SIL still isolating due to covid risk

He has also changed his lifestyle, which is troubling in itself, because it feels enabling of her issue, but I can understand that he wants to keep the peace.

He is naturally an introvert (as I mentioned earlier in the thread, she is actually the more extroverted one before she developed this issue), so he doesn't go out much and also works from home. When he does go out with his mates or comes to see us, which would only happen a couple of times a month, he has to sleep in the guest room and wear a mask for 48 hours afterwards!!!!

Yes they are. My Mum caught one of the ‘mild’ strains last year, nearly died, was in hospital for ten weeks and now has long covid.

Are people still getting long covid from the most recent variants? The only people I know with LC got it early on (and are still struggling 4-5 years later).

Yeah I’m wondering what she’s not doing that everyone wants her to do. Maybe it’s showing her face at social events that she doesn’t really enjoy anyway.

Who’s to say what the “correct” way to live is?

I do agree that the impact on the DH is troubling in this instance.

But I disagree it is not clear what she is living for. I'm afraid I find that patronising in the extreme. Its not for us to say. She has a job, she has a partner (who she needs to consider, I agree), she gets out for walks. There might just not be anything - pub, shops etc - that she feels that compelled to pursue that cannot be pursued at home.

I am COVID cautious. I wear my N95 100% of the time I'm indoors (except at home). I only eat in outdoor restaurants and cafes. We test whenever anyone in the household is ill. My children don't get taken to crowded ball pit type places but we do visit indoor things with masks on at non peak times.

COVID is a neuro invasive, vascular disease, and it's clear that every infection, however mild, leaves a mark on the body. It also damages the immune system and can cause cognitive decline. Just because the initial symptoms are mild doesn't mean you have been undamaged. Mainstream media has chosen to avoid the topic but there are articles highlighting the research/evidence on cognitive damage, risk of heart attack and strokes, immune system damage, long COVID etc if you look. And over 400,000 peer reviewed papers.

It makes sense to avoid catching it repeatedly and wearing a mask indoors really is not a problem. I will continue until a more effective vaccine is developed.

What breaks my heart however is children being sent to school with zero airborne mitigations and school admins that prioritise attendance over health. As a result, schools are infection pits, and children pass it on to their wider family and so it spreads. Yet since every infection is damaging, we should be doing everything we can to minimize multiple infections in our kids. In schools that means ventilation at least, preferably combined with air purifiers, and keep sick children home. COVIDsafetyforschools.org is a great resource - please have a look and ask your children's schools what measures they are taking.

The data is very clear (eg long term sick leave stats, not just in UK, and NHS staff illness absence data) that across the population, illness absence has risen continuously since 2020, and it's not because of vaccines.

You should instead be supportive of your SIL, mask up around her and show understanding. She's certainly not wrong to be cautious. And perhaps consider if it's wise to be blase about catching such novel virus about which we have much more to learn.

There’s a young-ish family living on my street who are like this. They have everything delivered, rarely go out (and are masked when they do) and have two school aged children who have never been back to school since. I suspect they are being ‘home schooled’ officially but this can’t be healthy can it?

I do know (as the children were at my school, but not in my class, prior to lockdown) that there is no underlying cause for this, ie nobody in the family is immunocompromised, so would imagine mental health is the cause here.

It’s no way to live…especially with children. 😢

Crikey you’re a real charmer.

I’ve had long COVID for 2 years. It’s been the most horrific and terrifying time of my life. I was in bed unable to do anything at all for the first year.

Can’t say l blame her.

I am COVID cautious. I wear my N95 100% of the time I'm indoors (except at home). I only eat in outdoor restaurants and cafes. We test whenever anyone in the household is ill. My children don't get taken to crowded ball pit type places but we do visit indoor things with masks on at non peak times.

COVID is a neuro invasive, vascular disease, and it's clear that every infection, however mild, leaves a mark on the body. It also damages the immune system and can cause cognitive decline. Just because the initial symptoms are mild doesn't mean you have been undamaged. Mainstream media has chosen to avoid the topic but there are articles highlighting the research/evidence on cognitive damage, risk of heart attack and strokes, immune system damage, long COVID etc if you look. And over 400,000 peer reviewed papers.

It makes sense to avoid catching it repeatedly and wearing a mask indoors really is not a problem. I will continue until a more effective vaccine is developed.

What breaks my heart however is children being sent to school with zero airborne mitigations and school admins that prioritise attendance over health. As a result, schools are infection pits, and children pass it on to their wider family and so it spreads. Yet since every infection is damaging, we should be doing everything we can to minimize multiple infections in our kids. In schools that means ventilation at least, preferably combined with air purifiers, and keep sick children home. COVIDsafetyforschools.org is a great resource - please have a look and ask your children's schools what measures they are taking.

