What would your husband say if he came home from work and you’d had a drink?

khlolea · 2025-09-08T17:55:13+00:00

I have had a glass of wine tonight after work, thought why not? Dh is home and is furious, speaking to me like a disgrace and slamming cupboards. I now have an uncomfortable silence which isn’t quite a silence because he’s saying he’s not giving me the silent treatment.

Someonelookedatmypostinghistorysoichanged · 15/09/2025 14:32

Why don’t you usually drink without him?
His reaction is not that of an equal in any relationship

ruethewhirl · 15/09/2025 14:24

Cherrytree86 · 15/09/2025 13:34

@ruethewhirl

im only messing! Who would really think that?!

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Fair enough 😄given some of the nonsense that's been spouted by pps, I didn't pick up on the sarcasm! 😄

Cherrytree86 · 15/09/2025 13:34

ruethewhirl · 15/09/2025 04:46

OMG unclench!!

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@ruethewhirl

im only messing! Who would really think that?!

ruethewhirl · 15/09/2025 04:46

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 14:52

@Starlight1984

shes right though…you should only drink on special occasions or holidays.

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OMG unclench!!

Roobarbtwo · 13/09/2025 14:00

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 14:37

@Skybluepinky

totally agree…a drink on a week night is a slippery sleep to being an alcoholic . Your husband doesn’t want you to be decrepit, Op - listen to him.

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No it is not. A glass of wine on a week night is not a slippery slope to being an alcoholic. Tell that to people who go to pubs or restaurants during the week for a meal and a drink. Why would someone drinking a glass of wine during the week become decrepit as opposed to having a glass on a Friday night - why do women always need to be shamed like this?

Hollowvoice · 11/09/2025 19:15

Zimunya · 10/09/2025 10:44

A friend gave me a fridge magnet which said, "I love to cook with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food." Thought you might enjoy that!

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Ha, I bought that same thing for my Dad.
Wonder where I get it from... 😄

Illegally18 · 11/09/2025 14:33

AgeingGreycefully · 10/09/2025 07:26

Mine would be a little surprised, because it is a rare occurrence, but genuinely ask if I’d had a bad/tough day! There would be absolutely no judgement or attitude.

Yes, that's a reasonable reaction to that occurrence.

pollymere · 11/09/2025 13:45

I think mine would be concerned or worried rather than angry. He'd probably expect me to have a drink with him when he got back rather than starting early!

ThatWasJustANoise · 11/09/2025 11:58

Usernamenotav · 11/09/2025 11:04

He wouldn't mind, but he would think it was odd. Depends if you have kids etc. I think the wine culture after work is a bit nuts. It's a drug after all. He's no right to treat you like crao though
Sounds like there's something else going on, did his parents drink a lot when he was a kid?

It's a legal drug. An adult having a glass of wine after work is hardly crazy or hitting rock bottom.

Cherrytree86 · 11/09/2025 11:20

Usernamenotav · 11/09/2025 11:04

He wouldn't mind, but he would think it was odd. Depends if you have kids etc. I think the wine culture after work is a bit nuts. It's a drug after all. He's no right to treat you like crao though
Sounds like there's something else going on, did his parents drink a lot when he was a kid?

@Usernamenotav
why does it depend on if they have kids?

Usernamenotav · 11/09/2025 11:04

He wouldn't mind, but he would think it was odd. Depends if you have kids etc. I think the wine culture after work is a bit nuts. It's a drug after all. He's no right to treat you like crao though
Sounds like there's something else going on, did his parents drink a lot when he was a kid?

dollyblue01 · 11/09/2025 08:32

I don’t drink on weekdays, so he’d probably think I was stressed, but he’d join me for a few. Definitely wouldn’t be an issue at all.

autienotnaughty · 11/09/2025 08:26

My dh only drinks Saturdays as he tries to be healthy. I don’t drink often so if I did he would be surprised and might say “your having a drink ?” But he wouldn’t be cross.
Sounds like he has some shame around drinking alcohol, which will be from his upbringing. It’s funny how much this stuff impacts on us. I wouldn’t stand for being shouted at though. You are not an extension of him if you want a drink you have one.

ThatWasJustANoise · 11/09/2025 08:06

Cherrytree86 · 11/09/2025 07:52

@ThatWasJustANoise

yeah, you got me - of course I’m being sarcastic but the fact that you’re not entirely sure really does show how entrenched the mumsnet weirdness is around alcohol doesn’t it?!

oh and re the dog threads, I’m more genuine on those - I actually really like dogs just not silly entitled owners who for example sit their dogs on chairs in pubs, cafes, buses and trains meant for humans. I spend a lot on my clothes I do NOT want to risk any potential residue from muddy paws/shitty dog arse/hair getting on my clothes.

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😁I thought you were and yes I agree.

I love dogs too. There is a woman that comes in our local who sits down and then puts her dog on the next seat. People are standing up. I can't believe she hasn't been told to stop it.

I have dogs but they don't go shopping or to cafés either.

Barnbrack · 11/09/2025 07:57

We're you in charge of kids alone? If not then my husband would laugh and go about his day. I fact I had a single glass on an after school playdate once and he also just laughed

Cherrytree86 · 11/09/2025 07:52

ThatWasJustANoise · 11/09/2025 07:29

The dogs threads.

I don't actually know if you were being sarcastic on this thread though.

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@ThatWasJustANoise

yeah, you got me - of course I’m being sarcastic but the fact that you’re not entirely sure really does show how entrenched the mumsnet weirdness is around alcohol doesn’t it?!

oh and re the dog threads, I’m more genuine on those - I actually really like dogs just not silly entitled owners who for example sit their dogs on chairs in pubs, cafes, buses and trains meant for humans. I spend a lot on my clothes I do NOT want to risk any potential residue from muddy paws/shitty dog arse/hair getting on my clothes.

ThatWasJustANoise · 11/09/2025 07:29

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 23:24

@ThatWasJustANoise

oh really? What other comments of mine have amused you?

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The dogs threads.

I don't actually know if you were being sarcastic on this thread though.

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 23:24

ThatWasJustANoise · 10/09/2025 15:15

This is not the first time you've amused me with your comments.

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@ThatWasJustANoise

oh really? What other comments of mine have amused you?

Soberinthecity · 10/09/2025 17:57

So much context missing from this post to make any sort of judgement. The Passive aggression though, that’s totally uncalled for - it doesn’t matter what the situation is.

CauseImMrDarkside · 10/09/2025 16:30

Not that she would, but, as I as husband would not be bothered!

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 10/09/2025 15:46

Starlight1984 · 10/09/2025 15:26

Is a Wednesday a special occasion?

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Yep!

Happy hump day everyone! Glug glug

Mumstillgonenuts2025 · 10/09/2025 15:46

How much was the bottle that you opened! If £25.00 that is the issue!

Starlight1984 · 10/09/2025 15:26

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 14:52

@Starlight1984

shes right though…you should only drink on special occasions or holidays.

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Is a Wednesday a special occasion?

Starlight1984 · 10/09/2025 15:26

Cherrytree86 · 10/09/2025 14:52

@Starlight1984

shes right though…you should only drink on special occasions or holidays.

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😂

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 10/09/2025 15:21

One drink? Fucking hell

I go to a pub quiz every Tuesday. Last night DH sent me some money without me even asking just to make sure I could definitely have a drink or two. I wasn't even going to, but he didn't like the possibility of me not being able to (I spent the money on chips)

If he came home and I'd had a glass of wine, he'd probably say something like "oh, that's unusual for you rough day?" if he even said anything at all.

Being furious is weird behaviour unless you were drunk and unable to take care of the kids.