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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you like to round up to £1? No I fucking wouldnt.

384 replies

DavAtTheCampaignForMoreBankHolidays · 31/08/2025 15:28

I cant be the only one who is getting increasingly pissed off at being asked to donate 20p everytine I pay for something?

The recent one in a charity shop was being asked to round up to the nearest pound AND then being asked to donate 25p. In fact, it wasnt even asked, it was "shall I round it up?" and "press green to say yes".

I always end up feeling really tight but apart from the fact that it would cost a fortune if I gave a donation every time I was asked, I really resent that businesses get tax relief for this whilst also bragging that they donated £x to charity.

OP posts:
SprayWhiteDung · 03/09/2025 18:01

LoyalMember · 03/09/2025 15:44

I was in the bar in Glasgow Airport yesterday on the way to Gran Canaria and when I paid by card the terminal display asked if I wanted to add a gratuity. £14.50 for a pint and a vodka and coke, so no I fucking wouldn't. I pressed X to dismiss it it every single time.

The people who set these things up really have no self-awareness whatsoever, do they?!

I guess they're deliberately hoping to snare foreigners coming the other way who are in holiday mood and/or don't know our customs and aren't familiar with the currency yet.

TalkToTheHand123 · 03/09/2025 18:01

I'm quite glad as I don't usually give and it's easy to do.

CathyFitzs · 03/09/2025 17:35

I couldn’t agree more and whichever company is asking gains kudos for ‘ their’ / actually ‘our’- charitable donations!!

LoyalMember · 03/09/2025 15:44

I was in the bar in Glasgow Airport yesterday on the way to Gran Canaria and when I paid by card the terminal display asked if I wanted to add a gratuity. £14.50 for a pint and a vodka and coke, so no I fucking wouldn't. I pressed X to dismiss it it every single time.

SprayWhiteDung · 03/09/2025 14:13

SweetnsourNZ · 03/09/2025 01:41

I wouldn't think a shop assistant would judge you anyway as most of them couldn't afford to give money away on their wages anyway so no need to feel tight. Don't need excuses. No is a complete sentence.

Most probably wouldn't; but I've encountered a fair few who seem to be personally very passionate about it - and look hurt if you decline.

I was in Savers (owned by Superdrug, as mentioned upthread) the other day and the assistant asked me loudly and very enthusiastically if I would like to give "to charity". He was very friendly but also overbearing, if that makes sense.

Of course, I asked which charity, and he told me Marie Curie, which, as far as I'm aware, isn't one of the objectionable ones, so I said Yes; but only because of the pressure I felt.

It was one of those 'just press green or red' on the card machine (which of course makes a mockery of the whole idea of contactless in the first place); but he leaned over and pressed green 'for me'. If I'd had a 'simple free choice' like some people on here are saying, I'd have pressed No.

I don't know if it IS personal enthusiasm on the assistants' part, or whether they get targets that they have to meet or otherwise be chastised? Maybe they've been specifically trained to do that, as 'not enough' people press green if they can choose freely and discreetly and don't feel pressured?

Either way, yes you can say NO; but the social pressure/shame is very evident. Look at threads where people go out for a meal and pay the bill as presented at the end without quibble, but are then shamed as 'tightwads' by dining companions if they don't add an extra 10% or whatever as a 'tip' to bump up the wages of people who may well earn the same that they do (except with no tradition or even allowance to accept tips themselves).

SweetnsourNZ · 03/09/2025 01:41

Sunnyscribe · 31/08/2025 15:54

I decline every time with no guilt.

I've got some charities that I donate to every month through direct debit. I donate when friends ask to be sponsored. I buy in charity shops regularly. I am someone who donates to charity so I don't care about declining or what people might think of me.

I'll donate to charity when I decide, not because I'm being pestered at every purchase I make.

I wouldn't think a shop assistant would judge you anyway as most of them couldn't afford to give money away on their wages anyway so no need to feel tight. Don't need excuses. No is a complete sentence.

notedbiscuits · 02/09/2025 21:08

When I used to pay cash at charity shops and something was £2.95, gave them £3 and asked them to keep the change.

