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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To make the kids walk 3miles to school?

792 replies

DHdoingmyheadin · 02/09/2025 08:07

Due to ongoing roadworks, the main road through the village to my kids school is closed and will be for c. a month. We are right at the edge of where the roadworks are so we have two options:

(A) A 15 mile detour by car, down the road all the traffic is being funnelled down (a main A road that is congested even when the road through the village is open). Which I trialled yesterday, and took me 45 minutes each way. This was with no school traffic as schools go back tomorrow. So I’d be doing at least 90 minutes of driving each morning and DH 90 mins in the afternoon.

(B) The kids walk to school and back. 3 miles each way.

DH is adamant I can’t possibly expect them to walk. It’s hilly. It’s due to rain. I think they walk. I think it would be insane to drive when it’s literally faster for them to walk. It’s 3 miles. I’m not asking them to swim the channel and then scale Mount Everest. Kids are 12 and 13.

AIBU to put my foot down and refuse to drive?

OP posts:
MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 18:09

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 18:09

More hyperbole. Yawn.

If you can’t genuinely disagree with the substance of my argument, stop embarrassing yourself with these infantile barbs.

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 18:09

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 18:08

Strawman fallacy and ad hominem attack - why am I not surprised.

More hyperbole. Yawn.

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 18:08

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 16:27

I’m saying I wouldn’t put my children through the faff of walking to and from school in shit weather, with heavy bags, up hills. No need to start frothing at the mouth.

Strawman fallacy and ad hominem attack - why am I not surprised.

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 16:27

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 15:21

Hilarious that you are questioning others’ comprehension. It’s not a 6-mile walk, it’s a 3-mile walk twice, separated by about 6 hours of mainly sitting down. Of course it’s not fun to walk to school. Sadly, life isn’t all unicorns shitting rainbows. Walking to and from school for a few weeks is not a problem, even with a heavy bag. As many posters have pointed out, a great many of us have done this without any harm. You cannot possibly argue that this kind of gentle exercise could be harmful to 12 and 13-year-olds. What a disingenuous argument that would be.

I’m saying I wouldn’t put my children through the faff of walking to and from school in shit weather, with heavy bags, up hills. No need to start frothing at the mouth.

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 15:21

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 14:44

I agree.

Also no one is saying that teenagers / pre teens shouldn’t be able to walk this distance. Some posters either lack reading comprehension or are being obtuse. Posters have been pointing out that a 6 mile walk in the CONTEXT of going to school, likely with heavy bags/equipment, is hardly going to be a ‘fun adventure’ stated by some. It’s just funny at this point!

Hilarious that you are questioning others’ comprehension. It’s not a 6-mile walk, it’s a 3-mile walk twice, separated by about 6 hours of mainly sitting down. Of course it’s not fun to walk to school. Sadly, life isn’t all unicorns shitting rainbows. Walking to and from school for a few weeks is not a problem, even with a heavy bag. As many posters have pointed out, a great many of us have done this without any harm. You cannot possibly argue that this kind of gentle exercise could be harmful to 12 and 13-year-olds. What a disingenuous argument that would be.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 04/09/2025 15:17

Plastictreees · 02/09/2025 08:25

A six mile walk per day is ridiculous. Don’t you like your children?

That's mad..

Fit kids should be able to walk 5/6 miles daily without killing themselves!!

Natsku · 04/09/2025 15:06

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 14:34

I don't think it would be practical! Even at a smallish secondary, you would require accommodation for about 700 horses! Sounds fun though!

Ah but think about the money the school could make selling the manure to gardeners!

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 14:44

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 14:29

Not really! Most people never had to walk 3 miles to school because they never lived 3 miles from school. In urban areas they generally lived closer and/or had regular pubic transport. In rural areas many people lived a good deal more than 3 miles from school so school buses were provided.

I agree.

Also no one is saying that teenagers / pre teens shouldn’t be able to walk this distance. Some posters either lack reading comprehension or are being obtuse. Posters have been pointing out that a 6 mile walk in the CONTEXT of going to school, likely with heavy bags/equipment, is hardly going to be a ‘fun adventure’ stated by some. It’s just funny at this point!

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 14:34

Natsku · 04/09/2025 14:30

Would love to ride a horse to school but I wouldn't want to miss indoor plumbing.

I don't think it would be practical! Even at a smallish secondary, you would require accommodation for about 700 horses! Sounds fun though!

Natsku · 04/09/2025 14:30

BeAzureRaven · 04/09/2025 13:51

This was back in the early 1900s, he was born about 1906, so this would have been 1920 ish. Everybody had horses, and there was a stable where you could 'park' your ride. Wouldn't it be fun if we could travel back in time to different periods, just to experience it for a day?

Would love to ride a horse to school but I wouldn't want to miss indoor plumbing.

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 14:29

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 12:37

Whether a poster is or was obese is surely irrelevant to the points being made, which are that, as a society, we are becoming more obese, children are engaging in far less physical activity, and walking is good exercise.

The fact that so many people appear to believe that 3-mile or a one-hour walk twice a day is excessive for teenagers exemplifies the problem.

