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Original poster

Children having their own seat on a packed train.

885 replies

user1493559472 · 11/09/2025 09:59

I am on a packed train. A child who is about 3 years old is sat in their own seat and not on the parents lap, would you ask to sit down and the child sits on parents lap? People were standing.
Thank you

OP posts:
GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:31

NamelessNancy · 11/09/2025 16:29

Better for a young child to be seated than standing as more likely to fall and harder for adults to see. However purely as a numbers thing if at all possible they should go on a parent's knee to free up an extra seat and have less crush in the standing space. Fair enough if the parent can't but I do think its selfish not to let an additional person sit if they can share one seat with their child.

It's unsafe, regardless of what some of the entitled folk on here think.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:30

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:28

Well no it doesn't help. Your opinion doesn't trump the rules.

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It's not an opinion that it's unsafe though, it's factual.
The safety of a small child, and their parent, isn't less than that of an able bodied adult. I'm sorry you seem to have been brought up in a world where children didn't matter.

Wherehasthecatgone · 11/09/2025 16:29

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:27

Yes, they are still small, which is why they can sit on parents' laps.

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Do you think they can sit on laps in cars too? They did in the 70s

NamelessNancy · 11/09/2025 16:29

Better for a young child to be seated than standing as more likely to fall and harder for adults to see. However purely as a numbers thing if at all possible they should go on a parent's knee to free up an extra seat and have less crush in the standing space. Fair enough if the parent can't but I do think its selfish not to let an additional person sit if they can share one seat with their child.

Wherehasthecatgone · 11/09/2025 16:29

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:22

How 'nope' if it's National Rail's rules (as well as being common sense)?

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National Rail don’t have any trains.

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:28

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:23

Unsafe practices are not 'common sense'.
It's an ancient rule that nobody has bothered to update, and is completely unsafe.
HTH

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Well no it doesn't help. Your opinion doesn't trump the rules.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:28

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:27

Yes, they are still small, which is why they can sit on parents' laps.

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No they cannot. Stop just parroting incorrect information. Adults can stand much more easily than two people can share one chair!

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:27

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:22

How 'nope' if it's National Rail's rules (as well as being common sense)?

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Have you ignored the 3 replies addressing this?

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:27

Wherehasthecatgone · 11/09/2025 16:25

All those who think three year olds are just small adults, most three year olds still need a nap in the afternoon, generally of at least an hour. Those that don’t still need quiet time to rest. A significant proportion are still in nappies. Most talk in 3 to 4 word sentences. If separated from their parents they won’t be able to give their address. Their bones are still forming in their hands and their feet.

Yes, they are still small, which is why they can sit on parents' laps.

Wherehasthecatgone · 11/09/2025 16:26

ParmaVioletTea · 11/09/2025 16:23

I wouldn’t ask but I would judge. It’s very selfish. A child of 3 can sit on a parent’s lap when there are adults standing.

But this is MN so you’ll be shouted down!

It is very selfish to expect two individuals to be uncomfortable for your benefit.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:26

ParmaVioletTea · 11/09/2025 16:23

I wouldn’t ask but I would judge. It’s very selfish. A child of 3 can sit on a parent’s lap when there are adults standing.

But this is MN so you’ll be shouted down!

I mean I might judge someone who thinks they can judge a complete stranger's situation so well.......

Wherehasthecatgone · 11/09/2025 16:25

All those who think three year olds are just small adults, most three year olds still need a nap in the afternoon, generally of at least an hour. Those that don’t still need quiet time to rest. A significant proportion are still in nappies. Most talk in 3 to 4 word sentences. If separated from their parents they won’t be able to give their address. Their bones are still forming in their hands and their feet.

PeloMom · 11/09/2025 16:24

Nope. My child has always gotten own seat- it’s too heavy for me to have on lap even at 3yr old. I normally stand. A 3 yr old needs a seat more than an able bodied person.

ParmaVioletTea · 11/09/2025 16:23

I wouldn’t ask but I would judge. It’s very selfish. A child of 3 can sit on a parent’s lap when there are adults standing.

But this is MN so you’ll be shouted down!

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:23

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:22

How 'nope' if it's National Rail's rules (as well as being common sense)?

Show quote history

Unsafe practices are not 'common sense'.
It's an ancient rule that nobody has bothered to update, and is completely unsafe.
HTH

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:22

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:21

But in this case somewhere else for them to sit - parent's lap.

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Again, there isn't.
Never mind it being uncomfortable, it's completely unsafe.

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:22

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:21

Nope.

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How 'nope' if it's National Rail's rules (as well as being common sense)?

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:22

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:18

She's not asking for the small child to stand. She noted that in her OP. She thinks the small child should be in parent's lap.

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It's not safe for a child to sit on a parent's lap in a moving vehicle, never mind uncomfortable.

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:21

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:20

If a child is already in the seat, and there isn't anywhere else for them to sit or safely stand, then only a rude or entitled person would demand they move.

Edited
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But in this case somewhere else for them to sit - parent's lap.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:21

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:20

There we go. Case closed. OP is right.

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Nope.

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:20

LegoPicnic · 11/09/2025 16:19

Yes, for some reason people keep ignoring that, Probably because it doesn’t suit their narrative,

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There we go. Case closed. OP is right.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:20

LegoPicnic · 11/09/2025 16:19

Yes, for some reason people keep ignoring that, Probably because it doesn’t suit their narrative,

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If a child is already in the seat, and there isn't anywhere else for them to sit or safely stand, then only a rude or entitled person would demand they move.

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:19

Iamuhtredsonofuhtred · 11/09/2025 16:18

I remember a woman having a go at me when I was heavily pregnant for this reason- the bus was full and they were standing and my 3 year old was seated next to me. I explained that I was pregnant and couldn’t hold her on my lap (I also had severe PGP but why should I need to explain that to an angry stranger?) and she started arguing about how many kids she’d had etc etc…I noticed that she didn’t pick any of the young men on the bus to have a go at for not giving up their seat, some people just like an easy target. So no, I wouldn’t ask someone to move their child so I could sit down. Children are people too and you don’t know their circumstances. Sorry you had to stand, it’s annoying but it happens if transport is busy.

Exactly, why are these entitled folk picking on children?

LegoPicnic · 11/09/2025 16:19

BIossomtoes · 11/09/2025 15:05

National Rail says:

Children under 5
Children under 5 years of age travel for free on most journeys but check with your train company to make sure. Please note, children under 5 who are travelling without a ticket may only occupy a seat that is not required by a fare-paying passenger.

If you haven’t paid for a ticket for your child a fare paying adult is entitled to the seat.

Yes, for some reason people keep ignoring that, Probably because it doesn’t suit their narrative,

GleisZwei · 11/09/2025 16:18

Gwenhwyfar · 11/09/2025 16:16

"Your ticket doesn’t entitle you to a seat."

It does if one is available, which it would be if the parent put the child on their lap.

The seat is also be available to the child, who got there first and possibly needs it more. HTH

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