To expect her to sniff him?!

This is the second or third thread I’ve seen about nurseries not meeting toileting needs eg nappies or taking toddlers to the toilet and then I saw a thread saying parents are negligent as so many dc start reception in nappies

This happened to my little one a few months back.

I trusted the nursery as he’d been there 7 months or so with no issues. They offered to change him every hour which unfortunately didn’t solve the problem.

I suggested providing them with the wipes and cream I use at home and over night the problem stopped and there has been no further issues in 4 months.

It was merely my son having a reaction to the specific wipes the nursery uses.

It might be worth trying.

Why does she need to sniff him to check if he has a wet or dirty bum? There are other ways to check.

So instead of sorting the nursery whose causing tbe problem you choose to punish your mum? Odd.

If Ops mum doesn’t want to follow precautions to check him for basic toddler care, she shouldn’t be asking for solo time with DS.

If my child was getting bad nappy rash on more than one occasion, he'd be moving nursery asap.

Why are you concerned about your mother and not the nursery?

You need to address the actual nappy rash from the nursery rather than the imagined future nappy rash from your mum

Stewing on your mother, who is caring for your child presumably out of love for her grandchild and the Op rather than money, rather than… the nursery who is patently negligent.

shakes head and wanders off

Ha! I read the OP as having a 2yo son, not that it was her second son. People seem to slip between the two on here (numbers in brackets meaning either age or position of sibling). When she said toddler in the OP, I assumed I must be right that he was 2yo, rather than her second child.

Assuming there’s not some drip feed coming and actually she’s lost her sense of smell due to long covid then a toddler’s poo is detectable at quite some distance. She doesn’t need to stick her face at his bum. She can also look periodically if she wants. And due to the rash you could also ask her to change every 2 hours for wet or whatever you want so long as you’re providing enough nappies. Either you trust or you don’t and frankly it’s really bizarre thing to be hung up on. Nursery is a separate issue though and I hope you find a solution there.

Right so mum sniff his bum and get a faceful of urine or poop smell - no thanks not from me you can tell by patting the nappy etc - if he is being changed regularly in her care you are being unreasonable as its not in her care there is a problem

Jesus OP!! Ffs you simply can’t expect other people to randomly sniff your child’s arse!!

Your mum can simply ‘have a peep’ at a safe enough ‘nose to arse’ distance that would NOT require her to sniff shit!!

I despair sometimes!

There are other ways to check if a baby needs a nappy change. YABU

There are other ways to check if a baby needs a nappy change. YABU

Raise your complaint again with the nursery manager and ask their ideas on how to resolve this. (ask around to see if any other parents have the same issue)

Ask your mum what other suggestions she has for checking if the nappy needs changing when he's at her home and how she proposes to make sure that he doesn't get nappy rash after being there.

If he develops nappy rash after being with her, let her know and ask that it doesn't happen again. If it keeps on, find alternative. That way you have asked her to pay attention to it and given her a chance to do so, but you can't let the situation continue.

If the nursery doesn't respond. Take it further.. ( Someone on here will have advice about nursery regulations)

I wouldn't be putting my nose anywhere near human shit and piss, either.

Seriously, just because it comes out of your precious child, that doesn't mean it's any different from any other human excrement. It's literally the same substance that comes out of an adult, and asking other people to sniff at it is fucking disgusting.

Can’t she just check his nappy? Does she have to sniff in an approved way?

If I'd put my nose any closer to the last nappy I changed, It would have stripped my nasal lining! 😷

It's been a while... but isn't wee just as bad for nappy rash as poo? So just change regularly.

Surely just a quick prod of the nappy will tell you whether it needs to be changed or not if it’s full of wee.
if sniffing for a poo, that’s usually pretty bloody obvious and shouldn’t need to get too close to figure that out

Comprehension is not your strong point.

Personally I never did the sniff. I just checked by touch / visual check. The sniff thing grossed me out.

Do you mean to smell if he's done a poo? Surely she can look down the back of his nappy? If it's for wees, you can feel how saturated the nappy is by giving it a bit of a squeeze.

First baby, huh?