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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be surprised by the names of the “posh kids” at DDs school

368 replies

marilee · 31/08/2025 02:55

Hi all, my DD just started primary 1. The catchment area for her new school is super mixed with all the nicest houses in the town but also 2 council areas so a real mix. We live in a council flat, I can’t say I’ve rubbed shoulders with the more middle class half of the town and I grew up in a firmly working class area so this is the first time in my life I’m properly mixing with this group (I know that’s awful but it’s just how life has been for me so far).

I don’t know why but I was expecting all the posh kids to have more extravagant names but almost every single one of them is just a very basic name (James, Harry, Anna, Clara, Emily, Emma etc.). While the names I’d normally have associated as being more “posh” are actually the names of the kids from my area (Rafferty, Arabella, Florence, Theodore).

AIBU to be shocked by this? Is this normal or a little regional quirk?

OP posts:
Y2ker · 31/08/2025 10:40

LessOfThis · 31/08/2025 07:10

We all know exactly what you mean and people pretending they don’t are being disingenuous. In my area working class kids are still called Ruby, Amelia, Alfie, Callum etc. Posher kids are Raffie, Felix, Martha, Sebastian.

Their intrinsic worth as human beings is not affected.

I think there are so many regional and cultural variations though. The posh names you've listed there are absolutely used by un posh people here 😆.

I live in quite an affluent town but there is still a class mix and everyone either uses completely average names or else slightly whacky ones of they want something a bit different.

The poshest family I know called their child Millie.

Thepeopleversuswork · 31/08/2025 10:39

ItsnotnearlyChristmas · 31/08/2025 09:06

The truly posh all go by a different name to the one they were given anyway. Either daft nicknames or some other name entirely.

Yes truly posh people quite often have a given name which is very conventional and austere (Catherine or James), then a ubiquitous nickname which is straight out of Evelyn Waugh.

Among the posh set at my university (which I wasn’t part of), there was a Chimpy, a Minky and a Scruffs. No one knew what their actual names were.

Again, something which you can only get away with if you’re very secure, socially.

Catpiece · 31/08/2025 10:39

I’m working class with probably the most posh timeless name you can think of.

BellRock1234 · 31/08/2025 10:37

PrincessFrederica · 31/08/2025 10:22

Sadly the "fundamental" differences are often to do with opportunities outside of school that need paying for, music lessons, dance classes, educational trips.

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The outcomes are massively different, but the kids lining up aged 4 or 5, going into P1 are the just same, and mix irrespective of background.

Bambamhoohoo · 31/08/2025 10:37

Moresettingspuzzles · 31/08/2025 09:59

Pretty obvious what I meant. Like the comment above this one said they aren't calling their children Tarquin charlmondey Warner. They don't want to draw excess attention to their children and have them be bullied for being "posh" hence they give them regular names. Even the royals name their kids William Harry and George etc.

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I mean, there have only ever been a handful of tarquin charlmondey walker types per generation in history though haven’t there? It’s not like its a surprise they don’t exist in anyone’s day to day life.

Heggettypeg · 31/08/2025 10:36

GenieGenealogy · 31/08/2025 09:34

I also think it is relevant that the Savannah, Archie and Lilibet mentioned as part of the Royals all had/have one parent who is not British. Peter Phillip's wife was Canadian, Meghan is American.

Wasn't "Lilibet" originally a royal family nickname for "Elizabeth"? I don't think it was used as a name in its own right before the present holder, though.

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 31/08/2025 10:35

PrincessFrederica · 31/08/2025 10:26

Literally no one sounds like Dick Van Dyke out of Mary Poppins. That accent was so bad it was practically Australian.

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Exactly my point!! 😂😂

Bubblesgun · 31/08/2025 10:32

tygertygers · 31/08/2025 05:08

I will never understand the English obsession with names and class. So glad I moved away and am free of that nonsense. “working class names” FFS

Wholeheartedly agree. Thank you thats refreshing. Glad i moved too, and so glad we had our revolution in 1789!
i love being a republican, yes like everything it has its flaws, but we dont this class obsessed population. Horrid and suffocating!

maddiemookins16mum · 31/08/2025 10:29

The ‘posh’ names you’re thinking of will be the upper class wains at private school.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 31/08/2025 10:28

Why are English people so obsessed with "the classes", it's...er a bit, err, classless

babyproblems · 31/08/2025 10:28

I think it’s ok to think this but not say it 😂
I will say someone I know who is very ‘aspirational’ let’s say, has called her baby Owen which shocked me because I always thought it was the most un posh name going. Everyone is different!!!

PumpkinSparkleFairy · 31/08/2025 10:26

Ahh love the posters who call any identification of class signifiers “judgy” 😂

As we all know, Britain is a classless society!

PrincessFrederica · 31/08/2025 10:26

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 31/08/2025 10:24

Because its a 'stereotype'
Not everyone from London sounds like Dick Van Dyke out of Mary Poppins! 🙄🙄

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Literally no one sounds like Dick Van Dyke out of Mary Poppins. That accent was so bad it was practically Australian.

