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Original poster

Would you be angry at this? Someone calm me down

161 replies

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 12:25

So I have some concerns about my DS’s health, I have done an e-consult to the GP awaiting a reply. So over the holidays i’ve been noticing frequent urination, thirst during the night, getting up to pee during the night which he never used to, verrucas on his feet that wont budge and nausea. I am concerned about diabetes. I have been working alot over the summer and have told relevant babysitters of my concerns. I informed MIL to cut back on sweets/cakes/no fizzy drinks etc, which in all fairness she seemed very concerned and said “yes well youll have to watch his diet” I went to pick DS up after work yesterday, to see a bottle of fanta in front of him, 2 large slabs of cake on his plate, and MIL forcing another one down him! I reminded her of our conversation and her response was “he will have what he likes here!” I have had a number of conversations with her before this about the amount of cakes/pop etc she gives them, she agrees to my face, but I always turn up to find fizzy drinks/ sweets in excess in front of DS! I am fairly laid back about this sort of thing, fizzy drinks is a treat only and sweet stuff all in moderation. I feel so angry at mil for disregarding DS’s health. Luckily DS is back in school so no need to be in MIL’s care.

OP posts:
Threepeaks2025 · 05/09/2025 06:29

First thing I would have done after noticing the symptoms you describe is go to a pharmacy or even Amazon and buy a urine glucose testing strip and monitor him. Amazon has them and they are cheap. Glad the GP is seeing him my GP lets you go in and ask for a urine dipstick test whenever you want one.

Your MIL is crazy giving 3 big slabs of cake and a Fanta drink!

BessieSurtees · 05/09/2025 06:27

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 13:14

Erm… where on EARTH does it say i have not done anything. He his due GP call back today. His symptoms have been noticeable but inconsistent! Can be put down to the excessive hot weather we have had , noticeable YES but nothing to SCREAM at me “OMG diabetes!” It is when he began getting up to wee at night which only started 2 nights ago did I say “Ok, hnmm” this needs to be looked at.

And yet here you are screaming that your MIL (who is providing childcare) gave him cake and fizzy pop. "OK Hmm" do you think that will make much difference if he is Type 1 (or 2 even) and you only thought it needed addressing 2 days ago? How old is he?

Lilactimes · 05/09/2025 05:38

Lilactimes · 05/09/2025 05:35

When I thought my DC was diabetic, I phoned my doctors and they admitted him that day and did a urine test and then full bloods the day after. This was last summer. They treated it with extreme urgency and we knew within a couple of days.
If you’re concerned, I would try to get a urine test asap at the doctors. I walked into the GOs and spoke I person to the receptionist and started to cry and they fit me in that day.
Hope he’s ok - good luck.
your MIL sounds awful feeding him that after you expressing concern but if he is type 1 diabetic you need to know asap as he will need insulin.

Show quote history

Oh sorry - should have read more of your posts. Glad he’s getting seen to and hope he’s ok.

Lilactimes · 05/09/2025 05:35

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 12:25

So I have some concerns about my DS’s health, I have done an e-consult to the GP awaiting a reply. So over the holidays i’ve been noticing frequent urination, thirst during the night, getting up to pee during the night which he never used to, verrucas on his feet that wont budge and nausea. I am concerned about diabetes. I have been working alot over the summer and have told relevant babysitters of my concerns. I informed MIL to cut back on sweets/cakes/no fizzy drinks etc, which in all fairness she seemed very concerned and said “yes well youll have to watch his diet” I went to pick DS up after work yesterday, to see a bottle of fanta in front of him, 2 large slabs of cake on his plate, and MIL forcing another one down him! I reminded her of our conversation and her response was “he will have what he likes here!” I have had a number of conversations with her before this about the amount of cakes/pop etc she gives them, she agrees to my face, but I always turn up to find fizzy drinks/ sweets in excess in front of DS! I am fairly laid back about this sort of thing, fizzy drinks is a treat only and sweet stuff all in moderation. I feel so angry at mil for disregarding DS’s health. Luckily DS is back in school so no need to be in MIL’s care.

When I thought my DC was diabetic, I phoned my doctors and they admitted him that day and did a urine test and then full bloods the day after. This was last summer. They treated it with extreme urgency and we knew within a couple of days.
If you’re concerned, I would try to get a urine test asap at the doctors. I walked into the GOs and spoke I person to the receptionist and started to cry and they fit me in that day.
Hope he’s ok - good luck.
your MIL sounds awful feeding him that after you expressing concern but if he is type 1 diabetic you need to know asap as he will need insulin.

