Would you leave someone who..

That's compatibility. You're both happy with the situation. Me & BF have sex far far more often than that and we're both happy with it (because we are well matched, sex is a priority and a hobby for us). Neither of us would be with someone with much lower sex drive.
The difference is not a problem but the sulking and his reaction to it is, OP. So on that basis alone, time to end it.

There’s two ways this pans out OP. Either you have sex you don’t want, or he’s sulking and arguing with you several times a week for saying no.

Both are forms of abuse. End it.

But ultimately either one will be having too much sex and one will now be having enough. One or both will.be miserable. No amount of counselling will deal with that

These two just aren't meant to be together.

Nope

It sounds like couples counselling would be a good shout here. It’s ok to have different sex drives however it’s not ok for one to make the other feel bad for theirs.

Counselling with give you both the tools to think about the situation from each others point of view and also learn how to communicate about the topic and retrain your brains as to how to think about sex together.

Its not the sex drive. Its the fact he feels entitled to it and makes you feel under pressure.
Its a quick way to disconnect a woman from her own sexuality if you feel you have to perform

It won't change. His biological 'requirements' are pretty much constant. The one thing that might change is your libido will likely drop with age.

we don’t live together

I find this staggering. Don't live together. No shared kids.There's no impediment to a quick WhatsApp Message right now: "Sorry, it's been great but we're not compatible. I wish you the best, we should return each other's stuff next week. X".

The OP might as well say "I hit my hand with a hammer every day at 3pm. Should I stop?" Yes! Of course you should!

If this was a marriage with shared property and two shared young kids it would be a nightmare, but it's not.

Why would you even consider staying in a relationship that has any element to it that ‘fills you with dread’? You’re not sexually compatible, and his reaction to rejection is sulky and brattish; of course this isn’t going to work longer term.

*its always been about 4-5 x pw, various times, which I enjoy but then he feels it’s never enough."

we do have words at the time when I say no and it ruins the time.

You will never have enough sex for him. And he feels entitled enough to use your body how he pleases to argue about you saying no. That's the deal killer right there, his entitlement and he basically doesn't believe you have body autonomy.

Don't count on his sex drive decreasing with age either.

This may be a glib comment but it hits home. You are literally a wank sock - he’s probably thinking about a random girl at Tescos checkout while he’s doing it, or the latest porn video he watched the night before (or that afternoon…).

Oh god, you should not have to put up with that!
A friend of mine has just left her H of 30 years for the same reason. She just can’t cope anymore. She kept thinking his sex drive would diminished with age but it hasn’t and she doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life worrying about him sulking because his sex drive is a lot higher than hers.

You’re not sexually compatible and he’s not emotionally mature enough to either a) compromise on the balance of an otherwise excellent relationship and b) regulate his emotions like an adult.

Bad news all round.

Sulks if doesnt get sex? 🚩🚩🚩

I would not stay with a sulker or anyone that felt entitled to my body on their schedule.

I can’t stand sulking. You are filled with dread when you think of the future with him. You know you can’t stay with him and be happy.

In these situations is a wank not sufficient?! I’ve never understood it! Me and DH have sex maybe 1-2 times per week and are late 30’s! I’m just not in the mood for more than that and he isn’t bothered either he said. He also doesn’t wank so assume he doesn’t have a high sex drive. Not one of those women who says he doesn’t wank because I’m naive, genuinely I’ve asked him and he said he just doesn’t feel the need nor have the time!

We’re late 40’s and the thought of another few decades of this fills me with dread.

This alone does not bode well for the future.

We’re late 40’s and the thought of another few decades of this fills me with dread.

Yes.

Would I be with someone who doesn’t know what “no” means?
Avsolutely not.

You might as well. Because one or the other of you will end it, so you might as well take control and do it on your terms. There really isn't any compromise when want person wants daily sex and the other dreads it. So one or other is going to be unhappy until one or other decides they can't live like that any more.

I had the same issue with an ex. Absolutely fantastic, charming, handsome and fun to be with in the daytime but every single night he wanted it and was gung-ho with it to so not particularly pleasant for me. It got to point where I felt more like something for him to just use for his own pleasure as there was no real connection and I honestly think any body would have done. It got to the point of me being almost in tears at the thought of this being the rest of my life (late 40s) as there’s no compromise with him. If I didn’t want it, he’d sulk and would use it as ‘evidence’ of me having an affair. I was v conflicted as he was otherwise just the best BF I’d ever had but this Jekyll and Hyde aspect was just unsustainable for both my physical and mental health so I did reluctantly call it a day. But it did hurt knowing he would always put his sexual needs always ahead of my emotional needs. Eg the day of my BIL funeral where he had died young only 39 from a cancerous brain tumour which gave him just a short last 6 months of life plus he left behind a devastated 5 and 10 year old and was a very hands on fabulous dad so I was upset on many levels. Well he’d been fantastic and driven me 3 hours to attend and I’d booked us a hotel for the night and I just wanted him to hold me that night and be mindful of how I’d likely be feeling - hardly takes an Einstein. So he held me but then to my huge disappointment just turned into full on sex, it was obvious I was reluctant from my body language but knowing how moody he could get and I felt he probably thought I owed him for the long drive down, I just let it happen but was very upset indeed and I think though the break up took another 12 months, I really struggled with that particular memory.