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AIBU?

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Original poster

Extravagant Pack Lunches

535 replies

Diadrie · 02/09/2025 14:27

I am a TA in a primary school in the middle of a town, real mixed background from families who are mortgage free making well into 6 figures and families living in council homes, earning minimum wage.

As part of my job I supervise the infants half at lunchtime and I have seen the more absurd pack lunches recently from one child. It’s a bento box format, very normal fruit and veg, then greek yogurt and compote, a dip (guacamole/tzatziki/hummus). The main is really star of the show though with: salmon and cream cheese bagel, steak and onion focaccia sandwich, quiche Lorraine etc.

I’m now sat thinking what a totally over the top pack lunches recently for a 5 year old, admittedly the child does finish it, but salmon and steak in children’s pack lunches??

AIBU thinking this is totally over the top, extravagant and slightly absurd.

OP posts:
SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 15:44

@Daisydoodlepoo , I think many posters have effectively challenged that salmon, in particular, is not "OTT" for a child's lunch.

Daisydoodlepoo · 03/09/2025 15:39

OP you are not unreasonable suggesting steak and salmon may be slightly OTT for a child of this age, but it IS unreasonable for replies to assume you are therefore, advocating cheap bread sandwiches and crisps. Some of the replies have been deeply personally insulting as well. I have always been able to afford Waitrose for the weekly shop (I even buy their chicken fillets for my 2 dogs), but take the view that a sandwich or pasta salad, plus fruit and yogurt is more of a standard packed lunch for this age group of children and does not make a parent less caring. A packet of crisps now and again is not a crime either.

SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 15:03

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 15:02

That’s probably what I meant. Goady OP as she knows the responses she’s going to get.

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Ok. I think you're probably right.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 15:02

SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 14:56

I don't think points on here have been inflammatory. I think they've been well balanced and evidenced.
I think the OP was goady, though.

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That’s probably what I meant. Goady OP as she knows the responses she’s going to get.

Daisydoodlepoo · 03/09/2025 14:58

Apologies, I was responding to the poster that felt they might be perceived as a pendant, whilst ridiculing reference to pack lunch ...😀

GameOfJones · 03/09/2025 14:56

itsabeautifuldayjuly · 03/09/2025 14:14

Smoked salmon trimmings aren’t that expensive, more than the cheapest ham but not loads.
quiche is very cheap.
If you are struggling for basics, yes, its expensive. But so ate branded crisps, and nobody would start a thread about children bringing branded food in…

Unfortunately DDs won't eat smoked salmon but I reckon with the price of a packet of smoked salmon trimmings and some own brand cream cheese to bulk the filling out.....it would probably work out about the same cost as a ham sandwich.

SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 14:56

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 14:39

Of course. As the OP knows. As she knows the majority of MN will immediately get frothed up. Just because a point is valid doesn’t mean that it’s not been made with the purpose of being inflammatory. As is the way with most of MN nowadays.

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I don't think points on here have been inflammatory. I think they've been well balanced and evidenced.
I think the OP was goady, though.

Daisydoodlepoo · 03/09/2025 14:45

I believe you mean pedant ....😀

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 14:39

SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 13:55

Well, I think it's valid in the context of the this thread. The OP was judgmental about these lunches, even calling them "absurd". It's fair enough to point out that yoghurt and a salmon bagel is more healthy than Lunchables and Pom bears.

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Of course. As the OP knows. As she knows the majority of MN will immediately get frothed up. Just because a point is valid doesn’t mean that it’s not been made with the purpose of being inflammatory. As is the way with most of MN nowadays.

Borgonzola · 03/09/2025 14:15

‘Absurd’

its just food

itsabeautifuldayjuly · 03/09/2025 14:14

Smoked salmon trimmings aren’t that expensive, more than the cheapest ham but not loads.
quiche is very cheap.
If you are struggling for basics, yes, its expensive. But so ate branded crisps, and nobody would start a thread about children bringing branded food in…

DarkPassenger1 · 03/09/2025 14:09

OP would be in bits if she saw what some of the Asian kids are sent in with in our school. Dhal, curry and rice, samosa! I'm sure that would blow OP's mind as it isn't a jam sandwich.

SuziQuinto · 03/09/2025 13:55

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 13:24

No need for OP to return. They’ve achieved their expectation of MN frothing about how it’s perfectly normal and how they always send their DC in with smoked salmon sandwiches, and even better the frothing around those parents who dare send their kids in with lunchables or Pom bears (worse than crack!)

