Insecure women force men to lie

Do you consider your plan to 'sneak the decorations out' to be a lie?

Cos every other woman in the world is forcing you to stay in this situation.

Okay mate.

This, x 💯

I am going to add to my earlier post here as it connects to the subject of your post.

You are not "forced" to do anything. As I mentioned, I went no contact with a father who was controlled by my abusive mother. The way I see it (and my therapist sees it) is that he made a CHOICE. He chose to lie, deny, defend, ignore, placate, etc. He chose to enable her behavior to keep the peace. And he expected everyone else to, as well.

i don't have a shred of respect for my father. I see him a deeply weak coward.

Despite your subject post, no one is making you lie but yourself. Take some responsibility for your part in this toxic dynamic and why you are choosing to participate in this relationship.

I was in a relationship a long time ago where I was very insecure. With hindsight I realised it was because I knew in my gut he was someone who was untrustworthy. It suited him to be honest with me but he'd have had no problem at all lying if that worked better. Bit like the OP really.

BEHOLD!

A Woman Scolder Because He Has Problems In His Own Relationship But Wants To Blame All Women For His Own Inability To Resolve It And To Blame Them For His Own Independent Decision To Lie.

Mate. Not our fucking fault and and not our fucking problem.

Take it up with the men who fucked her over in the past.

FFS this has nothing to do with ‘insecure women’ but a problem between you and your girlfriend. Sort yourself out and fuck off!

If my ex husband had party Dec's in my loft.
If get them out.
When the kids go they take them no involvement from me
Wouldn't lie about it id say it benefits kids im not going around why would I there isnt any need. Yep had an insecure man previously

OP is specifically telling women how to behave.

Oh, you! We are lovely women as well *blushes.

Thank you so much we (as a collective, insecure entity) will improve from now on! We just needed someone to say!

Imagine lying to say safe, then visualise a risk of injury or death on top and you might understand why you've had so many negative reactions to your drama ...you aren't a victim of anything

That's not a healthy relationship.

You can't fix your relationship by telling all other women apart from your partner that they're making men lie.

She's nuts. Leave her, honestly! Don't make the mistake of thinking all women are that stupid.

I spent nearly 50 years assuming men were all complete fucktards, based on experience. Life got a whole lot better when I dropped that preconception and realised that it was all down to "selection bias" based on low expectations 😜

I completely agree.

The lie is a red herring.

This relationship sounds awful and the girlfriend is controlling and maybe even abusive.

A relationship where you are genuinely afraid to tell the truth about everyday things because of the consequences could be described as at best toxic, at worst abusive.

Stop putting both of you through this hell.

Get out.

I think what you need to do is go on a predominantly male forum and lecture them in a condescending way

@Harrypitty full disclosure I only read your first post. But frankly no one forced anyone to lie. That is a choice you make. And I think you really need to think of this is the relationship for you.

What OP says is not a command. No wonder there’s so much conflict when people deliberately misinterpret what’s been written or said.

You are treading a very thin line!

This is the exact method controlling partners use to justify their actions.

We’ve seen it time and time again on here where it’s easier to tell a white lie to not cause a big issue but then that white lie gets found out and all of a sudden the controller has exactly what they want because they can accuse the other person constantly.

The issue here is your jealous and controlling partner.
You should never have to lie just to not have an argument, that is ridiculous!

Tell your girlfriend the truth.
If she goes off on one, so what. Tell her to leave if she doesn’t like it.

If you carry on letting her control you, it will just get worse and worse.

I agree that you should be able to lend these decorations out but lying won't help either of you. Lying weakens your connection with your partner. Instead of having a conversation about it to understand each other and get on the same page, you are avoiding the issue allowing it to exist between you and potentially grow. It will only cause emotional distance between you.

Thank god. We were just getting hysterical and about to faint.

An insecure or jealous partner will cause people to lie.
Male or female doesn't matter.
Surely other women on here have experienced this?

Problem is if you lie and she finds out it then makes her more insecure and it’s a never ending cycle. Tell her the truth and have a long hard think it this is someone you want to spend the rest of your life with

I feel nauseous after reading that bit of mansplaining. ‘Lovely ladies’ erghhhbeluarghhh!!

I think controlling people do make their partners tell white lies, yes. I was in a violent relationship and told my partner that I thought the young, attractive man I often worked on shift with was gay. He wasn’t and I wasn’t doing anything remotely inappropriate but it was the only way to avoid being shouted at until 1am about whether or not I wanted to screw him….