Page 3 | Don’t want Dh to start getting home from work earlier

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 2025-09-03T15:08:55+00:00

Dh used to get home from work around 6 onwards, in summer they’ve been going into work earlier and arriving home earlier at 4.30, due to the heat. They’ve all decided they prefer this at his workplace and will stick with these hours. I pick Dd, 6 up from school and am home for 3.30, I really used to enjoy this time for just us, we’d have a snack and cuddle up together on the sofa, read books, watch tv and chat, we’d then maybe play for a bit, take the dog for a walk, then i’d get dinner ready later. It just takes this away with Dh arriving not long after, changes the dynamic At weekends we’re all home and also she’s at friends houses or has friends around Aibu to be sad at missing this quiet time just for us?

Ddakji · 04/09/2025 16:03

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 16:02

Ok, you have no idea!

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Why not give people an idea, then?

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 16:02

Leaningtowerofpisa · 04/09/2025 15:47

Very sad you think like this about your DH. Many women would love to have a husband back early to be around. He is a parent aswell and deserves to also enjoy family time. Perhaps you need to realise a child benefits from quality time with both parents. Instead of a workaholic husband rocking in at 10 pm you have one that is in time for tea/ dinner. In my view , the children will remember that and if I was you I’d encourage them and him to have time alone on some of those days too.

I hope you realise aswell that it’s not just your interests that are important but what is good all round

Ok, you have no idea!

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Leaningtowerofpisa · 04/09/2025 15:47

Very sad you think like this about your DH. Many women would love to have a husband back early to be around. He is a parent aswell and deserves to also enjoy family time. Perhaps you need to realise a child benefits from quality time with both parents. Instead of a workaholic husband rocking in at 10 pm you have one that is in time for tea/ dinner. In my view , the children will remember that and if I was you I’d encourage them and him to have time alone on some of those days too.

I hope you realise aswell that it’s not just your interests that are important but what is good all round

notacooldad · 04/09/2025 14:56

Yep, I keep reminding myself that once they're both teenagers they won't want to spend any time with me at all, so I'm trying to make the most of it!
Thats not necessarily true.
Our teens spent loads of time with us going to gigs, restaurants, sporting events theatre cinema, skiing, hiking, climbing, mountain biking, motorbiking wild camping etc. Now they are in their 20s , nothing has changed except their girlfriends join in with us which is great.

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:34

namechangetheworld · 04/09/2025 13:34

Yep, I keep reminding myself that once they're both teenagers they won't want to spend any time with me at all, so I'm trying to make the most of it!

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Same ❤️

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namechangetheworld · 04/09/2025 13:34

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:31

So nice isn’t it 😊 I know it won’t always be like this

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Yep, I keep reminding myself that once they're both teenagers they won't want to spend any time with me at all, so I'm trying to make the most of it!

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:33

lnks · 04/09/2025 13:26

It seems that sorejaws has form

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Usually the way 🙄

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:32

Marble10 · 04/09/2025 13:22

I get it. When you’ve had a routine for so long, it’s just the way it is. Mine comes home around 9pm and if he now did a 9-5 I would hate the change of routine and having him here every night. It’s more chilled out when me and DC. They have my full attention whereas when DH is here my attention is diverted

Not every father is this fun bubbly father dying to get stuck in with chores and child duties

Exactly this, much more chilled when just us

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:31

namechangetheworld · 04/09/2025 13:20

I completely understand OP. I really enjoy lazy Saturday mornings alone with my DDs, playing board games, doing crafts, just the stuff we don't have time for in the week with the rush of school and clubs. I'm always secretly a bit miffed if DH decides to come back from work early. Sometimes it's nice to have that 121 time.

The posts sneering at you are from people bitter about the fact you work part-time and they don't. It happens on any thread where a poster dares to work less than 40 hours a week.

Edited

So nice isn’t it 😊 I know it won’t always be like this

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:31

Harrysmummy246 · 04/09/2025 13:20

If she is diagnosed with ADHD, surely you can realise how important that ability to be active is for her regulation?

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She has plenty of activity for regulation and also needs and responds well to this quiet time, she’s always her calmest and regulated during these times

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Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:28

Harrysmummy246 · 04/09/2025 13:22

So this is really a husband/ marriage/ him not necessarily being the dad you deem he should be problem ?

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Exactly

lnks · 04/09/2025 13:26

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:13

Awful isn’t it? Must have a sad, lonely life, worse than mine even. To come on a thread when someone is upset and cruelly take the piss

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It seems that sorejaws has form

Harrysmummy246 · 04/09/2025 13:22

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:09

She will almost have to beg him to…sometimes he does

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So this is really a husband/ marriage/ him not necessarily being the dad you deem he should be problem ?

Marble10 · 04/09/2025 13:22

I get it. When you’ve had a routine for so long, it’s just the way it is. Mine comes home around 9pm and if he now did a 9-5 I would hate the change of routine and having him here every night. It’s more chilled out when me and DC. They have my full attention whereas when DH is here my attention is diverted

Not every father is this fun bubbly father dying to get stuck in with chores and child duties

Harrysmummy246 · 04/09/2025 13:20

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 03/09/2025 22:55

She’s less calm, wants to play with him or out for a bike ride with him etc, she has adhd and is pretty hyper and all over the place, her calmest and when we’re able to connect is when it’s just us I suppose

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If she is diagnosed with ADHD, surely you can realise how important that ability to be active is for her regulation?

namechangetheworld · 04/09/2025 13:20

I completely understand OP. I really enjoy lazy Saturday mornings alone with my DDs, playing board games, doing crafts, just the stuff we don't have time for in the week with the rush of school and clubs. I'm always secretly a bit miffed if DH decides to come back from work early. Sometimes it's nice to have that 121 time.

The posts sneering at you are from people bitter about the fact you work part-time and they don't. It happens on any thread where a poster dares to work less than 40 hours a week.

Harrysmummy246 · 04/09/2025 13:18

That time will change anyway (as mum of an 8yo, once he's had a snack, I'm rarely 'required'
I would think it would be good to spend time as the three of you or DH spend that quality time with her ? (DS has really enjoyed setting up and playing board games with both of us lately)

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:17

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:09

She will almost have to beg him to…sometimes he does

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He sounds pretty horrible op

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:14

Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:13

Awful isn’t it? Must have a sad, lonely life, worse than mine even. To come on a thread when someone is upset and cruelly take the piss

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Is your life really bad then if you say “worse than mine”?

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:14

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:13

lnks · 04/09/2025 13:10

Are you always such as dick?

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Awful isn’t it? Must have a sad, lonely life, worse than mine even. To come on a thread when someone is upset and cruelly take the piss

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lnks · 04/09/2025 13:10

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Are you always such as dick?

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:09

PamIsAVolleyballChamp · 04/09/2025 10:42

But you said that he and dd will go outside and.play/bike and she loves it?

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She will almost have to beg him to…sometimes he does

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Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 13:07

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Alltheladshaveweirdhaircutsthesedays · 04/09/2025 13:06

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Her friend is here playing as they often are weekends and holidays as I previously said

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