Not really! Most people never had to walk 3 miles to school because they never lived 3 miles from school. In urban areas they generally lived closer and/or had regular pubic transport. In rural areas many people lived a good deal more than 3 miles from school so school buses were provided.

jannier · 04/09/2025 14:27

HeyThereDelila · 04/09/2025 04:28

Cycle or scoot? And you give them a lift in bad weather/make sure they keep a change of trousers at school.

What are other local parents doing? Our primary school has a bike bus where children and parents can cycle together as a group. Could that work?

They are senior school

DearDenimEagle · 04/09/2025 14:00

BeAzureRaven · 04/09/2025 13:51

This was back in the early 1900s, he was born about 1906, so this would have been 1920 ish. Everybody had horses, and there was a stable where you could 'park' your ride. Wouldn't it be fun if we could travel back in time to different periods, just to experience it for a day?

I think I’d not bother coming back

BeAzureRaven · 04/09/2025 13:51

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 08:02

Where did he keep his horse whilst he was at school @BeAzureRaven ?

This was back in the early 1900s, he was born about 1906, so this would have been 1920 ish. Everybody had horses, and there was a stable where you could 'park' your ride. Wouldn't it be fun if we could travel back in time to different periods, just to experience it for a day?

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 13:50

WalkDontWalk · 04/09/2025 09:09

I’d just like to note an unusual phenomenon.

I started reading this thread thinking you were being unreasonable, but having read it all, I’ve changed my mind.

…I’m not saying this is a first, but it doesn’t happen every day.

I might start another thread to discuss how often that happens to other people.

Edited

No, I don't think OP is being unreasonable. It is only for 6 weeks at a fairly decent time of year - not too hot or too cold. Will they enjoy it? Probably not? But no less than OP would enjoy a 1.5 hour round trip. Though it would probably be her DH doing it, as she probably leaves the house before the DC are up in order to do her commute into London which also involves 7 miles of walking. There may even be other options that she hasn't even investigate (though not perhaps the horse), I still think may to the posts on here are truly bizarre.

DearDenimEagle · 04/09/2025 13:49

Walking is fine. I was supposed to take 2 connecting buses to school…I caught the first bus, to the next town, but walked from there to the town with the school, about 6 miles for bus#2 I walked to save the bus fares so I could buy lunch. I was 12.

MyDogHumpsThings · 04/09/2025 12:37

Whether a poster is or was obese is surely irrelevant to the points being made, which are that, as a society, we are becoming more obese, children are engaging in far less physical activity, and walking is good exercise.

The fact that so many people appear to believe that 3-mile or a one-hour walk twice a day is excessive for teenagers exemplifies the problem.

Goldbar · 04/09/2025 12:27

I hope your DC escaped the torrential rain this morning, OP. Oddly enough, we normally always walk to school but drove today instead since it was bucketing down 😅.

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 11:13

@Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim 😂😂

Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim · 04/09/2025 10:56

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 10:50

Hilarious. I’m not surprised in the slightest!

How is someone who has struggled with weight gain after having their third child speaking about how the move towards normalising driving short distances is unhealthy, hilarious?

Do you dismiss people with mental health problems having opinions on how that can be improved?

Plastictreees · 04/09/2025 10:50

Sorejaws · 04/09/2025 08:24

Fgs @Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim i was on the Monjaru weight loss injections support threads with you. You are obese. Get off your high horse

Edited

Hilarious. I’m not surprised in the slightest!

PensionedCruiser · 04/09/2025 10:43

Tallgirlsrock · 04/09/2025 09:58

I think they only provide free transport if the school is over the reasonable distance guidelines and is the nearest school

Be that as it may, but under the circumstances, the need for all the parents to take their children to school while there is traffic disruption is going to add to the traffic using the detour and that is likely to cause a headache for the Local Authority anyway. It would seem like a sensible and logical decision to remove parental cars from the situation by providing temporary school transport.

I'm not objecting to secondary school pupils walking per se, but I do think that doing it carrying the heavy weights they seem to carry around these days is a problem.

(My son, who only had a 10 minute walk to school, had damaged his back by the time he was 16. Now in his early 30s, the problem persists - it has definitely been damaged by carrying the bag. He has not been the only one affected. They had not provided enough lockers at school, so many pupils carried everything (including coats) around all day. He refused to wear one!)

xmaswiththeinlaws · 04/09/2025 10:10

I think bikes would be a good idea, you can get panniers for putting book bags in so they won't feel as heavy. They aren't too bad for pushing up hill. I used to cycle to school down hill on the way there, uphill on the way home. It worked quite well as downhill when you have a time constraint and uphill when you have less of a deadline. I got off and pushed for the steep uphill bit. You get used to it, even in heavy rain. It's only for a month or so though isn't it?

Alternatively, is there anyone else in the village they can car share with?

Tallgirlsrock · 04/09/2025 09:58

CecilyP · 04/09/2025 01:49

No it doesn't. Local authorities have as statutory duty to provide free transport for primary children travelling over 2 miles and for secondary children travelling over 3 miles

I think they only provide free transport if the school is over the reasonable distance guidelines and is the nearest school

dottiedodah · 04/09/2025 09:49

I would prefer to take them in really.My Son liked School and did very well.However he didnt like getting up! They will be facing 2 long walks People say it was different and they walked miles each day Forget there is a massive increase in traffic now.

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