To ask for positive stories of mixed sex siblings

I have an older DD and a younger DS. 2 years between them. They’re thick as thieves and have the best time together and will play together for hours. They’re still primary age so I imagine it’ll change as they grow, but I hope the foundation they have will mean there will always be a closeness there for them.

I’ve only got 1 sibling, a brother , we didn’t really get on until I moved out of home , but now both in our 40s we text at least a couple of times a week , and see each other weekly . We share the same humour and genuinely enjoy his company , although we fought like cat and dog before then he’s always have my back and vice versa.
I dont think gender plays a part whether or not siblings get on , just the luck of the draw, having said that I think sibling rivalry is less between opposite genders in my experience/ opinion .

I have two boys and they are at each other constantly. Would love to know when this special close bond appears please

I get it OP and don’t think it’s bizarre or that you need help or anything like that. I felt like this quite strongly when I was pregnant with my second (and the same as you - had a boy first and wanted another boy). In my case that’s what I got but I’m sure I would have loved to have a girl if that had been the case.

I do love having two the same sex but it does seem to me just from observing other families that it’s slightly easier to avoid rivalry and competition with opposite sex siblings. Obviously it still comes down to parenting, but ‘warring brothers’ is a cliche older than human history for a reason - from Cain and Abel to William and Harry!

My eldest are boy then girl and 18 months apart - they were really close as little children, until DC2 became more orientated around friends and DS1 noticed he also had a little brother who was a potential playmate not just "the baby" and he and DS2 became inseparable.

Now they're young adults and teenagers they all get on well and share private jokes - the boys are closer but DD has her own very busy social and work life and a long term partner, and her own place whilst the boys are that little bit younger and together more due to still living at home.

I have a sister who's guts I hated until I was in my 40s, when I realised the problem was how our parents set us up (unintentionally) rather than her as a person. I don't think two the same sex is necessarily a guarantee of closeness.

Sex doesn’t mean they will get on.
My sister’s 2 DS really don’t get on. They love each other but dislike each other and they have nothing in common. The eldest has been saying for years he’d rather have had a dsis.
My SIL has 2 DD who actively hate each other and they are 18 & 20. They have never been friends!
My friend has 2 DD & 1DS and the 2 DD don’t get on either but the eldest DD and the DS do.
You can’t predict any sibling relationships. It’s about their personality and what they end up having in common.

I had one of each, they always got on brilliantly and still do. DP has three of the same gender and as adults only two get on.

I have DD 21, DS 19 and DS 15 and they are all very close, and have been through out childhood. Just been on holiday with DD and younger DS and they get on so well. Older two at same uni and see each other all the time.

Ten years between mine- DS the elder. He’s really good with his little sister- loving and protective. No squabbles or jealousy.

Get a life

Really bizzare. I have one of each with a big age gap and they are incredibly close. My ds is the protective and gentle older brother, my dd is the feisty yet very caring baby sister.
One of each is really the best of both worlds.
My db has 2 girls and I know he would love a boy too.
My best friend has 2 boys and yearns for a girl too.
Having each is such a wonderful experience

Surely it's great to have one of each? Best of both worlds and there's no guarantee that they will get on whatever the gender.

You’re up set because you’re have … checks OP… a family? That baby 2 is the opposite sex of baby 1? For which there was a 50/50 chance?

Good grief. Today’s sense of entitlement astounds me.

OP I can see a lot of people have said how weird and bizarre this thought process is but I wanted to come on and say I do completely understand how you’re feeling and that I was really similar. My first was a boy (I had no preference towards either boy or girl), and we wanted a second without a big age gap so when I found out our second was on the way I was really hoping it would be another boy as my perception is also that same sex siblings will be closer. My second turned out to be a girl and she is the absolute light of my life but yes I still think that the chances are that they won’t be as close as they grow up as two girls or two boys would be, and yes it does make me a bit sad because that was one of the main reasons I wanted two. We don’t have cousins either side so there aren’t loads of children in the family which is why I want them to be close to one another growing up. This really doesn’t make me feel like I’m weird or bizarre, just logical and perhaps an over thinker/worrier

@Mushroo Consider seeking mental health support because whilst you are able to acknowledge that the thoughts seem unreasonable, if it were me, I'd want to ensure I challenged these thoughts before baby is born. The grass is not greener on the other side just because it looks that way from a distance' Pregnancy does weird things to the mind and you need to discuss the thoughts and consider possibilities, that having 2 children of opposite sex is as perfect as having 2 of the same (not to mention the seemingly loads of genders that are recognised in law today.) The basic advice is look after your mental health before, during and after this pregnancy.

My oldest son and my daughter have 7 years between them and are best buds

Having a small age gap does help

My boy and girl adore each other. At 2 and 4 they're best mates.

I was hoping for one of each because I get on with my own brother so well!

I have two the same and worry about them falling out when they're older and feeling like they're in competition with each other.

OP I understand where you're coming from.
I have an older brother and he truly is my best friend in the world. We grew up really close, and had our own world with the real truths between us, we always helped each other out and told each other stuff our parents had no idea about. We still are very close, have been living in different countries for a very, very long time but speak on the phone a few times a week and see each as often as we can either visit each other or in other countries. I honestly think we are closer to each other than we are to our (wonderful) parents.
One of my grandmother had a younger brother, both lived well into their 90s and have been very close all their lives.
Various other relatives are either from one child families, have same sex siblings or have more than one sibling.

With my first baby I ony wanted a boy. My ideal would have been first a boy then second baby either a boy or a girl (just because in my mind boys are easier long term and I get on much better with boys and men than I do with girls and women so 2 boys best scenario. Boy then girl a replica of my own experience so very good.). I absolutely did not want a girl as a first baby. My nightmare scenario would have been 2 girls purely based on my experience of girlfriends with sister siblings when growing up, most of them seemed to always bicker and have some drama going on.
I won't lie, I was disappointed in my mind to have a girl as a first baby. But we bonded instantly and has been a true joy having her through all the growing up stages. Before baby no. 2 I wasn't sure I wanted a second child because she was my world in so many ways.
Second baby was a boy. They are really close and get on so, so well it is really beautiful to see them together.
I was lucky that both children have been easy at all stages growing up and have turned into such lovely people. Hand on heart, if me and DH drop dead today, these two siblings will be absolutely fine. Both capable and strong. I believed this to have been the case as soon as they turned teenagers.
The thing is, parenting and the home environment plus the child's personality will shape siblings' relationships. Their sex doesn't matter (despite my own earlier reservations).

Thank you and I hope it helps. As a child I remember them as always being good friends in a very real sense (he was a good friend to me too). It had a big impact on my desire for 2 children (I was an only, has it’s benefits too) and I always hope they’ll have the same. I can think of lots of opposite sex siblings who have great adult relationships.

I wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy and that your 2 will have all you could wish for.

My DD and DS were very close growing up, no jealousy, not much(!) competitiveness.
They had similar interests growing up, wanted to go to same places, see same films etc,
It worked really well, they are a bit less close now they are in early 20s living their own lives but still got on really well and would be there for each other in a drop of a hat.

I have a brother and a sister and growing up I was much closer to my brother than my sister as we fought like cat and dog, mainly due to having to share a bedroom! But we are closer now, particularly since DC.

People often stereotype bringing up boys and bringing up girls but tbh I didn't think there was a difference, it's just every child is an individual-they all have their moments!