Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Are full stops passive aggressive?

288 replies

Samas · 07/09/2025 22:16

Are full stops really passive-aggressive now? According to my colleague they are, especially in text messages. Apparently, ending a sentence correctly is no longer “neutral” but somehow comes across as cold or hostile.

yabu= full stops are indeed PA
yanbu= of course they’re not

OP posts:
TinyIsMyNewt · 08/09/2025 00:37

I don't think it's as much of an age thing as people are suggesting. I have senior colleagues, in their early 60s, who absolutely use periods at the end of emails and Teams messages when they're intending to be passive aggressive.

SnowFrogJelly · 08/09/2025 00:36

.

ErrolTheDinosaur · 08/09/2025 00:35

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:21

You know what's even worse than ending messages with an x?

Work colleagues who mean to put x, but keep hitting c by mistake. I was confused for weeks what it meant. From context, I'd guessed it meant the same thing as :s

Show quote history

I cannot begin to imagine work colleagues ending a message with an x.
It’d be grossly unprofessional.Confused

murasaki · 08/09/2025 00:34

Rednorth · 08/09/2025 00:33

Surely the most passive aggressive way to sign off is with an ellipsis.

It's like a punctuated version of 'You better not leave me on read right now...'

Oh yes, I will admit to using a pass agg ellipsis on occasion.

It's basically the equivalent of 'have a little think about what I just said'.

Rednorth · 08/09/2025 00:33

Surely the most passive aggressive way to sign off is with an ellipsis.

It's like a punctuated version of 'You better not leave me on read right now...'

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:31

Mustbethat · 08/09/2025 00:20

What about a good old interrobang?!

I think those should make a comeback.

Show quote history

No-one has dared to object to my use of them, so I'm assuming they're taken as intended.

GleisZwei · 08/09/2025 00:30

Rightandwrong · 07/09/2025 23:37

Well it shows your DC is a sheep if he doesn't use punctuation just because his friends don't.
If he knows the correct way to communicate is to use punctuation why lower himself to the level of illiterate people who don't?

Show quote history

Ha ha ha.
He's not illiterate, far from it.
He knows how to communicate in different situations, that's actually a skill and adaptability.
Go and be rude elsewhere.

murasaki · 08/09/2025 00:26

Mustbethat · 08/09/2025 00:20

What about a good old interrobang?!

I think those should make a comeback.

Show quote history

I had to google that, and it's the punctuation mark I never knew I needed. I fully support its integration back into mainstream communication.

What do we want - interrobangs
When do we want them - about 20 years ago

ARichtGoodDram · 08/09/2025 00:26

Three of mine said that a while back. After a week or so of my ending messages with ". Not mad." it was decided that they'd accept my formal punctuation style and not assume I was pissed off by it.

Somewhat amusingly the child who was most put out by my old fashioned ways now works in a very formal office and I can tell when she's been texting a colleague just before me because her texts arrive with proper punctuation 😂

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:21

Mustbethat · 08/09/2025 00:11

Apparently it is. Some younger work colleagues told me they were worried they’d upset me until they realised I’m old enough to remember punctuation.

my dc hate it as well, though now it’s a bit of a joke between their friends and friends mums that I am single handedly attempting to bring grammar back.

i don’t use “x” at the end either. That’s what full stops are for, it’s redundant to replace it with an x.

You know what's even worse than ending messages with an x?

Work colleagues who mean to put x, but keep hitting c by mistake. I was confused for weeks what it meant. From context, I'd guessed it meant the same thing as :s

Mustbethat · 08/09/2025 00:20

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:15

Question marks are fine, don't worry.

What about a good old interrobang?!

I think those should make a comeback.

murasaki · 08/09/2025 00:18

It's those semicolons you have to watch out for, terribly oppressive.

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:15

Question marks are fine, don't worry.

NotAhotWeatherPerson · 08/09/2025 00:12

If you're asking a question, are question marks okay, or passive aggressive?

Mustbethat · 08/09/2025 00:11

Apparently it is. Some younger work colleagues told me they were worried they’d upset me until they realised I’m old enough to remember punctuation.

my dc hate it as well, though now it’s a bit of a joke between their friends and friends mums that I am single handedly attempting to bring grammar back.

i don’t use “x” at the end either. That’s what full stops are for, it’s redundant to replace it with an x.

