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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

men on mumsnet

390 replies

LittleMi55Nobody · 05/09/2025 16:40

ladies..just wondering..are you fed up of men posting on mumsnet..why don't they start their own "dadsnet/mansnet" group..im getting fed up of obvious "male" comments undermining our woman issues....quite honestly id like them to fuck off cos im not interested in their opinons on womanship

OP posts:
Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:58

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:55

you can't answer the question basically.

It's called MUMsnet, so is only for MUMs - that's the argument. Interesting point.
No child-free midwife, no aunt, no sister...

If you have a fur baby, you are mum too I suppose? 😂

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Mumsnet has made it clear men are welcome. It’s for whoever they say it’s for.

DBSFstupid · 05/09/2025 19:58

JustForYouMyDear · 05/09/2025 16:45

I ignore them.

😂me too

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:57

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:48

So they should start engaging. Nobody has told them not to engage with dadsnet.

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Again. There is no ‘they’, when the users are separated individuals. Michael sitting at home posting on ‘night feeds’ to receive no comments cannot conjure up more users to reply to him. Daniel sitting at home posting on ‘child benefit advice’ and receiving no replies cannot conjure up engagement. Philip posting on ‘relationships’ on his commute cannot magic replies to his empty thread when no one is engaging.

These people are the ‘they’ and they can’t do anything about the disengagement.

Sadcafe · 05/09/2025 19:57

vinegarforeverything · 05/09/2025 16:43

Men always feel the need to intrude in to our spaces don't they. Decent men don't do it.

There is a Dadsnet but the interlopers prefer to make their voices heard here.

But the dadsnet forum is pretty rubbish in terms of the subjects it covers, maybe if it had the same range as mumsnet , it would be used more

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:55

Zov · 05/09/2025 19:53

This thread is not about that though is it?!! So away with your whataboutery!

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you can't answer the question basically.

It's called MUMsnet, so is only for MUMs - that's the argument. Interesting point.
No child-free midwife, no aunt, no sister...

If you have a fur baby, you are mum too I suppose? 😂

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:53

chachahide · 05/09/2025 19:45

Lot of men on this thread! It’s so obvious there are a lot more men on here over the last 5 years, it’s really changed.

The advent of chat gpt/question engines directs a lot more men and women to mumsnet now, I blame that!

would you mind explaining how you know that a poster is a man? On this thread specifically?

Or is it just anyone who disagrees with the OP, and having a different opinion can only come from a MALE, because #sisterhood, and none of us are able to have an original or different thought?

I am serious, how do you know who is a "man" on this thread?

Zov · 05/09/2025 19:53

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:51

you could be puzzled why people (sorry, WOMEN) with no children are on here too?

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This thread is not about that though is it?!! So away with your whataboutery!

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 05/09/2025 19:53

chachahide · 05/09/2025 19:45

Lot of men on this thread! It’s so obvious there are a lot more men on here over the last 5 years, it’s really changed.

The advent of chat gpt/question engines directs a lot more men and women to mumsnet now, I blame that!

Sure. Everyone who disagrees with you is a man.

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:51

Zov · 05/09/2025 19:48

This is what I think. I am neither here nor there with men being here (as long as they keep the patronising mansplaining (that some men do) to themselves, and don't start making sleazy remarks, or come out with the NAMALT shite! ) But I don't get WHY they want to be here.

My DH would never want to post on here, or even read the forums. LOL. No offence to Mumsnet or anyone here (I am a regular and have been for some time! And I love it here,) but he has zero interest in being on Mumsnet.

I do genuinely find it odd that men want to be here to be honest. JMHO. And I don't think it's unreasonable to be puzzled as to why men are here (or even be annoyed by it.)

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you could be puzzled why people (sorry, WOMEN) with no children are on here too?

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:50

BlueJuniper94 · 05/09/2025 19:41

Mumsnet? I dunno

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why are you not complaining against non-mums being on the forum then?

At least be consistent.

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:48

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:47

Yet disengagement leads to disengagement, it’s the way socialisation works, especially online. So no, as individual users, they cannot form a group with only disengagement to work with.

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So they should start engaging. Nobody has told them not to engage with dadsnet.

Zov · 05/09/2025 19:48

BlueJuniper94 · 05/09/2025 19:41

Mumsnet? I dunno

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Exactly. 😆 What a batshit question from @BluePearOntheRocks 😂

Zov · 05/09/2025 19:48

IJustCantStayAway · 05/09/2025 18:11

I don’t really care one way or the other BUT I always think it a little bit weird a man would post on a site called Mumsnet.

This is what I think. I am neither here nor there with men being here (as long as they keep the patronising mansplaining (that some men do) to themselves, and don't start making sleazy remarks, or come out with the NAMALT shite! ) But I don't get WHY they want to be here.

