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Original poster

Children having their own seat on a packed train.

885 replies

user1493559472 · 11/09/2025 09:59

I am on a packed train. A child who is about 3 years old is sat in their own seat and not on the parents lap, would you ask to sit down and the child sits on parents lap? People were standing.
Thank you

OP posts:
MrsSkylerWhite · 11/09/2025 10:31

Jumpingthruhoops · 11/09/2025 10:28

Maybe because they've paid for one and the 3-year-old hasn't?

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How do you know. We always paid for our kids and booked seats on long journeys. People keep mentioning commuter trains. OP didn’t say that, she just said packed.

Luxio · 11/09/2025 10:30

Jumpingthruhoops · 11/09/2025 10:28

Maybe because they've paid for one and the 3-year-old hasn't?

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How do you know they've not paid for a ticket though? If I'm travelling on a long train journey I know is going to be busy then I would buy a ticket and reserve seats because then they would be guaranteed to get their own seat. Just because they are under 5 doesn't mean they don't have a ticket.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 10:30

Jumpingthruhoops · 11/09/2025 10:27

The official line is that a 3-year-old would usually travel free, but this won't entitle them to a seat - they'd need to be moved to the parent's lap should the train get busy.

For the parent to guarantee a seat for their child, they would need to purchase a standard child ticket.

A ticket doesn't guarantee a seat, unless you also have a reservation. 🤪

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 10:29

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:25

Your choice to have children. Why should others stand just so you don't have to be inconvenienced?

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Your choice to get on a train too though.....if we're making silly points. 😆

Jumpingthruhoops · 11/09/2025 10:28

blondebombsite13 · 11/09/2025 10:20

No, I wouldn’t.

What’s your reasoning for thinking you are more deserving of the seat?

Maybe because they've paid for one and the 3-year-old hasn't?

MrsSkylerWhite · 11/09/2025 10:28

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:25

Your choice to have children. Why should others stand just so you don't have to be inconvenienced?

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Good grief. No wonder more and more people are deciding not to have kids if this is how people consider them.

I wonder if they’ll still be an inconvenience when those people are elderly and possibly relying on them for care.

I find lots of adults an inconvenience. Kids, not so much.

Luxio · 11/09/2025 10:27

Some people on this thread really don't seem to like children.

Jumpingthruhoops · 11/09/2025 10:27

The official line is that a 3-year-old would usually travel free, but this won't entitle them to a seat - they'd need to be moved to the parent's lap should the train get busy.

For the parent to guarantee a seat for their child, they would need to purchase a standard child ticket.

HoLeeFuk · 11/09/2025 10:27

I often give up my seat for small children if I’m on a packed tube.

So many MNers say this but in 33 years of living in London and using all forms of public transport, I've never once seen an adult stand for a child.

BananaPeels · 11/09/2025 10:26

weareallcats · 11/09/2025 10:17

I don’t think small children should give up seats for able bodied adults. In fact I would expect my teenagers to give up their seat for a small child on the tube, etc - obviously I would too.

I often give up my seat for small children if I’m on a packed tube. It is much more dangerous for someone small to be standing and holding on that seated. I’m amazed many people hold on to the assertion that small children must give up their seats for able bodied adults.

that said, I would most likely have put my 3 year old on my lap in the OP’s situation but it depends if they would have played ball. Mine could be very wriggly and it could have caused more problems trying to hang on to them rather than have them sit quietly in a seat.

nomas · 11/09/2025 10:26

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:24

Agree. Times really seem to have changed. Yes toddlers are human too, and yes it's not always practical to have a 3 year old on your lap as a pp pointed out, but at one time it was standard for very young/small children to sit on their parent's lap if a bus or train was packed. It's just basic consideration for other passengers imo.

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It’s not children’s fault they can’t pay for train tickets. Sitting on a lap for an extended period of time isn’t comfortable.

ICanBuyMyselfFlowers25 · 11/09/2025 10:25

No. And I wouldn't of someone asked either. My children have as much right to sit down as anyone else. I wouldn't even mind paying if I had to.

K0OLA1D · 11/09/2025 10:25

I'd have to ask someone to stand or in this case sit on someone's lap as I couldn't stand on a train.

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:25

SJM1988 · 11/09/2025 10:24

No, having a 3 year old sat on your lap for a length of time is uncomfortable. Esp if squeezed into train (or bus seats).

Your choice to have children. Why should others stand just so you don't have to be inconvenienced?

MrsSkylerWhite · 11/09/2025 10:25

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:24

Agree. Times really seem to have changed. Yes toddlers are human too, and yes it's not always practical to have a 3 year old on your lap as a pp pointed out, but at one time it was standard for very young/small children to sit on their parent's lap if a bus or train was packed. It's just basic consideration for other passengers imo.

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Is the child not also a passenger?

MrsSkylerWhite · 11/09/2025 10:24

Overwhelmedandunderfed · 11/09/2025 10:23

I would have pulled my child into my lap at that age and offered the seat to someone but I don’t think it’s reasonable to ask. Lots of people would struggle to have a child on their knee for various reasons. Just call them a cunt in your head and reframe your thinking so it’s doesn't drive you mad.

A cunt? Seriously? For all you know, they may have paid for that child’s seat.

Why are you any more deserving?

MyElatedUmberFinch · 11/09/2025 10:24

Only if you are elderly, disabled or pregnant.

SJM1988 · 11/09/2025 10:24

No, having a 3 year old sat on your lap for a length of time is uncomfortable. Esp if squeezed into train (or bus seats).

AgentPidge · 11/09/2025 10:24

The thing is, if you asked the parent to have the kid on their lap and they reluctantly complied, you'd find yourself sitting next to a wriggly kid who's kicking you every five minutes. I'd rather stand!
Was it at a table seat? I'm not sure if it's possible to have a three yr old on your lap at one of those.

underthecokesign · 11/09/2025 10:24

MellowPinkDeer · 11/09/2025 10:02

In commuter time I’d be asking them to sit on a lap. They are riding for free and others pay thousands a year, it’s really inconsiderate I think.

edited to add I think the parent is very inconsiderate- not the small child!

Edited

Agree. Times really seem to have changed. Yes toddlers are human too, and yes it's not always practical to have a 3 year old on your lap as a pp pointed out, but at one time it was standard for very young/small children to sit on their parent's lap if a bus or train was packed. It's just basic consideration for other passengers imo.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 10:24

user1493559472 · 11/09/2025 09:59

I am on a packed train. A child who is about 3 years old is sat in their own seat and not on the parents lap, would you ask to sit down and the child sits on parents lap? People were standing.
Thank you

No, of course not.

HoLeeFuk · 11/09/2025 10:23

I wouldn't ask because if the parent hasn't done it already, they're not the kind of person that would be receptive to that.

nomas · 11/09/2025 10:23

I wouldn’t get up so a 3yo has their own seat but I wouldn’t ask for a 3yo’s seat either. Every person deserves respect, including children.

Overwhelmedandunderfed · 11/09/2025 10:23

I would have pulled my child into my lap at that age and offered the seat to someone but I don’t think it’s reasonable to ask. Lots of people would struggle to have a child on their knee for various reasons. Just call them a cunt in your head and reframe your thinking so it’s doesn't drive you mad.

Catpolitics · 11/09/2025 10:22

Absolutely not! My kid would get a seat over me - they can’t stand on a moving train and my little one has probably walked and needs it. If someone was disabled/ had needs etc then I would rethink but over an able adult like myself - nope 🙂‍↔️ child can have the seat