Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you only properly enjoy the school holidays if you don’t work or are part time?

63 replies

Forky1 · 01/09/2025 22:35

Up until this year, I worked part time and found the school holidays much easier to juggle. I enjoyed days out with the kids and generally did not find it too stressful. Fast forward to this year and I am full time in a job with long hours and unpaid overtime and it has honestly been such a juggle. For the first time in years, I agree with people when they say 6 weeks is too long.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:41

Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 01/09/2025 23:38

I can only speak from my personal experience but I don't work and I've just survived 9 long weeks solo parenting 2 DC with SEN with zero childcare/support and I would've loved to have been able to escape at points to a job where I could have adult conversations and let somebody else be responsible for a few hours for keeping the DC alive!
I don't think it comes down to working FT, PT or not at all, I think it comes down to your personal circumstances, finances, support, etc. We've had great craic over the last 9 weeks, some really great days and amazing memories made but it's certainly not been all good or indeed all bad

This is an excellent perspective and I agree with all you have said- it really is down to personal circumstances.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:40

RubieChewsDay · 01/09/2025 22:58

@PersephonePomegranate Would the children and the teachers actually need to have a break that long if they had more regular breaks through the year though? A longer Easter break perhaps or 2 week rather than 1 week half terms.

I'm in NI and the kids are off for 8 1/2 weeks and the only week long half term is in the Autumn term, it's an insane approach.

Agree that 30 days hols for the parents definitely makes a difference though, I used to buy an extra 5 days at a previous job and it was so helpful.

Edited

I do feel more regular breaks throughout the year would be easier to manage to be honest. However, ultimately employers need to offer flexible working as standard in school holidays and annual leave needs to be more generous.

OP posts:
Mumof2amazingasdkiddos · 01/09/2025 23:38

I can only speak from my personal experience but I don't work and I've just survived 9 long weeks solo parenting 2 DC with SEN with zero childcare/support and I would've loved to have been able to escape at points to a job where I could have adult conversations and let somebody else be responsible for a few hours for keeping the DC alive!
I don't think it comes down to working FT, PT or not at all, I think it comes down to your personal circumstances, finances, support, etc. We've had great craic over the last 9 weeks, some really great days and amazing memories made but it's certainly not been all good or indeed all bad

Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:37

No3392 · 01/09/2025 23:18

This summer was the first time I've enjoyed the school holidays. And it's because I now WFH full time. Sadly it's an adjustment for a serious degenerative disease I have been diagnosed with.

But it's been so nice having lunch at home with the kids every day.

I'm dreading them going back and all the school stuff starting.

Sorry to hear the reasons why your working pattern has changed but lovely you have been able to spend more time with your children. I bet they have loved having you around more too.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:35

PersephonePomegranate · 01/09/2025 22:56

Usually because they're well paid jobs where it's expected that you work the hours required to get the job done and there are performance-based bonuses.

Show quote history

Sadly I do not work in a corporate job but the nature of what I do means I can’t just clock off at 5pm and go home. It’s an expectation in the line of work I do. I enjoy it but it can feel very thankless and is not family friendly. However, I have spent a lot of time to training to do what I do and couldn’t give my career up now.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:34

JaninaDuszejko · 01/09/2025 22:48

DH and I both work FT but have generous annual leave, can WFH, and while we now have older kids we had easy access to decent holiday cover when they were younger. We would have the kids in childcare for about half the summer but I refused to feel guilty about that. They were at a (very relaxed) sports club so were with their friends, went swimming every afternoon, played outside in the morning so had a great time.

Sadly I have a child who struggles with anxiety and will not go to any holiday clubs. Grandparents who are retired do not live locally and other grandparents work so very limited help in way of childcare from family.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forky1 · 01/09/2025 23:31

wonderstuff · 01/09/2025 22:41

So is it that the holidays are too long, or is it that your job isn’t family friendly? The UK holidays are one of the shortest school summer breaks in the world.

Every year we get this school holidays are they too long debate, and I personally would much rather we had a ‘do employers need to be more family friendly?’ discussion.

My job is definitely not family friendly. The irony is, it is working with children so when the schools close, my job becomes even busier.

I definitely agree the discussion needs to be reframed to employers being more family-friendly and the government encouraging more childcare initiates to support working parenting during school holidays etc. I would also apply the same train of through to 9am-5pm hours or in the case of my workplace 8:30am to 5pm and beyond which is a nightmare for school run etc.

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 01/09/2025 23:23

Don’t you use annual leave?

No3392 · 01/09/2025 23:18

This summer was the first time I've enjoyed the school holidays. And it's because I now WFH full time. Sadly it's an adjustment for a serious degenerative disease I have been diagnosed with.

But it's been so nice having lunch at home with the kids every day.

I'm dreading them going back and all the school stuff starting.

Cherryicecreamx · 01/09/2025 23:16

For me I would say it's the other way round! I've had this summer off as a SAHM and we've had fun days of course, but it feels relentless. Constantly thinking of ideas of what to do to keep DS entertained, not being able to have any time to do something productive myself (even keeping on top of the house), financially you spend more doing activities (even when we do spend lots of days down the park).
I've had a particularly difficult day today but I've found it frustrating getting no rest bite and having outstanding things I need to do but I'm in entertainment mode or feel guilty otherwise.

flumposie · 01/09/2025 23:15

Hate to mention it to those who think the holiday is too long, but the Summer holiday is 7 weeks next year. ( definitely in North Yorkshire)

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 23:13

PotatoBreadForTheWin · 01/09/2025 23:08

Correct, TOIL isn’t a thing in well paid, salaried jobs

Show quote history

😅😅😅 I see. I've never really had a 'job'.

