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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask you to tell me what I already know… (a LTB Situation)

30 replies

LeopardPrintIsNeutral · 05/09/2025 14:17

It’s time to LTB.
in various incarnations over the last twelve years I’ve posted on mumsnet about “D”H

He doesn’t work
He throws all my stuff away
wont let me have a glass of wine
he is constantly angry at me
forced me into an abortion several years ago that absolutely ruined me
wont let me sleep in my own bed
gets mad if I give him change instead of cash
wont let me buy things for DD
has thrown things in anger in the past
ETC etc

BUT
The icing on the cake.
He’s started calling DD a “dickhead” and “a little bitch”
Ive called him out on it, and he’s just said “if she’s being a dickhead, I’m going to call her a dickhead” SHES FIVE!!! 😭😭😭
she swears in context at things and people and then says but daddy said it. “I’m so pissed at you” or “you fucking chicken” it’s actually sickening.

i don’t know how to get out of this. I will have to give him half of everything and I have literally nothing but the house which is shared ownership anyway. I’ve got absolutely no idea where to start and I just feel so sick and sad and scared. And I don’t know what to do. 😭😭😭

I know this is AIBU but please please be kind to me.

OP posts:
Largestlegocollectionever · 05/09/2025 14:21

Can you not get women’s aid, police, social services, school involved?
Anyone who will help protect you and DD against this abusive man?

SliceofTosst · 05/09/2025 14:21

You know what you need to do. Do you want DD to think this is the norm?

He's the dickhead. Just get rid.

CC222 · 05/09/2025 14:20

All these financial losses you’re worried about are a small price to pay to protect your child from childhood trauma! Please get rid of him. See a solicitor and see where you stand so you can start making a plan.
All this is doing is teaching her the kind of behaviour she should tolerate from partners when she grows up. Save her from this abusive toxic environment, please

Threepeaks2025 · 05/09/2025 14:19

Do you work OP?

Generaltwat · 05/09/2025 14:19

All you can do is bite the bullet and get rid of him.

Once you've done the first step, the rest will be a breeze.

Good luck OP. Please do chuck him -he sounds dreadful. Think of your DD