Teacher told my child that child is not a Muslim

Like the ones who knew it never happened?

I'm the same. One of my earliest memories is being in my father's arms at a crowded Mass. I was born on a Tuesday and I was at Mass with him five days later. I certainly knew I was a Catholic by the time I started school.

Just wanted to add that at that Mass when I was five days old the priest offered to Baptise me at the end of Mass. My grandparents attended the same church so they were also my godparents.

OP, well done for keeping your cool.
That must have been difficult.

And I bet there's some red cheeks on this thread now 😉

The teacher has admitted she said it.

A misunderstanding I'm sure. As a 4 year old I insisted my school friend had grey hair. Despite my mum saying it was blonde I was sure it was grey.

@Jkam24 I would be reporting this to the Head, clearly some members of staff need reminding that their personal views should be left outside the classroom.

I was sorry to hear that OP, it's quite shocking!

I understand about your concern about not wanting to escalate the problem.

It's all a bit weird, not sure what is the right thing to do?

Your clever little girl was right though

@Jkam24 - I can appreciate that as a fellow teacher you do not want to get the teacher into trouble, but I think by reporting it to the head, in a non-complaint way, you will actually be doing her a favour.

If she says something similar to a Jewish or Sikh child, it could land her in some serious trouble (I am assuming that someone with the naivity to say what she did probably doesn't have a grip on the subtleties and differences between religious and ethnoreligious).

Also, if she were to say it to another Muslim or Christian (or any other religion) child whose parents were not as understanding as you, she could end up with a facing some serious consequences and potential abuse!

***

On a separate note, I am astounded at the number of people who were telling you not to even bother going to have the conversation.

I was a little older (about 7) when we moved house from a town to a small village with a one form entry, small class school. We moved onto a housing association estate the house came with my dad's new job as a caretaker. My parents got a local decorator in to do some work and he happened to be the husband of my new teacher.

I was quite excited by this and the next day at school said to the teacher "Your husband is decorating my house" in front of the rest of the class.

She apparently took great offence at this and loudly called me a liar in front of everyone, claiming that her husband was working away. As a punishment I was made to sit in the corner.

Naturally this upset me a lot and I of course told my mom as soon as I got home who immediately went down the school to confirm what had been said and have words with the teacher - I can't recall the outcome, but it turned out that this teacher was basically a snob who looked down on anyone who lived on the estate and thought they were all stupid. I was an advanced reader when I moved schools and was already a free reader, but again, I wasn't believed and she put me back down to Village with three corners books, because she didn't think anyone who lived on the estate could possibly be a free reader at 7. After yet another complaint from my mom, she left me alone - never let me join the choir or any extra-curricular activities she ran though!

I dread to think how horrendous my time at that school would have been if my mom had done what many here were advising the op to do and ignore the concerns.

That teacher never changed - there was an incident a few years later when a young lad from the estate, whose dad had died very suddenly, was taken to school by his nan. He was, understandably, very clingy to her, and the same teacher made some vile comments to him about being a baby!

If she cares about her career she will have to reflect on it.

Caring about children is already established by saying it, but humanity is still too primitive for that with religion still existing at all.

It didn't take away my choice. I was baptised, made my first communion, confession, confirmation. I no longer practice, but I still have the values it taught me - treat other people the way you want to be treated. Disagreed with most of it, but it gave me a moral compass which I am grateful for.

I did at that age. I was raised as a Catholic, so we went to chapel every week, So I did actually have a concept of it.

It makes no sense for a teacher to attempt that kind of philosophical debate with a 4/5 year old. I think the head teacher needs to be made aware at least so they know this teacher is unwittingly upsetting children by bringing her personal beliefs into the classroom, because that's not her role. Being Moslem (using your spelling I think, OP, apologies if that's incorrect) is important to your family and she's part of it. I have to say, I was surprised that it wasn't a misunderstanding, having worked with kids and also having a kid who some think is advanced (he has pretty asynchronous development so he talks the talk but really struggled at that age with lessons about the world wars for example, other children were fine with them - he is autistic, he couldn't understand why soldiers would be considered heroes because they killed people). However, we also had a TA who didn't believe in autism, and she made his life a misery. We took him out in the end. These individuals really do have a negative impact.

