To think most rich people don’t understand how the rest of us live?

YANBU. About 25 years ago when our DC were young, my DH's boss was a very wealthy man. This boss sacrificed most of his salary and instead invested it in the company's excellent personal pension scheme. It was an incredibly cost effective way of investing.

Boss man couldn't understand why DH didn't do the same. When DH explained that he needed to keep most of his salary to pay mortgage/bills/food etc Boss man was genuinely perplexed. In his world you inherited the property you lived in and trust funds covered the bills. He was even more perplexed when he realised that our DC were at state schools so we didn't even have to cover school fees!

I think he was so rich and so privileged he just couldn't imagine that a working class lad from the other side of the tracks could be working at the same level as his aristocratic Eton/Cambridge self.

Boss Man retired a few years ago and DH now does his job. We are in the happy position that DH now sacrifices a lot of his salary for extra holiday allowance, pension contributions and other benefits but he isn't dumb enough to think that the youngsters working for him could do the same.

I'm also petty enough to be delighted that our two state educated children are much more financially successful than the boss's (lovely) adult kids. Although that could be from necessity as ours don't have trust funds.

@MangoChia
the problem is that people paid relatively small amounts for services like cleaning, walking a dog twice a week, cleaning your wheelie bin are living paycheque to paycheque so if you do not pay them on friday the £40 in cash or BACS immediately they then can't go to Aldi for weekend food shop especially if another person like yourself has also forgotten to pay. but they need food as they never earn enough to hav a well stocked pantry and a full freezer, so they have to pay by credit card... if they have one but they might not be able to get one so they have to borrow from payday loans say £40 to pay back £50 within 4 weeks so now their £40food shop has cost £50 but they will still only get £40 late and they are still waiting for someone else so they are now stressed having to remind you to pay etc etc and next week if you still don't pay it will be worse, so when you finally pay them next week £ 80 they pay back last weeks shop of £40 and buy this weeks groceries another £40 and £10 interest so now still £10 down for this weeks shop so have to borrow again etc as they really can't cut grocery bill to £30 to make up for the interest
so unfortunately when you delay payment you are possibly causing hardship albeit not maliciously by forcing them into credit traps for necessities while you are constantly paying for credit you can't build a buffer
this is why when we are slightly richer we should be very prompt paying those earning much less. Most small businesses fail not because they are rubbish at what they do but due to cash flow problems having to payout sooner than they are paid
a small business will need to pay for supplies pretty quickly but lots of big businesses only pay 56 days later and can get supplies on credit terms too.

Supermarkets often pay farmers 2 -3 months after they get the goods and they have been paid for and eaten and the farmer who paid for the seed fertiliser labour etc all upfront sill has no money back and until he is paid he can't buy for next year theis is why small farms often can't cope as they can't get the credit yet the big companies who could easily pay them basically bully them into waiting months and they have no bargaining power

I definitely didn't piss around at school and I've got excellent qualifications. But I'm saying that working hard at school doesn't guarantee a well paid job, just as pissing around at school doesn't necessarily mean you'll end up with a low paid job.

About a fifth of Londoners are claiming unemployment benefit, snd many more are claiming in-work benefits. That's not working age, that's the gross figure. About 45% of Londoners are below/above working age, which means that from a working population, about 30% are not paying their own housing costs and more on top are subsidised. Who do you think IS paying them?

These days, unfortunately, many of them are graduates. Nobody told them that increasing the number of university places doesn’t increase the number of available graduate positions. So now they have the same job they’d possibly have had anyway, but with £50k debt to never pay off. Hopefully some will eventually find a better opening.

I think we are getting poorer as a country and Millenials now have the more dominant voices on MN and will in Politics too, quite soon. So things are changing. Most people have to work really hard to afford life and have children, that is just the reality on the ground.
Previously, the advice was “buy the worst house on the best street”, now it is more like, buy anything you can afford, get to work in somehow and be happy long term.
With increased poverty comes the realisation that people around you matter more and so does community. For the longest time, we have all been manipulated into purchasing stuff we do not actually need.
The war generation did not do that. They valued each other and recycled. Look the Boomers set the capitalist scene and had a wail of a time, but it is coming to an end. So what I say. Love and community matters more than money. As long as you actually have somewhere to live and we do have free health and education in this country and a benefits system and food banks and we should all be grateful for it and value it and respect it and each other.
I do not want to preach but a lot of desperate people are turning to the likes of Nigel Farage who is going to ruin it all and take whatever little is left from the poorest.

