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Confused by call from school

236 replies

scorpiogirly · 02/09/2025 15:28

So my daughter who is 7 just went back today in year 3.

I get a call half an hour before I'm due to collect her to ask me if it is okay if the teacher who helps out takes my dd in the mornings in a group of about 10 to do maths. Apparently not that she's going to be taught anything different, just taught slower. What the hell does this mean? It's her first day back and they have never said anything like this before and she has always seemed fine with maths.

They also always tend to have mixed classes. When I questioned it, apparently it is nothing to do with ability. But strangely, they have split two year 3 classes and 2 year 4 classes and mixed them together. Whats the point of that?

OP posts:
scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 12:07

InMyShowgirlEra · 04/09/2025 12:01

Setting a rule and expecting both houses to enforce it without any discussion or agreement never goes well in my experience- especially an arbitrary rule like that. But that's your choice, as long as your daughter doesn't link it with the maths sessions.

Out of interest, what's your relationship with maths like?

She doesn't stay at his house. He takes her out on the weekend and does the school run on a weds.

I was really good at maths in school.

OP posts:
InMyShowgirlEra · 04/09/2025 12:01

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:54

Oh no, I'm not punishing her. I haven't mentioned the maths to her or spoken about it in front of her at all. She has too much screen time in my opinion so reducing it can only be a good thing.

Setting a rule and expecting both houses to enforce it without any discussion or agreement never goes well in my experience- especially an arbitrary rule like that. But that's your choice, as long as your daughter doesn't link it with the maths sessions.

Out of interest, what's your relationship with maths like?

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:54

Oh no, I'm not punishing her. I haven't mentioned the maths to her or spoken about it in front of her at all. She has too much screen time in my opinion so reducing it can only be a good thing.

OP posts:
InMyShowgirlEra · 04/09/2025 11:49

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:04

Not great. Okay at times. I've told him that her screen time is to be cut to half an hour a day. He tries to work against me with anything like this so it's not as easy as it should be.

I'm not sure what screen time has to do with this or how you can enforce something like that at her Dad's when it's a decision you've made without his input. It's likely to feel like a punishment for your daughter too, which will not improve her attitude to maths.

There's a lot of screen apps/TV for maths nowadays which could help rather than hinder. Times Tables Rock stars, Hit the Button and Adaptive Mind are a few options for maths play.

Schools are legally obliged to report to you on whether your child is meeting age related expectations. If that's not on the report, you need to ask and remind them it's a legal requirement.

What you absolutely should not do is make your daughter feel like she's in anyway in trouble or force extra maths on her unless she's happy to do it. If she internalises the idea she's "bad at maths" and "hates maths" now, you're setting her up for a lifetime fear of numbers.

FWIW my SD was "behind" in maths throughout primary school and just got an 8 in Statistics in Y10, predicted 8/9 for both maths and further maths in Y11.

fluffythecat1 · 04/09/2025 11:19

I wouldn’t worry too much, it’s a sign of a good school that they are putting interventions into place early on. It may be something as simple as being a little bit rusty on the first day back. I would arrange to talk to the class teacher to clarify the situation, communication is key and I expect that he/she would be delighted to signpost you to maths resources if you wanted your DD to do more maths homework.
As a TA I would often support small groups in maths work, the teacher generally provides a whole class input and work is set by them. TAs generally then support by keeping pupils on task/providing concrete or pictorial resources to scaffold understanding.

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:19

Planning on doing what?

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:18

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:17

It's going to be working with her after school. To try to help her catch up.

Doesn’t matter as long as you do

and by the look of it, until suggested on this thread, you weren’t planning on doing it either

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:17

It's going to be working with her after school. To try to help her catch up.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:16

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:14

How do you mean?

Well aside from “raging” (yeah yeah, we know… a typo), what is your approach?

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:14

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:12

But I’m not clearly how you’re working for him to work “against” you?

How do you mean?

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:12

But I’m not clearly how you’re working for him to work “against” you?

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:11

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:04

Not great. Okay at times. I've told him that her screen time is to be cut to half an hour a day. He tries to work against me with anything like this so it's not as easy as it should be.

How about you just focus on starting to do something with her outside of the short school days, even just 10 mins a night will help.

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:04

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:02

And that is why your involvement is important

how amicable with ex?

Not great. Okay at times. I've told him that her screen time is to be cut to half an hour a day. He tries to work against me with anything like this so it's not as easy as it should be.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:02

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:01

That is what I plan to do now. Just concerned as other have said if they're learning at a slower pace, they may fall further behind.

And that is why your involvement is important

how amicable with ex?

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 11:01

That is what I plan to do now. Just concerned as other have said if they're learning at a slower pace, they may fall further behind.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 11:00

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 10:58

Not as yet. Her father did the school run yesterday.

I have had a look at her report and nowhere does it mention a struggle with maths.

Also there are no ARE scores or anything like it.

Day 1 of new term they would have done lots of little tests to ascertain where the child is currently at op.

Sit down and work with her regularly so she speeds up with the pace and she’ll be out of the group before you know

no raging required

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 10:58

Not as yet. Her father did the school run yesterday.

I have had a look at her report and nowhere does it mention a struggle with maths.

Also there are no ARE scores or anything like it.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 10:32

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 10:22

Because it wasn't meant to be that word. Weird thing to get so hung up on.

Because it’s telling
And clearly this thread indicates I’m not alone in thinking that
and makes me sympathise with the school!

Have you spoken to the teacher?

scorpiogirly · 04/09/2025 10:22

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 06:13

Can’t even own it

would have been so much better to have just said “yes, with hindsight my use of the word “raging” was hyperbolic and now I’ve paused to reflect, I’m not raging and wasn’t raging”

but nope. It was a “typo” 🙄

you were cross op. And you need to get a grip on that because your daughter’s school sounds proactive and engaged.

Because it wasn't meant to be that word. Weird thing to get so hung up on.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 06:13

scorpiogirly · 03/09/2025 20:12

Can't remember the exact work. I had just picked my daughter up and we were walking to the car. If I was raging, I'd have no problem saying so here.

Can’t even own it

would have been so much better to have just said “yes, with hindsight my use of the word “raging” was hyperbolic and now I’ve paused to reflect, I’m not raging and wasn’t raging”

but nope. It was a “typo” 🙄

you were cross op. And you need to get a grip on that because your daughter’s school sounds proactive and engaged.

scorpiogirly · 03/09/2025 20:12

Can't remember the exact work. I had just picked my daughter up and we were walking to the car. If I was raging, I'd have no problem saying so here.

OP posts:
Sorejaws · 03/09/2025 19:57

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 03/09/2025 19:36

I would ask for a guarantee that my child still had access to a fully qualified teacher

Bizarre

Fetaface · 03/09/2025 19:56

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 03/09/2025 19:36

I would ask for a guarantee that my child still had access to a fully qualified teacher

It is a booster group! Of course they will have. Do you ask for a fully qualified teacher to be doing everything with your child? Odd.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 03/09/2025 19:36

I would ask for a guarantee that my child still had access to a fully qualified teacher

Sorejaws · 03/09/2025 19:24

scorpiogirly · 03/09/2025 19:08

Raging was not the word I was meant to type there as I'm not and was not raging about it. But if some want to believe it was then that's okay too.

what was the word you “meant” to post instead of “raging”?