To think that people who say diets don’t work aren’t really trying

I can’t shift the last couple of stone because 800 calories a day long term is fucking miserable.

Exactly! That's the point some are struggling to grasp. 800 calories is not a lot of food and when you have had hunger pangs all day, your carefully chosen super-healthy 400 calorie dinner is gone in a flash and you're still hungry, with no prospect of your healthy 200 calorie breakfast for over 12 hours.

Err, why?

It’s also worth mentioning that many people can only eat a very small amount of calories in order to lose/maintain. I’m short and through trial and error have learned that to lose, it’s a maximum of 1000 calories a day. My maintenance calls are around 1400.

I can just about be ok on 1400 calories a day but it means constantly thinking/mentally tracking (or guessing) everything I eat and that in itself is exhausting. It’s really easy to regain weight too.

It’s like being a security guard constantly on duty over your own body. And if you ever take some ‘time off’ for a holiday or you stop counting everything because of a major life crisis or a bereavement, it’s very easy to find yourself a stone or two heavier.

Oh I do like a ‘just eat less, move more’ sort of thread! Goodness, why did none of us thick fatties think of that before? 😳

Yes, biology is simple - less in, reduce mass but, for the majority of serial dieters/overweight people it’s a lot more complex than that. Often (speaking for myself) it’s battling a lifetime of ingrained habits, fighting against genetics (every woman on my mum’s side has a significant weight problem) and dismantling all the thoughts and feelings around food. There’s lots of evidence now that serial dieting can actually cause a hormonal imbalance and that’s one of the reasons some women (me included) have found relief in weight loss jabs. For the first time ever, we feel ‘normal’ as though someone’s switched off the relentless merrygoround of food and serial dieting, not to mention the constant hunger or the sheer misery of sitting at a party nibbling your bag of carrot sticks while everyone else enjoys a burger and a glass of wine.

Thats nothing like losing a stone or two of baby weight. Not even close.

Because people AREN'T "eating less and moving more"! Or they might do so for a period of time, lose the weight, think "that's the dieing fine with now" go back to how they ate previously and regain the weight. Realising it's a lifelong change is the key to staying thin. And as a pp mentioned it can be pretty miserable denying yourself things that aren't deemed healthy.

I agree with this. I would need to eat 800 calories a day to lose. I try to hit 1500 every day, most days are between 1200-1500 and I’m stuck.

I’ve lost a lot of weight, but I can’t shift the last couple of stone because 800 calories a day long term is fucking miserable.

And I don’t have very many other pleasures left. So sometimes I am going to have a blooming donut.

I'm not disagreeing with the principle that you have to eat fewer calories than you burn to lose weight, no.

I'm disagreeing with the statement "To think that people who say diets don’t work aren’t really trying".

In my example, two people are eating the same amount - 1500 kcal daily - theoretically less than the average amount needed to maintain weight (2000 calories a day) but only one is losing weight.

If you can lose weight on 1500 calories a day (without doing insane amounts of exercise) in my opinion you are quite lucky. I mentioned earlier that I could do this in my 20s - ha ha, says menopausal me, bitterly, 30 years later! You have to try, sure, but whatever you might think, you don't have to try as hard as someone who has to go down to 800 calories a day because you can eat almost twice as much.

So someone might go down to 1500 or even 1200 calories a day, be strict on this, weighing and measuring, cutting out favourite foods etc. and not lose any weight. Their diet is not working, yet they are trying. So the OP's premise is incorrect.

Or they’re disabled and physically can’t move? (That is the case for me. I was a size 10/12 until I became disabled and now I’m a 16. I am on slow release opiate painkillers with fast acting ones for breakthrough pain and I still spend a portion of each day in so much pain I can hardly communicate. I’m also on steroids. And look like a balloon.)

Last time I lost weight,I did it by exercise alone. I looked good, I felt good and I ate a variety of food and didn't deprive myself.

I remember saying to someone I exercise so I can eat that piece of cake or burger and chips and not feel guilty.

The guilt around food is the killer for most people. They feel guilty for eating it so get depressed and eat more.

But when you paraphrased OPs comment you totally missed the part about where they said ‘eating less calories’. You are saying ‘some people need to eat less than others to lose weight’……. So they need to eat less calories! We know every body is different and some may take fewer calories but the point is to loose weight we need to eat less calories. You’re not counter arguing that you have said the same.

Weight loss jabs have additional benefits, like blood sugar management.

Science has not said that. Increasingly the impact of blood sugar management and gut health are being understood. On the most basic level eating fewer calories than you need will lose weight, but the calories individuals need varies so much due to other factors and it's also just not sustainable or healthy for a body to be in a calorie deficit long term. I see many MNetters claim they can't eat more than 1000 calories a day without gaining weight. What a miserable way to live and I would wager there's something else going on with their bodies. I also believe you can not sufficiently keep your body nourished on that amount, considering how much fibre, protein, healthy fats etc we are thought to need to have a healthy body

@Comtesse , So why is such a large percentage of the UK population over weight if it’s soooo simple? Do tell us…..
Because they eat too much, and eat the wrong food.

