To be putoff intimacy with DP due to this?

Apart from the fact it’s gross because yes we can wipe but it won’t smell fresh, if a female has a poo then has sex there’s an increased chance of a bladder infection, not worth the risk

Oh come on.

Flannel/wash rag.

Do you not possess bathroom cleaner to wash your sink?

I don’t think it’s hygienic if you use the sink to wash your face and brush your teeth.
but logistically I don’t understand, how do you wash your bum at the sink? Surely you must take your full bottom half off to avoid getting items wet, then is this just using hands? And then using the hand towel😬? The floor would be soaking
if you only have your top left on isn’t it surely quicker to get in the shower

Never had a quick wash? EVER? Face, arm pits, genitals/bum?

I mean, it isn't as good as a shower but it's better than not.

It's referred to as a 'whore's wash' for obvious reasons.

Me too- the sink is for washing my face, hands and brushing my teeth.

What? Why is this a problem?

No I had no idea anyone did this!
I shower once a day, very occasionally twice if needed
I only use my sink to wash my hands and my face

If it was a case of your downstairs or something watching tv or similar and he pops to the loo then after you both go to bed I wouldn’t be bothered.
But if you have to use a smelly loo immediately after him , I’d be annoyed he didn’t go earlier. Or if you are literally both getting in bed and you have to lay andwait until he shits to dtd yes that would bother me.

Other than showering that is literally what the bathroom is for. Do you never strip wash?

Haha! You think you are so funny. If you are so dumb that you have to ask, then I can't be bothered to answer.

I get it that its offputting. But, if he cleans himself up thoroughly and because you are ttc, you are intending to just have a quickie or just regular sex, then I would be okay with that. I would feel a bit yucky doing oral or anything where my face was around his bottom unless he had a proper shower though.

I guess I must be a grubby maggot then. Who’s joining me in the grubby maggot club? 🐛

I can tell not many people have been in a relationship with a man from a Muslim country!

My ex husband wouldn’t dream of having sex unless he’d had a shower, I’m pretty sure he expected me to model myself on his behaviour. This was different if it was spontaneous but then you don’t have time to consider these things. If OP is literally waiting for her DH whilst he curls on out then it’s going to be on her mind isn’t it?! I hope the smell is contained.

All the men I’ve dated/married from Muslim countries (more than the average person I suspect, I definitely have a type!) wash their bums after pooing and I have to admit that I do appreciate it.

My current DP of 13 years has had to use toilet paper on occasion (when we are out or go away) rather than washing and says he just feels itchy and unclean afterwards. I tried to use a lota (bum washing jug) as I liked the idea of how much more hygienic it is but now we have a bum gun. I just couldn’t use the lota as it requires a lot of dexterity, my DP was taught how to use it as a child - I just flooded our bathroom 😂.

I am used to these kinds of discussions because people are often curious and ask DP about his bum washing (left hand only !) when they see his hygiene equipment in our bathroom. I did insist in introducing soap though which I know a lot of Muslims don’t bother with and just use water. I said if you aren’t going to use soap you are just splashing poo particles around with water.

DP also has a portable bum washer now but I stick to wet wipes. After several years of this I couldn’t go back to loo roll myself as it just doesn’t feel clean.

I think OP’s main issue (but who knows as she hasn’t returned 🤔) is knowing that her DP is doing a “squeeze n splash” before the jiggy jiggy. It’s not very sexy or much of a turn on to be aroused and ready for sex and your DH to declare he’s dropping the twins at the pool whilst you lie in bed and wait for him to finish.

A huge majority of people know roughly when they are going to have a bowel movement, I don’t understand why if they are TTC that they can’t avoid having sex around the time her DH usually shits?

This is unless he’s one of these mythical creatures I’ve heard about who can shit on command. If that’s the case then I wouldn’t be happy about him factoring having a shit into foreplay 🥴.

We all poo but it’s the last thing I want to be thinking about before sex.
I know some people are different and have a fetish, I’m starting to wonder about the OP who has literally dropped and ran.

Same here 😂😂

I'm with you...does no one have spontaneous middle of the night sex!? It would kill the mood for me to hop out of bed to shower.

Why?!

Same here!

And yep, I always - without exception - wash my privates and all around there before sex. Always. If we're planning sex that is part of the plan, if it is unplanned I will just get up when foreplay starts and say just going to have a wash, and he does the same. You don't have to shower but you DO have to wash with soap and water - unless you're a grubby maggot of course.

If we're having sex outside and there's nowhere to wash and nobody is putting their mouth down there, fair enough. It's been a few years since that's happened, but yeah that is the only instance I would just go for it without washing first.

Like literally....but she's "minding" his there...see what I did there? No?, I will see myself out...

Is it that he doesn't (or you don't trust him to) wash properly, or you would still be put off by the timing even if he were showering or properly using a bidet afterwards? If it's the former, then he doesn't need to understand why you're bothered, or feel that he himself would be bothered in a similar situation, in order to start washing thoroughly in between. In addition to wanting his partner to be well, comfortable, and attracted, it'd also be in his best interests to wash thoroughly in between shitting and sex if that's key to, erm, actually having sex at all.

It's definitely a thing between toilet and sex, yes. Anything else is 🤢

In all my decades, I’ve never showered after a poo, unless I do a poo immediately before when my planned shower would be. I’ve never specifically showered before sex either. I would shower if I was doing a good stretch of hard yakka heavy gardening or something where I get dirty/sweaty (and then I don’t shower that morning knowing I’m going to get sweaty/dirty and would just be showering again after), but then it’s after I wrap up the dirty activity, not because I’m having sex. No guy has ever complained😀.

If he's expecting OP to go down there unwashed, then it's very much her business...

I would love to know how to schedule a shit for a more convenient time. Seriously I would.

Also you couldn't give them a BJ without a shower as he might have faeces on his penis and testicles , what man would expect that ?