I don't know what to do anymore, I have been with my partner for 5 years, prior to this I was living alone with my eldest 2 children. He moved in within a year but has never paid or contributed to any bills or household costs. I am self employed and work very hard, he was employed in a full time job when we met but he hated and worked long hours- he left a couple of years ago to persue a self employed career with my backing, I bought the equipment and even helped with jobs. This has now been 2 years but he isn't showing any drive or ambition whilst I am continuing to pay for everything, taking on more and more work to cover costs-on my days off I like to have family days or days out again which I have to pay for, I wouldn't mind but he never seems grateful or even like he really wants to be there.
He has recently taken an ad hoc job but it's very irregular and so far any money made has not contributed to anything other than spending money for himself. We have also gone on to have a child who is 18 months old so I also provide everything for him. I am so tired of this situation and question if he stays for the wrong reasons. He is a good man, he does jobs round the house but with all financial pressure and 3 children to support (I also do all the life admin of schools, doctors, clubs etc) I really am at breaking point and it's making me question if I love him anymore down to what feels like complete lack of respect. When I try to talk to him he appears to listen but does nothing to change. It's making me extremely down as it feels very one sided and he doesn't care about my wellbeing at all.
I desperately don't want to bring up my youngest son alone and want to make it work but resentment is building, most of the time he doesn't even seem to like me and to be honest I can see why as I've become more distant and snappy as I just never thought I'd put myself in this position.
I also recently downgraded the tv package to just basic (with Netflix and prime) but got rid of the extras and sport to save money. It's a daily demand now that we need to get the others back- something me or the kids aren't bothered about. I have said I'm not paying for it as I have plenty of other things that take priority but he's getting increasingly annoyed about it. I don't want to cause conflict but not do I want to have football on all the time that I have to pay for 🤦🏻♀️.
Can anyone offer any advice? I really don't know what to do anymore.