No, because I'm introducing a comparator into the argument.

OP is saying (to paraphrase) "People whose diets don't work aren't really trying. I have dieted successfully because I tried really hard."

I am saying - some people need to eat less than others to lose weight. Two people each on a diet of 1500 calories a day are 'trying' equally hard, but only one of them might lose weight. The other person might need to go down to 1000 calories or less, in other words 'try harder' than the first person.

I personally found the main thing that helped me to lose weight and maintain it, was cutting out the abusive exh and his toxic family.

Being in the right headspace and away from a shit ton of negativity worked wonders.

Many people have stresses and situations in their life which make things extremely difficult that others may find easy. And that includes losing weight.

You’d lose even more weight if you lost all the extra letter o’s from the OP @amijumping. Also, it’s “would have.” But that’s easy, right? You just use the right words. We have all learnt this and it’s really basic stuff. I find spelling very easy! Why can so many people not spell when it’s so obvious how to do it?

Wait! Maybe our brains aren’t all functioning in the same way… Maybe some people can’t spell, maybe some are dyslexic. Maybe some people have brains that produce different levels of certain chemicals relating to appetite, willpower, how our bodies process food, weight loss etc. Genetics is a huge part of how easily people can lose weight. Science says so.

Looks like it’s hit a nerve with a few posters on her

i know a few people who “don’t eat a lot and tried every diet going “ and not lost anything
yet they’ve been on WL jabs that’s suppress your appetite and weights literally fallen off them

Agree totally.

If only the OP could try a bit harder to understand that it's 'lose' weight, and not 'loose' weight.... that really bugs me 🙄 (daughter of 2 English teachers here)

Don't believe in "diets". I believe in eating healthy but not excluding anything. Like I have chocolat for pudding every evening but 50 g, not 200 g. And I exercice. You need to find something that will work for you every day for the rest of your life. So healthy yes, but not depriving yourself because it's not sustainable in the long run.

Losing weight takes time. People don’t understand this. You may lose 5lb in the first week but that is fluid retention loss. Then it’s 0.5-2lb on average.

You can see how people give up on losing weight based on weight management groups (WW and Slimming World) I went to.

The worst time to start joining these groups is at the beginning of the year. There were about 70 odd in the group, about 25-30 of them were newbies. By end of Feb, those 25-30, half gave up. By end of March only about 3-5 of the newbies were still going. Numbers in the meeting were about 25-35. Some just weighed in and left.

Also those who started together with a friend or a sister. If one wasn’t well or unable to go to the meetings, the other one didn’t. Don’t go with someone.

OP, I could lose a stone. I did that almost every year after having DD2, and put it back on again. She's now 16.

What does a typical days food look like for you? Hunger can be controlled when dieting by eating the right foods and drinking plenty of water.

If you eat a lot of sugar or carbohydrates the reason you're always hungry is your bodies insulin response.

Because they're oblivious to the number of calories they're consuming and are couch potatoes

ChatGPT said:
Totally get where you’re coming from – it is bloody hard. People often underestimate how sneaky calories can be (the mayo/toast/butter examples you gave are spot on). You’ve done amazingly well to shift a stone already, especially after having a baby. That takes serious consistency and willpower.
I also think some folks say “diets don’t work” because they expect quick results, or they go too extreme, then bounce back. The way you’re doing it – steady, sustainable, actually tracking – that’s the stuff that sticks long term.
On a slightly different note, since I’ve been reading a lot about health recently, I came across this helpful resource on recognizing signs of dementia early.Obviously it’s not about weight loss, but it reminded me how much our overall health choices now can affect us later in life.
Keep going – you’re clearly on the right track, and the boring bit (consistency) is exactly what gets results in the end!

As a person within a normal and healthy weight range, I hope wiith all my heart that you become obese :) I mean that most sincerely and am not even remotely sorry to have said it :)

When you have the auto immune issues, inflammation and other health issues that so many people have who are fat, when you have had the sort of childhood that causes an ACE trauma in childhood Score that is 4 or more 6 or more which is linked directly and clearly to obesity, cancer, drug addiction and mental health issues as an adult, when you have experienced a severe illness and had to have a regime of drugs that caused you to gain weight, when you been abused into having a dysfunctional relationship to food, when you have any number of the dozens of factors that can cause obesity, then and only then do you get to open your privileged, disgusting, judgemental trap about how easy it is for fat people to lose weight.

With all my heart, I wish you the misery of being fat and being judged by arseholes like you. 😘