DSD picking newborn up and putting him back in Moses basket

It’s nasty and bullying to eye roll at people and call their advised methods ‘ridiculous’ when giving unsolicited advice that is zero of your business. If you can’t understand an incredibly simple thing like that, then I can’t help you.

It's not a bullying or nasty reply - you seem fairly determined to pick a fight with someone on this thread, don't you, keyboard warrior?

It's relevant to give further information to parents where it might prompt them to look further into the advice they have been given to enable them to make decisions based on common sense.

Have you got an aversion to eye rolling emojis then? You should get that checked out! 😂

🙄🙄🙄🙄😁

“Screaming his lungs out”

Quite the drip feed 🙄

You need to be less dramatic and stop excluding your DSD

It’s up to the OP what newborn advice she follows. Your unsolicited opinion on it isn’t relevant. And if you’re trying in any way to be helpful for ‘young parents’ then perhaps you might try leaving out the immature eye-rolling emojis.

If I see bullying and nasty replies, I’ll call it out. K?

Weirdly though Ops initial opening post doesn’t mention the ‘horror’ of her ds doing the same thing….that was only brought up further down the post.

🙄🙄🙄

It's a public forum, and it's the first time I've heard this absolute shitshow of guidance. It might not be the topic but it's in the content. How many young parents are unnecessarily avoiding help from friends and family because this 'advice' is out there. There are absolutely no research papers that I can find that back this up. Why is it any of your business which aspect of the OP's comments I choose to comment on. MYOB.

Edited to add that the OP may feel that she's not allowed to stray from the 'advice' given. She's not the only one. Here's a post from Reddit where the poster is concerned because she's only allowed two people to give bottles but would like parents to give bottles in preparation for her return to work.

https://www.reddit.com/r/FormulaFeeders/comments/1acef25/question_about_other_people_family_members/

OP has said numerous times the same applies to her son. Why don’t you read the thread and attempt to add something of value that isn’t sarcastic and ill-informed.

And is your eye rolling supposed to be clever? Because you’re behaving like a 12yr old yourself with your attitude.

OP has said numerous times the same applies to her son. Why don’t you read the thread and attempt to add something of value that isn’t sarcastic and ill-informed.

And is your eye rolling supposed to be clever? Because you’re behaving like a 12yr old yourself with your attitude.

Can you explain the drama? OP is concerned about both newborn and upsetting a sensitive 12yr old. The only people making this a drama are bullying posters.

Why is it any of your business what NHS-led advice OP and her partner choose to follow with their newborn? It’s not the topic of OP’s post and whether you agree with it or not is 100% irrelevant.

If she was your dd would you be coming on here horrified that she’d picked up her baby sibling!? You’re acting like she’s a stranger. When you’re raising children, you guide them on how to approach issues. A simple ‘might be best to let us be next to you when you want to pick her up, as she’s still very young’ would suffice. Not jumping onto the internet hyperboling. 🙄

Can you just clarify the confusion bit from your last paragraph? Confusion around whether the baby has been fed? Or that the baby gets confused due to being fed a bottle by more than two people? 🙄
It's ridiculous either way.

I've just had a google and discovered this gem is being suggested by all NHS trusts. Yet another ridiculous meaningless rule that someone came up with and sold to the NHS.

Your baby will not get confused if a third or a fourth person gives them the occasional bottle. It's lovely for another person to make that eye contact with baby and chat to them while they're feeding. It enables the baby to experience closeness with other family members. I'd love to know which idiot came up with that ridiculous guideline.

Think about this logically - if baby is in nursery from a very young age they're fed by loads of different people. If they have to stay in hospital after birth and you can't they are fed by loads of different nurses.

When my sisters and I had our babies we would go to each others houses to look after each others babies and bottle feed them so the mother could get some sleep. Every one of those babies knows who their mothers are. They're too little to get confused. You will always be the primary caregiver. By sticking to this frankly made up rule you're stopping your son and step daughter from bonding with their baby sibling. So sad.

we have no issues here holding the baby.

its the safe removal and putting down of the child whilst he’s still so delicate.

No she did not which completely took me back, I didn’t want to embarrass her by explaining what she had done as she’s quite sensitive but neither of us have ever shown her how to do it either

@Blessthismess2 yes I’m the wicked evil step mother that treats all children differently.

it’s one rule for all in our house.

that includes waiting for LO to be older before moving him around. Ask us to hold him, not a problem. Anything else we’ve agreed we do ourselves.

i understand the suggestion around feeding, but our midwife advised to keep feeding to just the two of us, to save confusion and make sure LO is clear who does that. Lots have changed in 11 years so it’s COMPLETELY different to having children 2 years apart

Goodness , what a lot of drama over a skill that a 12 yr old can pick up in 2 minutes.

I think enough advice has been given already.

Can you explain the drama? OP is concerned about both newborn and upsetting a sensitive 12yr old. The only people making this a drama are bullying posters.

Goodness , what a lot of drama over a skill that a 12 yr old can pick up in 2 minutes.

I dont understand the problem. It isn't that hard to gently put a baby down, especially for a 12 year old.

You’re getting a terribly hard time on this post OP. I find it a bit strange! Shocked at the person that tried to say a 4 week old isn’t delicate. These posts seem to invite the strangest and most vicious attitudes towards new mums. Please ignore them. Having recently had a baby I can back you up on the feeding thing.
Maybe it’s a generational thing of people forgetting what it was like to have babies, or alternatively they’re from THAT generation (you know the ones… trying to touch your baby in the supermarket… shudder). maybe some people on this thread need reminding why infant death has dramatically decreased since since 90’s. Survivor bias.

YANBU, I wouldn’t want a 12 year old lifting up my tiny baby either, the “she’s 12 not 2” comments are odd. She’s still a child that doesn’t know how to do it correctly. Her being your SC seems irrelevant but people have obsessively jumped on it.

I would teach her how to do it, but also explain please don’t take him in an out of his Moses basket without you there. You can explain it in a nice way no need to be embarrassed. You’re protecting your child. Don’t let them make you out to be a wicked step mother not wanting a child to man handle your 4 week old baby. People on this site are so weird.