The data is very clear (eg long term sick leave stats, not just in UK, and NHS staff illness absence data) that across the population, illness absence has risen continuously since 2020, and it's not because of vaccines.

You should instead be supportive of your SIL, mask up around her and show understanding. She's certainly not wrong to be cautious. And perhaps consider if it's wise to be blase about catching such novel virus about which we have much more to learn.

Well, would you invite the families of the air India crash to a session talking about a phobia of flying? Or maybe having someone who had a limb amputated after being bitten by a poisonous spider as the lead speaker at an arachnophobia conference?

The person in question is irrationally scared of a virus that is usually not much more than a cold, and vanishingly rarely worse than flu to the point of becoming a recluse and ruining her husbands life. This "its vascular!!!" and I'm the 0.001% who got unlucky, poor me, lets live in our cupboard under the stairs stuff just isn't rational. Sorry if that triggers you. Boohoo.

wow everanewbie 'sob stories and claims about long covid '? You sound like a nice person

All viruses are novel. That’s because they evolve. Covid was a coronavirus and humans have been living with coronavirus since forever.

As for long term damage - you cite the worst case scenarios but forget how we and our immune systems have evolved and adapted over time. The immune system, like every part of our existed, must be educated. To be educated means a steady exposure to common pathogens so the body can clock up immunity.

It’s not viruses that make children really sick (unless they are already immunocompromised through, say, treatment for leukaemia), it’s lack of proper nutrition, lack of sunlight, lack of interaction with sensible adults, lack of exercise, lack of sleep. It’s also being forced to live in damp, cramped and mould-infested accommodation.

It wasn’t so long ago children used to die of asthma attacks because they were cold, malnourished and central heating didn’t exist.

I feel like some people, in the complete absence of threats like war, poverty, abuse, malnutrition, substandard housing have lost all perspective.

Maybe the OP needs to point out to her sister that she is already living like she’s got long covid anyway.

I am COVID cautious. I wear my N95 100% of the time I'm indoors (except at home). I only eat in outdoor restaurants and cafes. We test whenever anyone in the household is ill. My children don't get taken to crowded ball pit type places but we do visit indoor things with masks on at non peak times.

COVID is a neuro invasive, vascular disease, and it's clear that every infection, however mild, leaves a mark on the body. It also damages the immune system and can cause cognitive decline. Just because the initial symptoms are mild doesn't mean you have been undamaged. Mainstream media has chosen to avoid the topic but there are articles highlighting the research/evidence on cognitive damage, risk of heart attack and strokes, immune system damage, long COVID etc if you look. And over 400,000 peer reviewed papers.

It makes sense to avoid catching it repeatedly and wearing a mask indoors really is not a problem. I will continue until a more effective vaccine is developed.

What breaks my heart however is children being sent to school with zero airborne mitigations and school admins that prioritise attendance over health. As a result, schools are infection pits, and children pass it on to their wider family and so it spreads. Yet since every infection is damaging, we should be doing everything we can to minimize multiple infections in our kids. In schools that means ventilation at least, preferably combined with air purifiers, and keep sick children home. COVIDsafetyforschools.org is a great resource - please have a look and ask your children's schools what measures they are taking.

The data is very clear (eg long term sick leave stats, not just in UK, and NHS staff illness absence data) that across the population, illness absence has risen continuously since 2020, and it's not because of vaccines.

You should instead be supportive of your SIL, mask up around her and show understanding. She's certainly not wrong to be cautious. And perhaps consider if it's wise to be blase about catching such novel virus about which we have much more to learn.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

thanks so much for responding and I'm really pleased to hear that things have got better for you :)
I'd very much appreciate the webinars
Very interesting what you say about your brain's coping mechanism kind of making it all worse
I was thinking of acupuncture for all this but not opposed to hypno/whatever. Not had it before but will try anything!!

I'm not at an increased risk of catching Covid or the flu, but I am at an increased risk of them being severe if I do catch them.
During the pandemic I was having dental treatment and oral surgery and had to regularly use Corsodyl mouthwash; it turns out that rinsing and gargling with salt water, Corsodyl or Listerine gives some protection against Covid. I do it before I go out and when I get home, I also haven't had a serious cold or the flu since I started doing it.
Tell your SIL, if you google there are multiple studies and articles.

She needs psychology. I suggest she goes to her Gp and asks for a referral. Psychology will be able to help her identify what she is scared of and how to gradually confront her fears, ultimately building her confidence and resilience.