I ordered meals at a touchscreen and the bill came to £19.05. Asked me to round it up to £20 or £25. No thank you

NeedyLimeMember · 02/09/2025 21:05

I've always chosen the no option since this started, so I do it on autopilot now and barely even notice it ask me. Although it does particularly grind my gears when asked if I want to donate, without specifying a cause. I tend to be vvery sceptical of a lot of charities.

Sparklesandspandexgallore · 02/09/2025 20:49

Sorry about the typos.

Sparklesandspandexgallore · 02/09/2025 20:48

Ironically I’ve been approached twice on my lunch break today. Both times I was deep in conversation both a colleague and both times we walked as far away from the chuggers as possible. Yet still they walked towards us and interrupted our conversation both times. Incredibly rude.
We both ignored them but they are incredibly rude. A man they approached straight after us, he was elderly and walking slowly, had to physically put his hands up and shake his head to show his much he really didn’t want to be harrassed by them.
They are an absolute pain in the backside.

princessofdarknesss · 02/09/2025 20:13

My partner isn’t English, and although he’s completely fluent when a chugger approaches he adopts a confused face and does his best ‘I don’t speak London’. It both impresses and amuses me because they leave us in peace.

Chompingatthebeat · 02/09/2025 18:02

axolotlfloof · 02/09/2025 09:22

Sadly you are just hastening their death if you give money.
Give to a homelessness charity or buy them food.
People with an addiction are incapable of making good choices

Not all homeless people have addictions

dynamiccactus · 02/09/2025 18:01

SprayWhiteDung · 02/09/2025 10:20

They're usually not, though - they're specifically trained not to be.

I mean, yes, you can point-blank ignore them as they speak directly to you, but they rely on people not wanting to appear rude or socially awkward.

Why should folk feel they have to stare at the ground and rush out of the shop hurriedly, without making eye-contact with anybody - even just to wish a friendly-looking stranger a good morning or make a passing comment on the weather? It's a normal human thing to do and difficult and unpleasant to feel restricted from doing by people wanting money from you.

In the end it definitely helps to not be a people pleaser! I am not. I don't (generally) care what strangers think of me, and I am definitely not giving money if people try to use chugging tactics, whether at the till or chuggers themselves.

dynamiccactus · 02/09/2025 17:59

TriciaA1991 · 02/09/2025 15:49

The ones that bug me more are the people like (I am naming this ne as the man in question was a real bully) The Dogs Trust. Stopped me in the street and really would not let me go. I said I had four charities I already donated to monthly and I was not interested and he bombarded me for half an hour. Every time I tried to move, he moved to stop me. In the end I had to turn and go back the way I had come from to get away. He ran after me at which point I asked him for his card - with my phone out - and told him I was going to report him for threatening behaviour - at which point he let me leave,
These people are presumably on commission and are just ville. I do strongly feel this is a task that should just be done by volunteers!

How on earth did you put up with that for half an hour? I'd have said, I am not donating, get out of my way NOW and started shouting if he didn't move.

You get the impression that some are really horrible bullies.

They're often at the railway stations. It's annoying if your train is late as you may be around to be hassled by them more than once or walk around more so end up walking past them more than once and trying to avoid eye contact.

dynamiccactus · 02/09/2025 17:55

DavAtTheCampaignForMoreBankHolidays · 02/09/2025 09:18

Dont get into a discussion with them. Just say no thank you and keep walking. If they insist, just ignore them.

A few years ago I used to go for a run straight after work. This would involve running past some chuggers. One twat started running alongside me thinking he was being cute so I agreed that if he ran with me and finished the run with me Id set up a maximum dd with him.

I was quite overweight and slow and he obviously didnt expect much from me. However, I was training for a marathan and running 14 miles that night. Needless to say he didnt run all the way with me.

He'd obviously told the other chuggers because they all left me alone when I was running after that. 🤣

Brilliant! I love that!