I'm not sure I agree. I've sometimes found that those who've pulled themselves up by their bootstraps ( or whatever the expression is) think, well, I've done it therefore you can too!

Some people have it much, much harder, and that's just the way it is.

I don't think it's fair to qualify or minimise it. Life is an unjust thing.

Lots of us would be in totally different positions, would have worked less hard at school etc etc had out backgrounds been different.

I was once unsure what to do career and life-wise so bought a recommended book “What Should I Do With My Life” which recommended talking a year off to travel and think 🤔 or taking a backseat on career by renting out a ‘spare room’ in your home. So ridiculous. Needless to say I still hang no idea what to do with my life

So you think family set up, your parents values, your school, your health, your community, your access to provisions, your safety, your peers etc have nothing to do with educational attainment?

I hope your job doesn’t have anything to do with helping people or require any critical thinking!

But, as you correctly point out, she had a choice.

I think it really depends. I had a childhood of abject poverty, neglect and trauma. Not having shoes kind of poverty. I was lucky to be fairly bright and very determined and worked and studied very very hard (and I appreciate not everyone can do that) and I very gradually pulled myself out of it. I then met my husband who came from a working class family, also first to go to university and together we have very good jobs and are now very financially secure. I have not, and will never forget what it was like to be so cold I got chilblains, to have 8 teeth removed because I didn’t have a toothbrush and to be looked down upon as one of the poorest families in a very poverty stricken area. I know very well that you can scrimp and cut corners, work very very hard, but still not have enough money. My siblings aren’t in a great financial situation still and I would never judge - we help out and are glad and grateful to be able to do so - we also try and do it in a way that won’t embarrass them. So yes, it depends.

Quite!!

So you pissed around at school then? I'm not saying its you but we all know the girls who focused on make up and boys rather than lessons. Unsurprisingly now we are back at school with our own kids we are in very different positions.

Don't know about porridge journalist - but on the basis of disregarding advice because the person giving it is wealthy, well, on that basis we should block our ears to Martin Lewis!

Exactly, 100k goes not very far. Many people think everyone lives out in the sticks. Millions have to live in London due to jobs etc. We paid 5.5k in rental, to mortgage in our area would be double that. That’s the average in our very large area. I’m sure many can’t understand that.

I hadn't said anything about class? I've said hard work at school leads to better outcomes - if that makes me snob, i am a snob, but it would stop me encouraging my kids to ignore the disruptors focus on work and succeed.

That's not the reason why many people end up in low-paying jobs. The idea that everybody can get rich (or at least comfortable) just by working hard at school is an arrogant assumption that really pisses me off. It's a perfect example of how some rich people feel so entitled and don't understand what life is like for others.

Yes this is thoughtless.

When I know someone is watching pennies I always offer to pay for ourselves, and I would definitely prefer (and not mind at all) if they ask to do this and make that clear from the outset.

On the other hand, I have a friend (not actually so badly off at all tbh) who watches what everyone eats and if someone gets even one thing more, she says loudly, in a tone that is both aggrieved and a bit aggressive: "well if that's being added to the bill, I might as well get another drink/ dessert/ coffee as well" every time someone orders something like a coffee.

I guess it irritates me because a) she ought to know by now I don't just split down the middle regardless and b) it makes it clear she's less worried about total spend in and of itself, and mostly worried about the risk of (horror above horrors!!) subsidising someone else, even if it means her paying more to avoid that risk.

It comes across as mean-spirited and to be honest a bit controlling - as though what she really wants is no-one else to have what they want to suit her. I don't know why she doesn't say at the outset something like "Well you take whatever you fancy and don't let me put you off if I skip the starter; I'm watching my expenditure atm," or something.

Because I would never have split it equally when I know someone present is watching their spending and I have never caused her to subsidise others, I always have a slight sadistic pleasure in saying at the end "well, let's all pay for what we ordered shall we!"

So I think its perfectly ok to not want to subsidise others, but there are ways and ways of handling it nicely.

Showing what a snob you are. Money really doesn't buy class.

That's not to say we don't need minimum wage employees - they do some important work, but people do to high degree select their route themselves. Oddly for many what they are told about working hard at school to get a good job didn't apply to them at the time.

It must be lovely being so naive!

I think it depends on upbringing. I was raised with a mixture of middle class parents and moments of financial hardship. I may now be considered very comfortable but I value every penny. I think hard before most purchases and I 100% do realise how tough it is for people.

If people haven’t ever experienced it, they’ll find it harder to relate.

Many of them.

Do you really think thats what all minium wage employees did or do?