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Well, I think it's valid in the context of the this thread. The OP was judgmental about these lunches, even calling them "absurd". It's fair enough to point out that yoghurt and a salmon bagel is more healthy than Lunchables and Pom bears.

jonthebatiste · 03/09/2025 13:42

chocolatemademefat · 03/09/2025 12:20

How middle class IS this site. People are struggling to feed their kids and others on here are making out smoked salmon and steak is perfectly normal in packed lunches.

if I didn’t get such a laugh at the belters posting on here it would be a waste of time coming on. I really miss the old Mumsnet when people weren’t up their own backsides.

SOME people struggle to feed their kids. SOME people feed their kids smoked salmon bagels or leftover steak sandwiches (roast beef slices they were called way back when). SOME people fall between the two. No single group is wrong or abnormal. Every group could benefit from knowing that. Every group could benefit from not sneering at the others. Those with more could do with helping out those with less.

DedododoDedadada · 03/09/2025 13:29

Salmon is the only fish, i like so wouldn't see any issue with giving some to a young child. It's a healthy protein. Change the label of a steak foccacia to beef sandwich and it doesn't sound as peak but is the same thing essentially.
If the kids were coming in with caviar and oysters I could maybe see your point.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 03/09/2025 13:24

TarteauPomme · 03/09/2025 09:41

no more op, one and done kind of post

No need for OP to return. They’ve achieved their expectation of MN frothing about how it’s perfectly normal and how they always send their DC in with smoked salmon sandwiches, and even better the frothing around those parents who dare send their kids in with lunchables or Pom bears (worse than crack!)

Leaningtowerofpisa · 03/09/2025 13:24

Op you are an inverse snob

SweetnsourNZ · 03/09/2025 13:12

Maybe this child tends to eat more at lunch and not much at dinner time. It isn't unusual for young children to have a peak eating time. Sounds like a great lunch. We got jam sandwiches and an apple in the 70s.

SugarPlumpFairyCakes · 03/09/2025 13:09

Sounds like an amazing lunch. And?

Wildfairy · 03/09/2025 13:06

chocolatemademefat · 03/09/2025 12:20

How middle class IS this site. People are struggling to feed their kids and others on here are making out smoked salmon and steak is perfectly normal in packed lunches.

if I didn’t get such a laugh at the belters posting on here it would be a waste of time coming on. I really miss the old Mumsnet when people weren’t up their own backsides.

But it is normal for some, and that’s ok. I understand it’s upsetting you that some children and families can afford to eat so well, but it doesn’t mean it’s not their normal, and I’m sure you wouldn’t wish them to judge you on what you feed your kids, so don’t do the same back.

Kirbert2 · 03/09/2025 13:02

chocolatemademefat · 03/09/2025 12:20

How middle class IS this site. People are struggling to feed their kids and others on here are making out smoked salmon and steak is perfectly normal in packed lunches.

if I didn’t get such a laugh at the belters posting on here it would be a waste of time coming on. I really miss the old Mumsnet when people weren’t up their own backsides.

It is perfectly normal for some families and as long as the child eats it, who cares?

H34th · 03/09/2025 12:59

chocolatemademefat · 03/09/2025 12:20

How middle class IS this site. People are struggling to feed their kids and others on here are making out smoked salmon and steak is perfectly normal in packed lunches.

if I didn’t get such a laugh at the belters posting on here it would be a waste of time coming on. I really miss the old Mumsnet when people weren’t up their own backsides.

Yes, it must be the middle class mums. Can’t be someone who was brought up on tomatoes and feta as the cheapest food option in their culture.

A poster talked about the lack of aspiration among many and how being ‘working class’ is used as an excuse to basically not do better by their own children (this or another thread). You are just affirming that by putting people, and presumably yourself, in outdated social class categories.

ResusciAnnie · 03/09/2025 12:56

Cherrytree86 · 03/09/2025 12:51

yeah in real life smoked salmon and steak for lunch isn’t the norm.

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Well clearly it is, as that child has it for lunch in real life.

Cherrytree86 · 03/09/2025 12:51

chocolatemademefat · 03/09/2025 12:20

How middle class IS this site. People are struggling to feed their kids and others on here are making out smoked salmon and steak is perfectly normal in packed lunches.

if I didn’t get such a laugh at the belters posting on here it would be a waste of time coming on. I really miss the old Mumsnet when people weren’t up their own backsides.

yeah in real life smoked salmon and steak for lunch isn’t the norm.

ThisZanyPinkSquid · 03/09/2025 12:51

If that’s what they eat and it’s polished off I really don’t see the problem and think you are being judgy 🤷🏼‍♀️