‘Lacks etiquette’ - wouldn’t say it about a man.

I agree, it's complaining about the situation that's possibly sexist, not the phrase itself. Encourage him to be more flexible/understanding.

Etiquette is a system of behaviour. As Imentioned upthread he should have said lacked good etiquette or lacked manners.

It doesn’t strike me as an old-fashioned phrase - I’ve never heard it, and I’m pretty old.
Someone lacking manners, OTOH….

IMO he was misusing the word ‘etiquette’ - probably doesn’t properly understand the meaning.

I am not entirely sure it's the phrasing that's the problem so much as his outrage that a (female) colleague had to briefly disappear to handle an emergency. I can't help but think that if a male colleague had had ot do that, he would have simply accepted it.

I also wonder what type of emergency - was it a childcare/personal issue? in which case, he's more likely to be more irritated (and also, it's more likely to happen to a woman because somehow, while working from home, men still manage to absent themselves from family needs and drama in a way that women can't....)

Sorry - I think you are reading too much into a word. It's isn't a word I would use, and I also wouldn't have complained about someone's dealing with an emergency. But I also don't see that it is sexist. I might have responded that the emergency thing was a one-off and it's a bit unfair to complain about it. But IU also think the time for saying something has now gone and you make too much of it if you drag up the subject again.

If it happens again, then you deal with it immediately.

I would, and have said that about men. Not just women. YABU.

I would have explored that with him. IME men get praised for managing everything, so the feedback would be "even though he had an emergency, he got back to me", women are just expected to spin plates, but fault is still found by some people.

Lacks etiquette is a very old fashioned phrase. While you’re right that it wouldn’t be used for a man, there are other phrases that are for men like Neanderthal which are used.

Is the sexism because she had a home/family emergency and her partner is unlikely to be doing the same as her at his work?

What does he claim she should have done instead? To claim that his personal convenience should come before an emergency sounds extremely arrogant. I think you need to point that out to him.

He doesn't understand the meaning of the word etiquette. Buy him a copy of Just Good Manners and leave it on his desk.

Edited to add: Actually, on reflection, it depends on how she dialled off the call- if she literally said " I'll be right back" with no further explanation, then that was a bit rude (or lacking in etiquette- however you want to put it). If she explained the situation briefly before dialling off, then less so. Honestly, I think people are getting a bit worn down by WFH and people constantly ducking out of calls to receive parcels, let the dog walker in etc. so possibly are not as gracious as they might be in these circumstances.

It's not sexist, it seems like a "polite" way of saying he thought someone was rude. Though why he didn't just say rude is weird.
Nobody was being rude, imo.

I ve used the phrase or similar about a man. I don't think this is a gender issue.

I ld ask the complainer to elaborate on why he thinks that. I ld also ask: is it fair for a colleague to occasionally prioritise a genuine emergency over an internal work call that can be rescheduled?

Is it polite to be understanding in the circumstances. Maintaining flexibility and collegialuty is important.

It possibly is an ego issue.

It rings a bell of ‘if we must accept women in the workplace they should have the decency to act like Men!’ to me!

or the subtext of ‘she took a phone call from her child’s school- SEE THIS, This is why women shouldn’t get promoted.

would he be irritated to be treated the same way by a man? Tgats the question

He’s a bit of pig. He’s rough. Can be a bully. All things I’ve heard about men at work.

The fact that he even felt the need to comment on this after the event is what lacks etiquette, empathy etc.

Any half decent human would realise that taking a brief emergency call is sometimes needed. The appropriate response is 'no problem, call me back when you can'.

Sounds very old fashioned rather than sexist to me.

I would think HE was the arse. Not her. Who does he think he is - the king?

How old is he? Do you like him as a work colleague or does he annoy you in general?

It's the "to me" that's more telling imo. And honestly I can't believe he's running to his manager telling tales about this. She explained at the time and they continued the call.

He’s way overreacting but I don’t get the sexism angle. It sounds like he means work place etiquette which is just a phrase and isn’t gender specific. In my old job my female colleague used to say it about a chap that sat near us who was fond of eating fish and chips at his desk.

i think he would of said much worse to a man
lacks etiquette in the work place is a politer way of saying unprofessional

I don't think saying someone "lacks etiquette " is grammatically correct? He could say "lacks good etiquette " or "lacks manners". I'd personally pick him up on that at your catch up, as a priority...

Anyway, as you were..

No they wouldn’t. But they might still disagree worth the behaviour (possibly not!) and phrase it as ‘it was inappropriate’.