to take ds1’s phone off him until he takes school serious?

YANBU

Fist bump, My 14yr old doesn’t need school because he going to become a rapper 🙄
He does actually go to school but I’m of the verging same opinion as your husband to panicking. He’s going to do it the long painful way, for a child who hates English he’ll probably have to do it again if he doesn’t put the work in.
However I hated school, had pretty poor GCSEs but a few years later I had finished a L3 college course and went to uni at 23yrs so I know it can take time for some people.

It's hard work being a SM influencer. Most have qualifications in marketing, business, or journalism. If he wants to do that he needs to knuckle down. Maybe see if any of his fav people will reply to a message about how to make it a career and he'll see it's not just making a video.

Tbh I doubt he's serious about it and either thinks he just CBA and life will hand him everything on a plate or is being a teenager and probably feeling under pressure and rebelling against the expectations of exams/success.

When people with degrees are struggling to get jobs, it's not good to have no qualifications. Maybe he'll be happy with a min wage job. A lot of people are. But if he wants money then he'll have to work bloody hard at either a job or in education.

TikTok has a lot to answer for. Nobody really ‘makes it’ on there and most of the popular ones are popular for all the wrong reasons. Most end up quitting due to their mental health so maybe he needs a bit of a reality check.

Let him laugh but tell him he won’t be laughing when he’s living at home earning nothing while his friends are off to uni, working and buying cars.

I don’t think you’re being unreasonable. It is so difficult when they are that age. Do you plan on giving back the phone to your son during the day when he’s at school and then taking it back once he’s home? Or taking it away completely?

YANBU