Children having their own seat on a packed train.

But is it acceptable to judge others who don’t do the same when you have no idea about why the parent in question doesn’t want to give up the seat? Or is it a case that a 3 year old needs to give it up regardless?

Can you read?

I am not dictating what anyone should do. I am telling you what I would do and have done.

You directly contrasted an overtired upset child with a well behaved child, clearly implying an overtired upset child is badly behaved.

My experience with my three children (all well over three years old now)

So you are not the parent in that situation, you are dictating what you think the parent should do so you can get the seat you are after.

And?
Small children are also people, equally valuable people.

Pretty much every post you've written has suggested this.

And where in that post do I say children are less important than adults?

It's not the same, no. It's a bit less comfortable. But three year olds are... small children.

Again, I don't think you have a grasp of what you are talking about here.

I am not the stranger in this scenario. I am the three year olds' parent. I am not demanding the three year olds seat. I am offering to sacrifice some of my comfort - and instructing my 3 year old to sacrifice a little of their comfort - to help a stranger in need

This is your caveat: "with a high risk of an upset child making their discomfort known plus another person sitting next to them likely getting kicked as the three-year old wriggles."

This is not inevitable.

The fact you think a tired upset three year old is ‘badly behaved’ says it all,

You said that, not me. My experience with my three children (all well over three years old now) is not what you described.

I'm not making this about age!

The whole thread is about three year olds! Someone else started talking about five year olds.

Of course, all children are different but three year olds are mostly smaller than five year olds!

It's absurd to make this about age.

Some 5 year olds are the size of 3 year olds and vice versa

Also TBH for me the age thing goes the other way entirely - once my younger one turned 5, he was able to read by himself and to understand the need to budge up on a train. At 3, he wasn't. As he was a relatively large 3 year old and I don't have the arms of Mr Tickle, I would have had to stop reading to him on the train journeys to have him on my lap and he would not have been old enough to understand why a random able bodied person was important enough to disrupt that

Yes, five year olds are. But I have constantly been referencing three year olds.

so you wouldn’t move your 4 year old? selfless modelling of behaviour only goes until the age of 4?

Yes, five year olds are. But I have constantly been referencing three year olds.

That children are less important than adults, as stated already.

but many 5 year olds are pretty big and heavy and hard to have on a lap for several hours

also there are people on this thread who think any child of any age should be made to get up and offer their seat to an able bodied adult.

But if your child gets fractious and squirms like mine would have done and potentially starts crying - that isn’t increasing the comfort of the train is it?

I would absolutely have moved my child for a cuddle if I thought it was conducive to everyone being comfortable. If I thought my child would be far more uncomfortable by moving them and would be very difficult for me on a packed train then I wouldn’t. I’m not going to martyr myself for other people. I would be really angry with a parent who moved their child and that child started crying because of it and distuebed everyone else.

Not very often.

Why is this a journey of one hour plus?

It's not the same, no. It's a bit less comfortable. But three year olds are... small children.

I think I’m putting forward a realistic scenario based on my experience of journeys with small kids on trains (both mine and friends/families).
Just out of curiosity how often did you travel on journeys of say 1 hour plus with your kids on public transport when they were toddlers?

Two people sitting in one seat isn't remotely close to two people actually each having a seat.

I agree it will depend.

But you are only putting forward the pessimistic scenario.

It could well turn out that a tired three year old falls asleep and the two adults sit comfortably.

Also, the seated adult who have had to stand feels reassured that not everyone else in the world is behaving selfishly and only looking out for themselves.

It would be selfless, but it wouldn't improve the average comfort on the train carriage.

Instead of them standing and me sitting, I would be standing and they would be sitting. No change.

In my scenario, all three of us are sitting. In my experience, this is not a major sacrifice for me or my three year old (we may be a little less comfortable, although the benefit is we can also have a cuddle).