Wearingmycrown · 05/09/2025 04:31

Tell your partner to have a word. However, you need to prioritise your son getting a diagnosis or hopefully rhe all clear. Is he thirsty despite having a drink, what is he drinking (could he be addicted to fizzy pop?) demand tests to be done, my friend had to really play up for a diagnosis & when they eventually tested her she was called up and told to go to the hospital was given a ward & was admitted straight in so they could treat her.

falalalalaaaaaaaa · 05/09/2025 04:17

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 13:21

So gp called and he is being taken down today

Show quote history

Did you get any answers in the end, OP? T1 here and our boy is too. Definitely symptoms that need checking out. Hope he was able to be seen and you have some answers soon Flowers

99bottlesofkombucha · 05/09/2025 03:53

Enterusername111333 · 03/09/2025 13:47

No? If he has T1 he'll be on insulin and once everyone knows what they are doing he can eat what he wants with his carb to insulin ratios.

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In a few years you mean… that’s how long it often takes to get comfortable. I know parents who two years after diagnosis would be in at midnight to test their child on summer holidays because of the extra energy kids use at the beach.

BeAzureRaven · 05/09/2025 01:33

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 12:25

So I have some concerns about my DS’s health, I have done an e-consult to the GP awaiting a reply. So over the holidays i’ve been noticing frequent urination, thirst during the night, getting up to pee during the night which he never used to, verrucas on his feet that wont budge and nausea. I am concerned about diabetes. I have been working alot over the summer and have told relevant babysitters of my concerns. I informed MIL to cut back on sweets/cakes/no fizzy drinks etc, which in all fairness she seemed very concerned and said “yes well youll have to watch his diet” I went to pick DS up after work yesterday, to see a bottle of fanta in front of him, 2 large slabs of cake on his plate, and MIL forcing another one down him! I reminded her of our conversation and her response was “he will have what he likes here!” I have had a number of conversations with her before this about the amount of cakes/pop etc she gives them, she agrees to my face, but I always turn up to find fizzy drinks/ sweets in excess in front of DS! I am fairly laid back about this sort of thing, fizzy drinks is a treat only and sweet stuff all in moderation. I feel so angry at mil for disregarding DS’s health. Luckily DS is back in school so no need to be in MIL’s care.

That's SOO disrespectful and boundary crossing. I wouldn't let my child go there again. If she is of normal mental status, she appears to care nothing about her own grandson's well being, Awful.

Redragtoabull · 05/09/2025 00:11

Enterusername111333 · 03/09/2025 13:18

You said you've been concerned over the summer and enough to ask people lookong after him to avoid seeets yet didnt think a test would be a good start? Yeah you need to get the poor and I hope for everyone it's something else.

Huh?

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 04/09/2025 23:42

Autumnscoming1 · 03/09/2025 13:21

So gp called and he is being taken down today

Show quote history

Best of luck OP, I hope it is nothing serious but better safe than sorry, hope he's OK.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 04/09/2025 23:39

Enterusername111333 · 03/09/2025 13:05

If you suspect diabetes you are putting his life at risk by not getting him tested and faffing about telling people not to give him cake. No level of avoid sugar will help. Go to GP now, today!

Sorry OP but I think people saying get him tested asap are right.

Deal with MIL later.

Even if he doesn't have it... he could develop type 2 or be prediabets on the kind of food MIL is giving him.

Send her the invoice for his next dental appointment (with a letter from dentist saying they recommend he doesn't have fizzy drinks etc) and see if that shuts her up.

She's ignorant, irresponsible and determined to undermine you, and unlikely to change. "He'll eat what he likes here." which is one thing, but when it literally affects your son's health it means she's not suitable to be in charge of him unsupervised.

But none of that matters, all the symptom's you've described means you are not over reacting by taking him to the gp hope it goes well.

Eggybreadwithnuts · 04/09/2025 23:23

@Autumnscoming1 how did you get on OP

babyproblems · 04/09/2025 23:20

YANBU. You don’t say how old he is but I wouldn’t let anyone look after my kid who gives them Fanta before the age of about 15!!! I’m very anti UPF and dizzy drinks so I appreciate others may think that’s extreme but I’ll do almost anything to avoid my kids starting a fizzy drinks habit. I won’t even let someone drink it out of the can / bottle in their presence. If she’s crap on that I’d be questioning her capabilities tbh.

KaitlynnFairchild · 04/09/2025 23:02

There is a lot of misinformation on this thread.

I hope your DS does not have diabetes OP.

YourLemonTiger · 04/09/2025 22:50

housebrick · 04/09/2025 22:42

My, adult, daughter was diagnosed, out of the blue, with T1 diabetes. She was just off 30.

