear it up for him? That's not a complex process that's a 'tell him once' thing.

I think it's a last time sitting him down and tell him you're not the 'house manager' and you don't expect to be telling him what needs doing and when. You will tell him all the things you do around the house, once. You will show him, once. If he wants to have a rough split of responsibilities that take equal time, ok (although if one of you is ill or very busy with work or something or away, or things change (eg you buy a hoover that moves about by itself) the other one should automatically pick up the slack, not have a 'thats not my job' attitude. But if he is expecting more direction, reminders, negotiations, nagging, exemptions because he cba, or you to 'point out' things he doesn't see, or loads of time to 'learn' things that children can work out for yourselves, then the lack of respect and the resentment will ultimately kill your relationship so you may as well split now.

Either that or I'd tell him you're 'learning'what works best to clean up adults piss, and you've experimented with his clothes he's left lying around / his pillow

We're all desperately hoping you haven't let this guy have a financial stake in your home, OP 🤞

Yuck. What a barely formed adult. I have adult sons, younger than this. They don’t piss like it’s a urinal, they sit down. They stand to piss at urinals.

They cook, they clean, they are domesticated fully fledged adults.

Set your bar higher than the floor and throw this one back.

Oh come on, he doesn't need to "learn" how not to pee on a seat, he's been toilet trained since he was a child! What he means is he can't be arsed either putting the seat up or cleaning up after himself, as you will do that!

Play him sabrina carpenters latest

You point stuff out every single time. If he doesnt get it within the month he needs to go back to his mum

When you say he had ‘brought into the house’ do you mean ‘bought in’? Has he paid to be part owner? God I hope not

It's also deeply depressing that you have friends who think that sex in exchange for basic house cleaning is a thing.

Dump him? Honestly I have three sons. Two have SEN and go to a specialist school. They have learnt how to not piss on the seat.

Because their parents pulled them up on it.

A life time of either his parents ignoring it or moaning hasn't taught him basic life skills. But being dumped for Piddington on the floor might teach him some lesson

You need to march him to his mess like a child and insist he clear it up while you wait outside. Every. Single. Fucking. Time.

I swear to God the older I get I cannot believe that intelligent women put up with this shite from men. He’s not ‘learning’. He thinks it’s beneath him and it’s a woman’s job to clear up his bodily fluids. Wake up op.

Jeeeeez; no, don't use sex as a way to bribe your BF to not piss on your floor.

Tell him what you expect from him and tell them if he is unable to comply then he needs to move back out. Set a time limit and kick him out if he is not able to meet the minimum standards for co-habiting.

I felt exactly the same when I read that. Why has he bought into your house??

A 28 year old man who has presumably pissed all over his parents toilet and expected presumably his mum to clear it up?

How on earth can you find him attractive? Bleurgh.

What do you mean he has brought into the house? That made my blood run cold. Do you mean he is now on the mortgage?

And he's suddenly developed aiming problems?? come on op. he needs to move right back out

Do you mean you let him buy into your house? Oh OP, take legal advice and established if you can afford to buy him back out before you dump him I guess, or if you'll need to sell the house.

Pack his bags, take him back to Mummy and explain you’d like a refund or replacement as this one is faulty.

Now he has brought into the house

Do you mean he has bought into the house as in he has a financial interest in it? If so it will be harder to extricate yourself from this unsatisfactory set up. Or do you mean he's named on the tenancy? If he's just really your lodger he can go as soon as you want him to.
You need to sit down and discuss all the household chores and admin load. What has he ever contributed to before, what is he prepared to do now (don't accept less than 50%) and exactly why should it take him longer than 5 minutes to learn how to behave/clean etc? Look up strategic incompetence!

I’d be really frank and say an inability to aim in the toilet correctly and do basic adult chores is deeply unattractive in a 28 year old man. It’s then on him to make a choice as to whether he grows up or not. You’re not his mum. If he chooses not to grow up, you can make a choice too. Imagine how life will be if you have 2 kids and he’s still not remembering he needs to aim…
If you have to negotiate such baseline stuff, navigating anything even remotely challenging together seems pretty impossible.

I couldn’t be with someone who pees all over the place.

i think i would tell him that there’s no more ‘learning’ or forgetting, I’d agree on some kind of labour split. He does kitchen, you do laundry etc and if he’s not doing his agreed jobs from now on then he needs to leave. You DO NOT want a long term relationship and family with someone who is already treating you like his mummy

Weaponised incompetence

Tell him it's not working out and he needs to move out.

If he goes without a fight, he's not that into you.

If he really cares he will sort himself out.

OMG how old is he? 10???

Chuck him back.

Or start to do only things for yourself. Don’t do his washing or ironing. Don’t shop for him. Don’t cook for him.

If he pees on the lavatory seat give him a bucket until he takes responsibility.

But honestly, he’s clearly not an adult in any reasonable way.