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AIBU?

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Wedding Photographer brought daughter along

59 replies

Anonymous2029 · 02/09/2025 21:45

So we had a very small intimate wedding which was full of lots of emotions due to various reasons. It was just us, our 2 young children and our parents. I asked a local photographer if they would come for an hour for a few photos, I wanted a nice one of the 4 of us, 1 of us all, 1 of us with my parents and 1 with grooms parents. Didn’t feel this was a big ask. Paid £200 for 45 mins of photographers time plus editing which I thought was reasonable.

The night before the photographer messaged and asked if she could bring her daughter aged 9. I should have said no, but I felt a bit pushed into saying yes as she said she had no childcare and I thought she might cancel if I said no!

I wasn’t very happy anyway with the wedding photos, she didn’t get a nice one of the 4 of us. She took it at a really odd angle so you couldn’t see the children’s faces. However my dad took loads and his were much better but in ALL the photos (that my dad took) there is the photographers daughter!!! She wanted to play with the girls but it meant that all the beautiful photos of them in the gardens playing with the flowers and then with us were with this 9 year old. My eldest didn’t take to her and got annoyed that she wanted to play.

The photographer also forgot to take a photo with us my parents! And got annoyed when my husband mentioned it and said she’d take it on one of our phones instead as she’d put her camera away.

AIBU to complain? Would you be annoyed at this? Obviously we can’t change things now and it’s only when looking back at the photos and now I’ve got the professional ones that I’ve realised we don’t have the 1 photo I really wanted :(

OP posts:
BanditTheCat · 02/09/2025 22:01

Sorry you’ve missed out on decent photos OP but is this person actually a wedding photographer, you just mention a local photographer? A proper wedding photographer wouldn’t bring their child along

Amuseaboosh · 02/09/2025 22:00

OP, YABU - She asked, you said yes. End of.
This is a lesson in not people pleasing.
Perhaps you could do a re-shoot? With a friend taking pictures exactly as you want them? I know it isn't the same but at least you'd have some of your DD's without the random 9 year old.

waltzingparrot · 02/09/2025 22:00

Can you photo edit her child out of your photos?

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 02/09/2025 21:59

Bringing her child wasn't great (at the very least she should have ensured her child wasn't captured in any of the shots) but I'd be more annoyed at the quality of the photos. Surely rule number one for a professional photographer is ensuring that everyone is in focus, you can see their faces and nobody has their head cut off.

FuzzyWolf · 02/09/2025 21:56

It’s one thing bringing along a nine year old because you don’t have any childcare but another leaving the child to involve themselves with the guests and play with the bridal party. I doubt complaining will get you anywhere though. Congratulations on your wedding, don’t let this ruin the day.

Anonymous2029 · 02/09/2025 21:52

purpleme12 · 02/09/2025 21:50

Well I think you're not being unreasonable at all and you're justified but you shouldn't have said the daughter could come along....

I know and so I’m not sure I can complain but the night before you get married you don’t really think through these things and until I saw the photos I didn’t really realise the consequences, I think she shouldn’t have asked in the first place to be honest as she knew it was an intimate wedding with emotion behind it all too

OP posts:
purpleme12 · 02/09/2025 21:50

Well I think you're not being unreasonable at all and you're justified but you shouldn't have said the daughter could come along....

DeedlessIndeed · 02/09/2025 21:49

Gah, I'd be really annoyed at this. Not sure what you can do now if you've already paid.

NewGirlInTown · 02/09/2025 21:49

That sounds rubbish service from the photographer.
I doubt you will get any redress, but it’s a pity that you had to be distracted by the daughter on your lovely day. Congratulations though.