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Original poster

What would your husband say if he came home from work and you’d had a drink?

463 replies

khlolea · 08/09/2025 18:55

I have had a glass of wine tonight after work, thought why not?
Dh is home and is furious, speaking to me like a disgrace and slamming cupboards.
I now have an uncomfortable silence which isn’t quite a silence because he’s saying he’s not giving me the silent treatment.

OP posts:
ellyeth · 09/09/2025 22:13

My husband doesn't drink at all and he would never behave like that. Unless you were flat out drunk, what is the issue - do you have to ask his permission to drink without him?

theonlygirl · 09/09/2025 21:54

Well these days, probably be pleasantly suprised and hopeful the night might have a happy ending, because I dont drink much these days. But even the old me, he only said something when it was a bit too much, and then it was out of concern. Never angry or banging doors. But context is everything, if you're a recovering alcoholic or an absolute nightmare when you drink, his reaction might be more understandable.

BitOutOfPractice · 09/09/2025 21:36

My DP would say “where’s mine?”

Unless there’s a massive backstory where you are an alcoholic, then he’s being ridiculous!

Does he behave like an arsehole about other things?

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 09/09/2025 21:31

Absolutely nothing, as I’m an adult and make my own choices/decisions.

If be concerned as to why his initial reaction is anger, then subsequently silent treatment, which is a form of emotional abuse, why can’t he use his words?

What’s made you have a drink tonight OP, is it that you just fancied one and thought “meh” or has something happened?.

Ilikegreen · 09/09/2025 21:28

Anything from ‘pour me one’, ‘let’s chill a second bottle’ to ‘not drinking this week, tonight’. Sounds like he takes his work very seriously! What does he do?

Phoenixfire1988 · 09/09/2025 21:19

Nothing because I'm a whole ass adult and can do what I want without asking anyones permission first

opencecilgee · 09/09/2025 21:16

He wouldn’t notice or care

crappycrapcrap · 09/09/2025 21:10

How miserable of him. I’d want a drink just thinking about him not allowing it.. and I hardly drink.

Unless you have mental health/physical health needs/ an addiction or your caring for a newborn, I think he’s being an arsehole.

Nanof8 · 09/09/2025 20:57

Mine would asked "Where's mine?"

mondaytosunday · 09/09/2025 20:54

He’d say ‘ah lovely, where’s my glass’?

LouiseK93 · 09/09/2025 20:48

He would say "ooooo someone having a drinkypoos" laughing, I would laugh...life would continue. He would probably think it odd because ive never been a drinking at home type.

Bundleflower · 09/09/2025 20:43

If it was before 6pm he’d ask me if I’d had a hard day.
After 6pm, he’d pour himself a glass and we’d bitch about work together.

OriginalUsername2 · 09/09/2025 20:41

khlolea · 08/09/2025 19:06

I think we have different views on alcohol, my parents had the occasional glass of wine with dinner and our family socialised with bbq and drink but his mum once went mad when we had a drink in her garden one day.
I think he thinks drinks are for special occasions or holidays but to randomly have a drink on a work night is alcoholic behaviour and totally derogatory

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That will be it then. Was his dad or her dad an alcoholic?

Frenzi · 09/09/2025 20:39

If he told me what to do I would tell him to fuck off!

He's my husband not my mother. He has no right to tell me what I can and cant do - just like I would never tell him.

GiraffesAtThePark · 09/09/2025 20:36

He has a strange view of alcohol. Though I suppose it’s healthier than those who overindulge. I really can’t get in his mindset but it’s obvious come from his parents.

AlexisP90 · 09/09/2025 20:36

DH doesnt really drink but he would probably say do you need a top up while im in the kitchen..

RobertJohnsonsShoes · 09/09/2025 20:16

It would be a footnote.
Whats it got to do with him? Cheeky fucker.

MayRecollectionsVary · 09/09/2025 20:11

Mine would be fine but maybe a bit surprised as we usually wait until our son is in bed around 7/8pm before sometimes having a drink. (Not every night.)

Maybe your husband feels it's evidence of a wider issue with alcohol and that's why he's so affected by it? But even then his behaviour sounds very intimidating and not the way to handle things.

NotAMessiahJustAVeryNaughtyBoy · 09/09/2025 20:11

I’m not sure my husband would even register I was having a drink unless I was visibly drunk. Honestly, if he or anyone else dared to tell me I was a disgrace for having a drink in my own home whenever I wanted to, I’d laugh in their face and then tell them to fuck off.

tommyhoundmum · 09/09/2025 19:37

khlolea · 08/09/2025 18:58

No but it is a bit unusual for me to have a drink without him

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You've unnerved him a bit as that was out of the ordinary.

Falseknock · 09/09/2025 19:33

khlolea · 08/09/2025 18:58

No but it is a bit unusual for me to have a drink without him

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Tell him to "grow up"

DramaLlamacchiato · 09/09/2025 19:33

Mine would be extremely shocked, but that’s because I haven’t drunk alcohol in 4 years.

Unless there’s a backstory eg that you or he are alcoholics, his reaction is extreme.

1apenny2apenny · 09/09/2025 19:32

He would say ‘what day is it?’ meaning it’s a week day and we try not to drink in the week. We drink quite a lot so it wouldn’t be a surprise for him to see me with a drink.

Jayne35 · 09/09/2025 19:29

Probably something like 'bad day love? I'll join you' and pour himself one. We don't drink on weekdays but if I did it would not be an issue. Furious with you is a bit much.

PinkTigermum · 09/09/2025 19:28

Have you got and are you in charge of young children until he gets home? If yes, then imo you should wait until there’s another adult around in case of emergency. However, as an adult it’s at your discretion.