No specific symptoms but thirst, weight loss, general feeling of unwellness.

In some respects she is lucky - those diagnosed earlier have a head start on those accompanying life affecting ailments.

One of the most shocking for me was when I gave her a lift to the diabetic clinic.

The average number of legs of those waiting was well under 2.

If you son is diagnosed as being diabetic, and I hope he’s not, then life will have to change. He will need to take great care of himself and he will need a lot of support from those around him. Including MIL.

She needs to understand that it’s not just a case of having diabetic chocolate instead. He can’t have treats as such, he needs to develop an understanding of how he needs to look after himself, good eating habits etc.

All the best

With respect @housebrick you are wrong. People with T1D can have any treats they want and eat what they like as long as they carb count and take the correct amount of insulin to deal with the carbohydrates they're eating.

Also diabetic chocolate is definitely not recommended. I didn't even know it was still a thing !!!

hannonle · 04/09/2025 22:46

Did you tell MIL that you wanted to limit sugar because you're concerned he has symptoms of diabetes or does she think you're doing it as a diet? If the latter, she probably thinks, like most people, that a slice of cake isn't going to harm a growing child and that you're being overly precious saying no sugary stuff.

Idiot123 · 04/09/2025 22:45

How did he get on with the GP? Hope all is well with him

housebrick · 04/09/2025 22:42

My, adult, daughter was diagnosed, out of the blue, with T1 diabetes. She was just off 30.

No specific symptoms but thirst, weight loss, general feeling of unwellness.

In some respects she is lucky - those diagnosed earlier have a head start on those accompanying life affecting ailments.

One of the most shocking for me was when I gave her a lift to the diabetic clinic.

The average number of legs of those waiting was well under 2.

If you son is diagnosed as being diabetic, and I hope he’s not, then life will have to change. He will need to take great care of himself and he will need a lot of support from those around him. Including MIL.

She needs to understand that it’s not just a case of having diabetic chocolate instead. He can’t have treats as such, he needs to develop an understanding of how he needs to look after himself, good eating habits etc.

All the best

99bottlesofkombucha · 04/09/2025 22:39

Good luck with the appointment. If there is anything wrong then I would say he can’t go to mils. You’ll have to make other holiday plans.

Trainsandshuttlecocks · 04/09/2025 22:37

Send him to grandparents with a lunchbox and waterbottle. How did the go go, OP?

Currantbun73 · 04/09/2025 22:36

Please, if your child (or anyone!) is showing these symptoms, skip the GP and take him straight to A+E.
New onset type 1 diabetes is a medical emergency.
Hope all is well with OP and her son.

Iloveburgerswaymorethanishould · 04/09/2025 22:02

Thankyou so much for this post!! You’ve just described my 6 yo perfectly!!! He has warts and varuccas that won’t go away even with treatment! He’s constantly thirsty, very small for his age and always lethargic!! He also wees a ridiculous amount and is still wet at night. Sorry no advice, but you’ve alerted me he may need to see the GP. Thankyou xxx

Dramatic · 04/09/2025 21:55

comedycentral · 04/09/2025 21:42

I think we're not living OPs life and we don't really know the ins and outs of how it unfolded, how obvious symptoms were. I think it's easy for us to judge and it's wrong to pick her apart and have a go.

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Therefore it's wrong for her to pick apart what her MIL fed her son and have a go at her 🤷

Pinkproseccolady · 04/09/2025 21:51

Even if this turns out to be less serious and nothing to do with diabetes I would reduce contact with MIL. There's no excuse for giving grandchildren excessive amounts of sugary, fatty foods specifically against a parent's wishes. I'm a grandma and would love to spoil my grandkids endlessly but we're part of the good education team aren't we? We can all see the obesity problems in society and even if he doesn't have diabetes now his poor dietary choices in future could result in Type 2. Her behaviour is irresponsible and disrespectful. Wishing you a good outcome.

comedycentral · 04/09/2025 21:42

Dramatic · 04/09/2025 21:33

But if you have time to let babysitters know and presumably drop them off at said babysitters on several different occasions then why would you not take your child to be seen? You don't just think "oh I wonder if that's diabetes? I better not give him much sugar" and then go about your daily life for several weeks. Or a quick Google would tell you not to anyway. People are being berated for "not reading the thread" but even with reading the thread she absolutely should have taken her son to be seen as a matter of urgency. Mil giving him cake is pretty irrelevant.

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I think we're not living OPs life and we don't really know the ins and outs of how it unfolded, how obvious symptoms were. I think it's easy for us to judge and it's wrong to pick her apart and have a go.