Friends judging my side business because I’m a high earner

Don't tell them any more about it. By far the most effective way to stop people throwing negative vibes your way. It's a shame but sometimes it's for the best.

If you ever see a 'friend' smile when you tell them something didn't work out for you, it changes how you move through the world. I'm about to try something that no one knows about. I watch YouTube videos of people doing the thing I'm interested in. I use that for motivation instead of seeking it in others. Once it's up and running I may share but I might not.

Hope it works out for you ❤

I'm sooooo rich all my friends are jealous. Sad face - what did I do wrong.

There's nothing wrong at all with wanting to have a commercial side hustle while you're in that sort of job. I suspect you don't want to do the stressful but lucrative job forever, and would like to build up a Plan B that you enjoy, and that makes enough money for you to live on without being at your current level, to move into in future - is that right?
If you present it that way, friends may understand more that it's not about greed.

Your husband is right and I’d also be looking at what they bring to your life and whether they are proper friends or just “friends”

I hope your mood improves and you have a better day tomorrow.

Talk about getting snippy. You go and enjoy getting randomly defensive just because you're embarrassed you got it wrong – knock yourself out. Read posts properly next time and you won't get confused.

Yes, like lots of people "I'm not racist but..." You're coming across snippy to me.

I've said YABU, but for the following reason: if you don't need the extra money, and aren't planning on giving up your main job and having this be your only income, I'd be wary of turning something I enjoy into job. Keep enjoying it as something you choose to do when you want to, rather than something that has an element of obligation to it.

I literally said with respect and that I wasn't intending to be argumentative. And I didn't say 'you don't have to understand', I said 'no one has to understand'.

My brother is a partner in his firm and on high six-figures. He takes whatever annual leave he likes. My DH is also on six-figs and gets 35 days leave – plus bank holidays.

Well said. Imagine being on that shite a wage someone’s success upsets you

OP all I can say is that you have weird friends. Why is it their business why you choose to do what you do?

Well it felt patronising: "you don't have to understand." Good to know you didn't mean it that way.

Do you keep moaning about lack of time / lack of time spent with the children, being incredibly stressted and busy etc?
If you are doing that and then suddenly announcing that you are adding something else to the plate, then I would also question why you were doing it, if I was your friend. Based on the assumption that you can't do any less of the financially necessary job and the parenting, so if you are stretched for time already, then why would you do that to yourself. That is what I would be thinking if I was your friend. But if you clearly have time to do it all, then no issue, but I wouldn't be very sympathetic to your complaining about stress/business/lack of time.

@BananaPeanutToast painting dog portraits is really popular isnt it?

Nah. If you can create money doing something you enjoy and build a following network and earn money why not. As an example People on YouTube enjoy doing make up etc but earn money. Build an empire make your mark. Be authentically yourself.

I don't understand why you need their 'support'?

It's YOUR passion, interest and hobby, so you enjoy it. You will not be depending on this venture for the roof over your head, and can presumably absorb any small losses you make, so there is no risk.

Do you often talk to them (aka ask for 'support') about the stress involved in your day job? They may be concerned that you are adding to your stress and will be expecting further support for it.

You want to do it because it is your passion - that's great! Do it and enjoy it. You don't need validation or support from your friends.

one friend made a slightly judgy comment about the amount of holidays we’ve been on this summer

So you're both on 6 figure salaries, but you can get multiple annual leave holidays over the summer? Nah.

Yes ... I guess that explains me sharing my thoughts also? You said you couldn't understand something, so I am providing examples of why.

Having a side hustle is sensible, you never know what can happen with your primary job and you could be very glad of your passion project to fall back on or bridge a gap at some point.

I don't see how you can know they're sneering at the idea because you are a high earner? You say you don't discuss money with them so maybe they don't care about that side of things.

I don't consider what wages all my friends take home. What difference would it make to me or my value of the friendship?

It would more likely be that they don't find it interesting, they don't want to have to buy stuff off you, or they don't think you'll make a lot of money or have success with it.

If only you'd tell us what it is. You needn't be shy, if you're trying to launch a business you should be confident to share it. There's no way on earth that any hobby/business idea could be outing.

Do you have kids?

I admit that I would judge you if you’re choosing to work FT and then having a second job when you don’t need to.

If you don’t have kids then I wouldn’t judge but I would just assume you’re a bit bored with life and want something to fill your time.
Those of us with kids don’t have much free time and so it’s quite foreign to us and so if your friends have kids and you don’t, they won’t understand that you’re bored and want to fill your free time.

Eternally poor person mentality. You're just as bad as OP's 'friends'.

Well that doesn’t fit with your thread title.

It's a thread about why her friends are "judging", so the OP does want to understand their thoughts. That's why people are sharing, including me.