My DH would never want to post on here, or even read the forums. LOL. No offence to Mumsnet or anyone here (I am a regular and have been for some time! And I love it here,) but he has zero interest in being on Mumsnet.

I do genuinely find it odd that men want to be here to be honest. JMHO. And I don't think it's unreasonable to be puzzled as to why men are here (or even be annoyed by it.)

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:47

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:27

Of course they can. A collection of individuals become a group. If none of them ever bother, of course it can't become a group.

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Yet disengagement leads to disengagement, it’s the way socialisation works, especially online. So no, as individual users, they cannot form a group with only disengagement to work with.

chachahide · 05/09/2025 19:45

Lot of men on this thread! It’s so obvious there are a lot more men on here over the last 5 years, it’s really changed.

The advent of chat gpt/question engines directs a lot more men and women to mumsnet now, I blame that!

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:44

BlueJuniper94 · 05/09/2025 19:41

Mumsnet? I dunno

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Oh bbbbut Justine said....

BlueJuniper94 · 05/09/2025 19:41

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 17:39

what exactly made you believe this forum had anything to do with "women" specifically?

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Mumsnet? I dunno

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:31

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:16

Mumsnet has never really been for "parents" though has it? Whatever the tagline says, it's called mumsnet. They knew exactly who they were targeting and they knew who really uses it.
Utter bollocks that it's a "parents" forum. It's always been a women's forum in reality.

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so your idea is to ban men from parenting forums, because it's a "women issue".
Brilliant, that's progress.

Proves the point, I doubt women could come up with this kind of crap, that sounds straight from the mouth of one of these "women-hating male" we hear so much about.

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 05/09/2025 19:30

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:16

Mumsnet has never really been for "parents" though has it? Whatever the tagline says, it's called mumsnet. They knew exactly who they were targeting and they knew who really uses it.
Utter bollocks that it's a "parents" forum. It's always been a women's forum in reality.

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It's always been a majority women's forum. It's never been an exclusively women's one. Justine et al have repeatedly made it clear that that's how they want it to be

You might not like what the tagline says but it's there because the owners of the site want it to be there.

BluePearOntheRocks · 05/09/2025 19:27

londongirl12 · 05/09/2025 19:05

I don’t like men here either. I feel like it should be a safe space for women. Men don’t need to intrude, hence the name Mumsnet! (And before anyone starts, no you don’t need to be a mum. But a woman!)

Edited

If you honestly believe an anonymous internet forum, with possibly million of users around the world, is a "safe space" for anyone, you really should get off the internet

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:27

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:24

Yes but as individuals they cannot make any difference to the group popularity of a website . ‘They’ as a group can’t do anything about its lack of usership.

I said you have to put up with it OR move on. And if you choose not to move on of course you have to put up with it, because no mater how much you complain, it will still happen. Complaining is neither here nor there.

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Of course they can. A collection of individuals become a group. If none of them ever bother, of course it can't become a group.

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 05/09/2025 19:26

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:09

By "do it" I meant populate their own parenting forum. Women are the lifeblood of mumsnet, whatever the tagline may be.
If you think it is oh so easy, why haven't the men managed to populate a parenting forum of their own?
That's not a rhetorical question.

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Possibly because this is a patriarchal society where child-rearing is seen as a predominantly female role. As a consequence good/busy parenting sites tend to have a heavy bias towards women.

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:25

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:16

Mumsnet has never really been for "parents" though has it? Whatever the tagline says, it's called mumsnet. They knew exactly who they were targeting and they knew who really uses it.
Utter bollocks that it's a "parents" forum. It's always been a women's forum in reality.

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Men are still welcome, regardless of how you interpret the usership or what the main demographic is.

Didimum · 05/09/2025 19:24

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:03

They as in all the dad's who aren't using dadsnet. Of course they're a group of individuals, that is exactly what groups are. Individuals can display similar patterns of behavior.
And actually we don't have to put up with it or move on. We can stick around and complain if we want to.

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Yes but as individuals they cannot make any difference to the group popularity of a website . ‘They’ as a group can’t do anything about its lack of usership.

I said you have to put up with it OR move on. And if you choose not to move on of course you have to put up with it, because no mater how much you complain, it will still happen. Complaining is neither here nor there.

Digdongdoo · 05/09/2025 19:16

TinyTempest · 05/09/2025 19:12

They are populating their own parenting forum 😳

Mumsnet is for parents (and non parents) whether you like it or not.

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Mumsnet has never really been for "parents" though has it? Whatever the tagline says, it's called mumsnet. They knew exactly who they were targeting and they knew who really uses it.
Utter bollocks that it's a "parents" forum. It's always been a women's forum in reality.