To think promiscuous men should be shamed more?

"Probably". They also didn't have contraception and religious shame was much higher. The downsides have already been explain very well upthread....

Because then they have "women trying to control us and how we act" as extra ammunition

You clearly do think they should be shamed and in fact you ARE already engaging in shaming them

And still no answer about religious upbringing...

That study seems the suggest that it's the other way around. Women are attempting to trick men into relationships by signing up to a casual sex website, but with the intention of long term relationships.

I used the internet for hookups before you were born.

just saying.

You don't "believe" that but there are plenty of experiences on MN which suggest otherwise to your belief

This. If they have willing partners, what’s the issue?

You’ve been typing ‘w’ instead of ‘with’ and ‘bc’ instead of because’ this morning too.

Up to you of course. It’s just weird given the shit load of typing you’ve been doing in all your posts.

Anyway, I still don’t think you’ve made it clear why you think men and women should be shamed.

I don’t think the body count is as important across the whole age range as you think it is from your perspective.

I know this is very patronising, and I'm going to sound like my mother, but you're 19. I would also say I don't know anything about lesbian relationships.

Most people your age are still in the exploratory phase- they aren't looking for something long-term. I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's probably quite healthy to be having a couple ONS at that age- it gives you an idea of what you enjoy, without having to commit long-term.

Wait until you're in your late twenties/early thirties and everyone will be rushing to settle down ime.

What would all this 'shame' achieve in your view? The problem I see with it, is that the flip side of being upset over a man not wanting a ltr after a ONS, is being trapped in a relationship with someone you don't like and all the blackmail that goes with that 'if you leave me no-one else will want you'.

Given the choice I'd prefer a broken heart and move on, rather than being trapped with a man I don't love out of 'shame'.

Exactly, shaming drives things underground and private and makes it harder to be able to talk about if things go wrong

Agree. And shaming gets nowhere. It’s not helpful.

And we need to be able to openly talk about kink and sex

So we can teach young people these safe practices

I go for Rack. Risk aware consensual kink.

@Moveoverdarlin @CommissarySushi @Greggsit @NoThanksNeeded all have it spot on.

Yip.

And I was more than happy to shag rings round me. Loads of ONS. A regular FWB and a fuck buddy or two.

And some were even kinky.

And being old had no risks of pregnancy. And even before I was that age had a coil in. And made them wear a condom.

🤷🏼‍♀️ it was fun.

👏

There's nothing inherently wrong about violence, dom/sub, humiliation etc in sex so long as its practised under the kink mantra of "safe, sane and consensual"

But you're showing more and more your actual issues

I ask again... have you been raised with a particularly religious view at home?

I suppose it depends what viewpoint you come from. I never regarded myself as a notch on someone’s bedpost. I regarded them as a notch on mine.

There's a very definite "women can't make the decision to have no strings attached sex and are being forced by the nasty men to do so" theme here

Your age is important because you keep telling people they don't know what they're on about because they're old. Maybe not that directly but the implications are there

You're doing the very teenager on the cusp of "full" adulthood thing of "my generation knows better"

Slut shaming women was part of the fundamentals of witch hunts when you look into it.

Slut shaming men would become a whole other issue. And I'm pretty sure would only make "alpha men" worse tbh.

You're not giving women any agency here. They are either being lied to, or doing something they don't really want to do. Why can't you accept that there are plenty of women that are very happy with their online dating choices or their ONS? Your only comments along that line are that you don't know many women that do, but that's not exactly a representative sample.

I understand that your issue is with the double standard applied to men. However I'm wondering whether rather than holding men to the same standard of 'morality', (which is after all just a social construct, as lots of consensual sex with multiple partners, with precautions, isn't objectively harmful) as women, is where we should be focusing.
Better perhaps to challenge the stigma and judgement of women choosing to have safe consensual sex with multiple men. Because, the problem with the encouragement of any form of shaming on 'moral' rather than practical grounds, is that it inevitably swings back twice as hard on women.
Basically, if you create a climate where men are shamed for promiscuity, guess who going to be landed with the greater shame for allowing them to be promiscuous?