NoSoapJustUseShowerGel · 08/09/2025 00:11

Apparently gen z see them as passive aggressive. I see them as helpful for clarity in writing. Don’t get me started on lack of punctuation these days!

murasaki · 08/09/2025 00:08

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:06

Maybe that explains the mutual incomprehension for each of us then. I've been savagely pressing the full stop at the end of messages since my first Nokia 3310.

Friend from school: cn i borrow a tenner?
Me, enraged that she can ask me this when she still owes me £10 from last month: No.

Edited
Show quote history

Totally reasonable rage from you there though, the cheeky mare.

murasaki · 08/09/2025 00:07

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:06

Maybe that explains the mutual incomprehension for each of us then. I've been savagely pressing the full stop at the end of messages since my first Nokia 3310.

Friend from school: cn i borrow a tenner?
Me, enraged that she can ask me this when she still owes me £10 from last month: No.

Edited
Show quote history

Haha! Yes, clearly different types of rage!

NotAhotWeatherPerson · 08/09/2025 00:07

OK, it's not just the under 30s. I'm firmly in the middle of Gen X. While I was on this thread I was getting messages from my 32 year old. No full stops at the end.

AstonUniversityPotholeDepartment · 08/09/2025 00:06

murasaki · 07/09/2025 23:56

No, my rage is cold. Sorry to disappoint.

Show quote history

Maybe that explains the mutual incomprehension for each of us then. I've been savagely pressing the full stop at the end of messages since my first Nokia 3310.

Friend from school: cn i borrow a tenner?
Me, enraged that she can ask me this when she still owes me £10 from last month: No.

NImumconfused · 08/09/2025 00:06

Pepperypottery · 07/09/2025 23:26

It seems to me people are being purposefully obtuse on this thread.
It isn’t a problem with every full stop, it’s only full stops at the end of a message. If you bother to try and think about it, text conversations are continuous now due to unlimited data/wifi. Previously, text messages were limited in length as pp mentioned. Now, if you put a full stop at the end of a message, it indicates that the conversation is over, you are forcefully bringing the dialogue to a close, instead of allowing the rolling, text-based conversation to continue. For all the eye-rolling about the sensitivities of younger generations on this thread, there seems to be a sort of delight in the opportunity to be irritated by them.

I am impressed by how many people are conscientiously whacking full stops at the end of their posts though. I’m off to survey some other threads and see if others are so rigorous

I don't think they're necessarily being obtuse, I just think some of us (probably the older ones, to be fair) can't quite get our heads round the idea that normal punctuation is being interpreted like this. It would never have occurred to me not to put a full stop at the end of a sentence.

I'd actually never noticed that my teenagers don't put full stops on their WhatsApp messages, but I've just checked and they don't - wonder if they've been thinking I'm permanently cross with them for the last few years? 😂

whitewineandsun · 08/09/2025 00:05

GleisZwei · 07/09/2025 23:57

Um, what now?
I absolutely cannot stand a 'x' from anyone other than very close family/friends!

Show quote history

Absolutely agree. And even then I don't love it.

NotAhotWeatherPerson · 08/09/2025 00:05

Carrotsurprise · 07/09/2025 23:52

The only people I know who put full stops at the end of messages are boomers or a couple of my friends who are autistic. The most socially acceptable way of ending a short message is an x, at least among women.

None of my women friends do that, unless it's meant to be caring. Like if we're talking about a relative who died and they're feeling sad. Otherwise it would be weird to be sending random kisses to my friends.

wand3rer · 08/09/2025 00:03

In emails and on forums, I tend to use proper punctuation.

In chats, I use full stops between sentences but not at the very end of the message.

I’m over 30. I don’t find full stops aggressive. They just feel oddly formal in chat. As a result they make the message sound cold and distant. Not sure why! 😅

ErrolTheDinosaur · 08/09/2025 00:02

I just looked back through our family WhatsApp’s - me , DH and under 30 dd. There’s really no pattern to when any of us use full stops and when we forget. Some of it is full sentences, some messages are brief and abbreviated.
I think this means we’re all adults who know how to communicate with each other.

Swipe left for the next trending thread