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 23:10

NuovaPilbeam · 01/09/2025 23:01

Slightly off thread but I've seen a couple of posts on here about people working unpaid / no toil overtime hours. What kind of jobs are these? And why are you doing it?

Corporate jobs.... where they constantly have recruitment freezes and the general approach is to operate with as few staff as possible.

Why do I do it?

  • the public sector equivalent of my job, with minimal hours etc and TOIL, pays literally half what I am paid on the corporate side, and they moved all the roles up North/to Wales where I do not live.
  • I need the money to pay for house/bills etc
  • I lead a small team. The alternative to me pulling some extra hours on an evening would be me shitting on lower paid staff to make them do it. No, I am not going to do that.

Oh God that seems awful. I wondered what people were talking about saying they were working all these hours.
One woman & her husband were doing minimum wage jobs as well!!!

hmmnotreallysure · 01/09/2025 23:10

I work in a school and I find the 6 weeks too long.
It's too long to be out of a routine, I really do sympathise with parents who work full time and have to try and juggle 6 weeks of childcare.

PotatoBreadForTheWin · 01/09/2025 23:08

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 23:06

But no toil??!

Show quote history

Correct, TOIL isn’t a thing in well paid, salaried jobs

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 23:06

PersephonePomegranate · 01/09/2025 22:56

Usually because they're well paid jobs where it's expected that you work the hours required to get the job done and there are performance-based bonuses.

Show quote history

But no toil??!

NuovaPilbeam · 01/09/2025 23:05

My kids are SO ready to go back.

Its not like some magical nostalgic era (70s maybe?) where in the summer there'd be a load of similar aged kids roaming the neighbourhood having a great time building a go cart from an orange box & pram wheels.

I had some time off at home with mine & they were bored basically, eldest wants to see his friends (they were away/in childcare/with granny etc because parents all work). They like school, they'll be delighted to go back.

suitcaseofdreams · 01/09/2025 23:02

I work full time but mine are teenagers and I love the summer holidays - no stress getting them up and out for school, no school related admin or paperwork to deal with, fewer after school activities to manage (although they do continue their sports training over the summer)
I get more work done/find work much easier when the kids aren't at school!

NuovaPilbeam · 01/09/2025 23:01

Slightly off thread but I've seen a couple of posts on here about people working unpaid / no toil overtime hours. What kind of jobs are these? And why are you doing it?

Corporate jobs.... where they constantly have recruitment freezes and the general approach is to operate with as few staff as possible.

Why do I do it?

  • the public sector equivalent of my job, with minimal hours etc and TOIL, pays literally half what I am paid on the corporate side, and they moved all the roles up North/to Wales where I do not live.
  • I need the money to pay for house/bills etc
  • I lead a small team. The alternative to me pulling some extra hours on an evening would be me shitting on lower paid staff to make them do it. No, I am not going to do that.
RubieChewsDay · 01/09/2025 22:58

@PersephonePomegranate Would the children and the teachers actually need to have a break that long if they had more regular breaks through the year though? A longer Easter break perhaps or 2 week rather than 1 week half terms.

I'm in NI and the kids are off for 8 1/2 weeks and the only week long half term is in the Autumn term, it's an insane approach.

Agree that 30 days hols for the parents definitely makes a difference though, I used to buy an extra 5 days at a previous job and it was so helpful.

PersephonePomegranate · 01/09/2025 22:56

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 22:53

Slightly off thread but I've seen a couple of posts on here about people working unpaid / no toil overtime hours. What kind of jobs are these? And why are you doing it?

Usually because they're well paid jobs where it's expected that you work the hours required to get the job done and there are performance-based bonuses.

EsmeSusanOgg · 01/09/2025 22:56

I work FT, but I try to make sure I get a decent amount if time off in the holidays. Lots of shorter weeks for example. I love getting more time with the kids.

PotatoBreadForTheWin · 01/09/2025 22:54

The only parents I’ve known until now who liked the holidays were either teachers, married to teachers, or stay at home mums - mainly the type who find it so stressful/impossible to get out the door and get the kids to school on time 🙄

my kids are teens now and I was reflecting on this yesterday, it’s the first summer holiday that hasn’t felt like a massive horrible juggle of work with insufficient childcare.

they are too long in my view, my kids are totally ready to go back tomorrow, but hang in there OP. It does eventually get better

GypsyQueeen · 01/09/2025 22:53

Slightly off thread but I've seen a couple of posts on here about people working unpaid / no toil overtime hours. What kind of jobs are these? And why are you doing it?

PersephonePomegranate · 01/09/2025 22:50

It's too long from the perspective of working parents, but not for the children, or the school staff, who really need that break.

I think the real problem, is the standard 25 day holiday package. Even 30 days would make such a difference.

I'm fortunate in that although I still need to be in the office, things really slow down over summer and people coming in later and leaving earlier for camp drops offs and pick ups (or even just to get home and spend more time with your family while you can) in common.