To not let my DD17 travel alone on an 6 hour trip across Greece to visit her boyfriend

if they are so desperate for her to join them why doesn't the bf travel 6 hours to travel with her?

For me the taxis are a worry.

Also missing school. This is not the way to start 6th form.

That would be a hell no from me. My dd has been angling to go on holiday abroad this year with friends. No bloody way. She can wait until she’s 18. Admittedly I went with 2 friends at 17. But I was a lot more streetwise. No way would I have been ok at 17 to do what your dd is proposing. I’m also forgetful, get bee in my bonnet, a bit highly strung as they used to say. If she’s anything like me, travelling alone would have been massively anxiety inducing and something going wrong would have brought on panic.

If true about the family, it sounds like they and her boyfriend have really got under her skin. I’d be keeping a big eye on that one tbh as it’s a bit of a red flag. And talking to her about making choices for her long term happiness, not just the next few months. And if the relationship is meant to be, they will be ok. That she will be able to trust in things. That it is natural and normal for him to panic a bit that she may move away for university. However, this is a process and a test of their relationship. It’s not feasible to decide beforehand what will and won’t happen between them.

I agree with the OP, but km surprised there are not more dissenting views, as from people I know, 17 year olds are expected to be independent and enough to do this ok d of thing

It's not just the travel, though, is it? (Though I think it's a lot for a girl who seems to have poor organisational skills) It's the prior commitments and the controlling tendencies the bf seems to be exhibiting. Those would be good enough reasons to say no without the complicated travel arrangements.

Oh absolutely not.

I said YANBU but not due to disorganisation - she will learn fast if she gets the consequences - because of the missed school and appointments.
I went to London on my own (not as far I know) at 17 and then to uni on the train on my own at 18.

I don't know why PPs are mentioning that she doesn't speak fluent Greek or is somewhere she "doesn't speak the language". Practically all Greeks in touristy areas speak English perfectly well (the only exception I've found are the elderly). Booking tickets won't be a problem in that respect but if she's never had to plan complicated (well not very but if you're inexperienced it'll seem it) journeys by public transport she may well struggle rather.

I'd be sticking firmly to "No dear, you've got appointments and a new term, you'll see X soon when they get back." They won't have booked a plane ticket for her going back, will they?

No way would I let her.

I agree with the OP, but km surprised there are not more dissenting views, as from people I know, 17 year olds are expected to be independent and enough to do this ok d of thing

Actually just read the other posts. It would still be a no from me.

I’ve got a dd she’s 17. That would be a no from me too. And I expect his family won’t want her gate crashing either.

Have you spoke to the family? Are they really egging her on, or is that what she saying, she’s hardly going tk say she’s not welcome.

No way. Travel with lots of connections is stressful at the best of times. Add not speaking the language, anxiety and zero life experience and it's the recipe for a nightmare.

Yeah she may ace it and it'll be an enriching experience but far more likely she's calling you at midnight crying when she misses the connection/can't find the entrance to the ferry/ doesn't know which bus stand to go to, not the BF parents.

The time she wanted to travel Greece alone to meet a boy will be a funny story when she's 40. Probably.

Has she much experience of public transport even in England?

Lol, Nice try from her. And I agree with pp, big old red flag from the bf and family encouraging her. Why doesn't he fly back to the UK to see her if he's so desperate? It would be quicker than the 6-hour trip she would have to take. Well done for being the only grown-up in the room.

Absolutely not. School would be the non negotiable anyway but the travel is so last minute and haphazard I couldn’t feel relaxed about if it were my kid. Does she even have a seat on their plane? (Regardless, I’d be putting my foot down and telling her there will be other opportunities when she is 18). Had it been a well thought holiday with his parents that would have been fine but not this

point out to her that if she is adult enough to travel alone, she is adult enough not to miss medical appointments

I tend to agree it’s not a great idea, but you don’t need to speak fluent Greek to deal with unexpected changes to travel plans, you just need the experience and nous to be able to manage it, and know what to do if there’s an unexpected cancellation. From what the OP has written, I don’t think she is mature enough to manage it.

I’ve used public transport in Greece with virtually no Greek, and I survived,
but I’m nearly 50 with many years experience.

I wojld say yes if she didnt have school and medical appointments. The travel woild be fine shes 17 but jist the school and appointments is not good to miss.

Missing school and the medical appointments would make it a no from me.

Obviously it's a terrible idea but pragmatically, how are you going to stop her?

Since she has anxiety and ADHD and all that jazz, is it likely that she will actually be able to plan and carry all this out without losing her bottle (or tickets, passport, purse etc)? Or will she sulk and flounce and probably feel relieved underneath that you said no she shouldn't?

I can see that to her, it probably sounds so romantic that she overcomes all adversity to fly to her beloved, but in reality she is better off waiting until next year when they can holiday together like adults.

Ok well that pressure from BF is a fucking massive red flag isn’t it.

Normally I would be quite relaxed about something like this. I stayed on with my friend, abroad at 16 (and locked ourselves out of the villa in only our bikinis, having to walk into the local bar, half naked to ask for help…😳😂)

However, your DD doesn't sound organised enough to be travelling independently. (says I!😂)
Currently, there is also research/data showing a high correlation between missing days during first week back at the start of the school year and persistent absence through the school year.
Absence in the first week disrupts early relationships, seating arrangements, understanding of organisation and lacks a sense of belonging, leaving the students adrift.

The travelling be fine with. I travelled at a young age.

But not missing school and medical appointments so I voted Yanbu.