People can't comment on something that happened at school until you seek clarification on whether it happened, so it's a difficult one to address until that's confirmed. I think that's probably where most of the infuriated responses have come from.

The concept of whether children can consent to being part of a religion is separate to this issue. Currently your child is being raised in a Moslem household, and expecting her to somehow have an opinion on the ethics of that or a concept of how to opt out of it is deeply unfair, and ridiculous honestly. The teacher needs to be given a talking to by the head, because she's causing unnecessary upset. I've worked with Muslim families and their disabled children and they absolutely have a say in their child's religious beliefs, it's a part of respecting the child and caring for them when the parents aren't there. It's what they know, it's what their parents believe. The notion that the teacher thinks they know better is a big problem for me, and I'm pretty bloody atheist. If it were the other way around - a teacher telling an atheist kid they were part of a religion - there would be a serious outcry.

OP must be incredibly busy at the start of term.

Your posts don't make sense.
You say DD "wasn't aware she understood the concept of religion / being Muslim" but you also say your daughter cried when told "she wasn't Muslim". Why would your daughter cry about this if she doesn't even realise she's Muslim and how are you so annoyed by this when you haven't even told your daughter that she's Muslim.
Bright verbal pupils in reception are usually very proud, eager and able to share their religions, talk about places of worship, celebrations ect

can I ask where you read that?

😂we need the laughing button back!

according to the OP, she has spoken to the teacher and she did say it.

Nah a teacher wouldn’t dare to say this. It’s too much of a hot potato …

Which is weird when you think about it.
Maybe it is a time to get rid of baptising infants, or at least calling it provisionally catholic or something.

I've read about adults (baptised as babies) wanting to be crossed from the Catholic's list and the church being petty and obstructional about it.

While many children will grow into the religious beliefs of their parents, everyone has the right to choose for themselves when they have capacity and officially introducing them as Catholic or Muslim from babies is taking away part of the choice.

I tend to believe OPs on here and not make stuff up in my head. The OP IS a teacher btw, which you would know if you had rtf.

Some people subscribe to a view where people should only have a religion 'when they're an adult and can understand it' and it's wrong to 'push religion on children', which displays a misunderstanding of how religion can be applied to my mind. I think there's this assumption that being of a religion means telling a child what to believe. But religion isn't like that for everyone, for other people it's more cultural, and you can't bring your child up without it being in the religion, and the religion may involve learning practices or even language skills, so you can't 'just wait'until a child is old enough to make a choice. Obviously, kids should have a choice to follow your religion or not, certainly when they're 12+.

I think this is a rather bad move on the part of the teacher. She's entitled to think what she likes but expressing this opinion won't be in line with school policy, I'm sure.

Obliviously what you choose to do next is up to you, but if you are escalating, it's probably worth making sure you do so according to the letter of the school complaints policy (I'm sure you're aware of this already, I'm just 'putting it out there' for anyone following).
As an ex-School governor I'd have wanted to know that this was happening in my school.

A 4 year old is interested in religion and has and has any concept of it?
I don't think so.

Not sure you read the person's note - they don't agree with children claiming it's haram not to hold hands.

That clearly isn't right, is it, and needs to be challenged. Otherwise you're basically agreeing with segregation based on religion.

I'm so sorry - I'd be upset if my child's teacher told her that something fairly fundamental about herself was untrue.
My daughter's school is really multicultural and they celebrate it. (Mine is funny -she used to come home asking if we could be Muslim because they had a community iftar at school and she loved it so much... then weeks later, would I consider being Sikh as diwali was "like so cool"!)

But I think you're within your rights to wonder what else this teacher might say that you don't agree with.