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AIBU?

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Original poster

What the hell is wrong with me

33 replies

Zoono · 09/09/2025 18:53

I struggle to build relationships, can't budget and despite having a lot of initial enthusiasm for work or study, I end up completely burning out and having to quit within a year. I can achieve good results in work and academically but only in the short term. I'm in my early 30s and single parenting a toddler. I don't feel like a good role model and can't understand why I don't function like most other adults my age. My daughter is doing fantastic with her milestones and is perfect. I just wish she had a better mum to grow up with.

OP posts:
MousseMousse · 11/09/2025 23:40

You're not stupid:
I can achieve good results in work and academically

You burn out.

I also thought adhd when I read your post. Lots of good info re adhd in girls & women online.

Changing nappies slowly doesn't make you stupid either, it makes you careful. Who knew nappy changing was a race?!

Original poster
Zoono · 11/09/2025 23:36

pinkdelight · 11/09/2025 23:34

Sounds like some kind of processing issue but you’d have to see a psych for a proper assessment and diagnosis.

It could be or I'm just completely stupid. I just wish, I wasn't me.

OP posts:
pinkdelight · 11/09/2025 23:34

Sounds like some kind of processing issue but you’d have to see a psych for a proper assessment and diagnosis.

Original poster
Zoono · 11/09/2025 23:20

I also struggle complete a lot of tasks quickly enough for a lot of employers. No amount of practicing seems to make it any better. That's both in and out of the workplace. An example, is that I've been told by health professionals and relatives that I'm very slow when changing nappies. My DD is doing so well at potty training and has rarely suffered with nappy rash, so it can't be too big of an issue. My brain and body just won't work more quickly though. Could this be related to the other issues that I face? Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
Zoono · 09/09/2025 21:41

I am awaiting an assessment for autism. Maybe some traits might overlap. It just feels very rubbish, especially as most of my family who are my age or above are high achievers and mostly engaged/ married. I do want to achieve but I tend to think I've have to give 200% all the time , whenever I start something new, including being a mum. It's just unsustainable and also helped me to deteriorate with severe post natal anxiety, which I've received treatment for. Is this my life forever, if I am neuro diverse?

OP posts:
RamblingFar · 09/09/2025 19:05

ADHD. I'm self-employed and zero hours employed. Only way I keep a job - though my GP seems amazed that I'm able to hold down any employment at all.

YourTruthorMine · 09/09/2025 19:01

I second ADHD, as someone diagnosed as an adult

RhaenysRocks · 09/09/2025 19:00

Ok I'm probably going to be the first of many to say have you had an ADHD assessment? Not being able to budget, having grand plans but not following through, high ability but burnout. All fairly good indicators of female ADHD. I'm sure you're a lovely mum but you need some support and possibly a diagnosis and medication. I cannot tell you how much it positively impacted my teen son when he finally began meds.

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