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Original poster

To invite housekeeper for Christmas?

59 replies

SpiltLatte · 01/09/2025 19:35

We have a live in house keeper/PA who is brilliant, I couldn’t manage without her. She lives in our house but her bedroom has its own corridor with her own bathroom and a staircase directly down to the kitchen (which hasits own door to outside) so it’s kind of like a little flat.

Last year at Christmas she went home to spend it with her parents. She had a miserable time and came back quite depressed. I won’t go into it but it’s not a great relationship.

so this year I’m thinking of asking her to stay here for Christmas and spend it with us as part of the (very small!) family. DH thinks this is weird and will come across as such. Is it?

OP posts:
Iloveeverycat · 01/09/2025 19:45

I think that is a lovely idea

TheChosenTwo · 01/09/2025 19:43

I think it would be a lovely gesture and I’d do it as a pp suggested, “if you’re not planning on going home to your parents for Christmas this year you’re more than welcome to join us or even just stay here if you want.”
we’ve often had additional one off guests join us for Christmas.

MeganM3 · 01/09/2025 19:42

It’s not weird to invite her. It’s nice. Just be sure there’s no pressure on her to accept, and it’s absolutely fine if she decides not to join you.
Also make clear it’s not for her to work, just to be your guest. If that’s what you’re suggesting.

Lovely to offer though - it’s always nice to be invited to things isn’t it.

Arlanymor · 01/09/2025 19:41

I think it’s a lovely idea on the surface - but how you explain it is key. Is she coming as a family friend or is she expected to work? Hopefully the former and as @MidnightPatrol has said, make it a nice casual suggestion which she can accept or not. But you do need to be clear about the not working aspect

Barrenfieldoffucks · 01/09/2025 19:40

As long as you're able to adapt to treating her as a friend on an equal footing, and not as an employee.

MidnightPatrol · 01/09/2025 19:38

I think that’s lovely - pitch it as ‘if you aren’t seeing your parents we’d love to have you join us’ so if she wants to say no she can easily.

Badlypaintedrose · 01/09/2025 19:37

Depends - will she have to work as your housekeeper during that time? If not, will it be strange when she goes back to being the housekeeper?

or maybe you could just make it clear that she doesn’t need to leave at Christmas, could spend it alone in her flat or invite people over etc?

Jesswebster01 · 01/09/2025 19:37

I think it's a nice idea just make it a casual suggestion so she doesn't feel obliged to say yes

Smallsalt · 01/09/2025 19:37

I think it's very kind of you and if you have the kind of relationship where you would both feel comfortable it's a lovely idea.

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