SprayWhiteDung · 02/09/2025 17:27

Sunnysideup999 · 02/09/2025 14:03

Same. I like to do due diligence on charities first . This is why I dislike ‘opportunistic’ charity - chuggers, door to door charity reps etc. It shouldn’t be something you do on a whim - no matter how small the donation

Same here. I just think it's so arrogant for them to expect you to sign up to a commitment to paying them money every month, without even dreaming of offering you information about their structure, accounts, payroll, key projects etc.

However, if you tried asking the chugger for more financial information about the charity that they supposedly represent, they wouldn't have a clue. They're always 'passionate about' whichever charity happens to come up in their assignment today.

Charities that get funding from the lottery or government grants have to jump through loads of forensic hoops before they're given a penny. Why would the public - who collectively give a lot more than the grant-giving organisations - not be deemed worthy of this basic info before making their giving decisions?

Applejack22 · 02/09/2025 15:57

I feel exactly the same, I think to myself why doesn’t the f@&£ing CEO of Tesco donate one of the 9 million pounds he earned last year alone to charity and stop trying to force us to donate when most of us are just about making ends meet! Grrr

TriciaA1991 · 02/09/2025 15:49

The ones that bug me more are the people like (I am naming this ne as the man in question was a real bully) The Dogs Trust. Stopped me in the street and really would not let me go. I said I had four charities I already donated to monthly and I was not interested and he bombarded me for half an hour. Every time I tried to move, he moved to stop me. In the end I had to turn and go back the way I had come from to get away. He ran after me at which point I asked him for his card - with my phone out - and told him I was going to report him for threatening behaviour - at which point he let me leave,
These people are presumably on commission and are just ville. I do strongly feel this is a task that should just be done by volunteers!

Cloanie · 02/09/2025 14:12

It’s repellant to me to be harassed ‘ for charity’ so often. I mean, seriously, are you joking! Get money from the supermarkets profits, not from broke little me. Jeebus.

Sunnysideup999 · 02/09/2025 14:03

EveryDayisFriday · 01/09/2025 17:19

I never do this.

I refuse to donate to any charity that I haven't vetted its finances first. I will donate to certain charities but even then they get on my nerves asking for more and more.

I think that some charities are important but I also think that there are a lot of charities that are scams or spend the majority of their income on their overheads and provide very little to their end users. I believe that similar charities should merge to gain economies of scale.

Same. I like to do due diligence on charities first . This is why I dislike ‘opportunistic’ charity - chuggers, door to door charity reps etc. It shouldn’t be something you do on a whim - no matter how small the donation

Jigglypuffff · 02/09/2025 13:18

Thing about chuggers is, I was told they get paid a portion of your donation, they are funded on commission. Charity presumably gets more if you go and set something up online. I would never want to pay the salaries of these annoying people! But if they are blocking your way, causing annoyance (I sometimes feel like I am being harassed), a word of complaint to any businesses you might be avoiding as a result of their presence will get them moved on.

Hollyhobbi · 02/09/2025 13:04

Welcometoshowbusiness · 02/09/2025 12:25

It’s in McDonalds but that’s the only place I’ve seen it in Ireland.

I haven’t been in McDonalds for years so hadn’t seen it yet.

CatsnCoffee · 02/09/2025 12:44

mathanxiety · 01/09/2025 19:28

Why do you think people's lives are so empty that they have nothing better to occupy their minds than observing and judging whether the people in front of them in the checkout line decided for or against spending an extra 20p?

And even in the million to one chance that they were tutting, why would the alleged judgement of people you don't know from Adam bother you in the slightest?

I don’t think their lives are empty; I just know it’s easy to notice what the person in front is doing without actively seeking to do so.
It’s not an issue for me personally, but it could cause anxiety to some people.

Welcometoshowbusiness · 02/09/2025 12:25

Hollyhobbi · 02/09/2025 11:42

I don't think I've ever seen this in Ireland apart from in Dealzs? Anyway our groceries cost enough as it is! Is it in Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales as well as England?

It’s in McDonalds but that’s the only place I’ve seen it in Ireland.

Hollyhobbi · 02/09/2025 11:42

I don't think I've ever seen this in Ireland apart from in Dealzs? Anyway our groceries cost enough as it is! Is it in Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales as well as England?