Bubblesgun · 31/08/2025 10:25

Clawdes · 31/08/2025 03:23

That’s how it goes OP. Aspirational names are passed down the classes.

Clara is firmly working class nowadays.

🤣🤣🤣 what a stupid thing to say. Clara is a french name originally.

show me your lack of class without telling me

@marilee i think names goes in fashion. There was a time where Bear, Poppy, Apple and Moise, etc were the hype for the celebs,
maybe the classical names are coming back. I can see more regal names (Theodore) becoming trendier.

i personally love the classical names coming back and being used wider.

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 31/08/2025 10:24

marilee · 31/08/2025 02:55

Hi all, my DD just started primary 1. The catchment area for her new school is super mixed with all the nicest houses in the town but also 2 council areas so a real mix. We live in a council flat, I can’t say I’ve rubbed shoulders with the more middle class half of the town and I grew up in a firmly working class area so this is the first time in my life I’m properly mixing with this group (I know that’s awful but it’s just how life has been for me so far).

I don’t know why but I was expecting all the posh kids to have more extravagant names but almost every single one of them is just a very basic name (James, Harry, Anna, Clara, Emily, Emma etc.). While the names I’d normally have associated as being more “posh” are actually the names of the kids from my area (Rafferty, Arabella, Florence, Theodore).

AIBU to be shocked by this? Is this normal or a little regional quirk?

Because its a 'stereotype'
Not everyone from London sounds like Dick Van Dyke out of Mary Poppins! 🙄🙄

HarrietBond · 31/08/2025 10:22

MasterBeth · 31/08/2025 09:43

How is Louis remotely in the same ball park as James?

Louis is flamboyant and continental. French, even! James is plain, porridge with salt. Very different tone.

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Louis is a derivative of Ludwig and it’s been a German royal name for centuries. The current royals have it in their names mostly as tribute to Louis Mountbatten.

LaughingCat · 31/08/2025 10:22

ShineLuceeeee · 31/08/2025 04:42

I have found this:

  • The genuinely posh people don't go for overly fancy names but traditional older names (eg James - lovely name btw)
  • The nouveau riche/upwardly mobile go for names that are OTT posh (eg Atticus, Hugo)
  • More working class tend to go for names that were normal posh but then have gone out of fashion (Arabella is a perfect eg)

This - grew up firmly upper middle class and the posh kids had solid names, middle class splits between similarly solid names and off the wall types (for the woo-woo ones looking to send their kid to the local Steiner school like me 😆). Aspirational names that people think are posh tended to come more from nouveau riche or working class backgrounds.

Not seen that change over time or geographically tbf, but obviously it doesn’t hold true for everyone.

PrincessFrederica · 31/08/2025 10:22

BellRock1234 · 31/08/2025 10:20

The lovely thing about schools like this is that the kids see that there is absolutely no fundamental difference between the friend from the council house, and the friend from the 5-bed detached.

It's nice if the parents learn the same.

Sadly the "fundamental" differences are often to do with opportunities outside of school that need paying for, music lessons, dance classes, educational trips.

BellRock1234 · 31/08/2025 10:20

The lovely thing about schools like this is that the kids see that there is absolutely no fundamental difference between the friend from the council house, and the friend from the 5-bed detached.

It's nice if the parents learn the same.

Moresettingspuzzles · 31/08/2025 10:20

Bambamhoohoo · 31/08/2025 09:55

Absolutely we do need to end this awful behaviour. I am hopeful for a generation who weren’t brought up on “benefits Britain” and demonising teenage mums. But they are being raised by our generation, the worst of which can obviously be seen here.

it’s so emotionally immature too.

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What awful behaviour? These threads are interesting. We don't have to read it if we don't want to I was a mum at 16 who has demonised teen mums?
I was also teased at school for having a "posh" name. Don't be sensitive

PrincessFrederica · 31/08/2025 10:15

Fuckish · 31/08/2025 08:59

The only ‘point’ the OP has made is that she had some preconceptions about the middle classes, though.

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I didn't say she had a point, I said she'd made an interesting observation. Two very different things.

Moresettingspuzzles · 31/08/2025 10:14

OhMaria2 · 31/08/2025 10:11

Oh pleeeeease. What a disgusting post.

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That poster obviously isn't aware of the antics that go on at top boarding schools 😬who's going to tell them

OhMaria2 · 31/08/2025 10:14

LessOfThis · 31/08/2025 09:57

“Wealthy people aren’t naming their kids Raffie”

Think I probably know more about the people I know than you do!

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You might want to visit a council estate and tell your friends how many children are called Raffie, I dont think they'll be pleased given the tone of this thread

OhMaria2 · 31/08/2025 10:11

Wishingplenty · 31/08/2025 07:15

I agree that posh kids can be snobby, but at the very worst they will just ignore, or perhaps some name calling without causing physical pain. They do bully different to working class kids, but the threat of physical harm is more real in the working class. Both forms of bullying is horrible, but let's not pretend the rough working class are capable of a lot worst with often the parents joining in.

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Oh pleeeeease. What a disgusting post.

Suednymph · 31/08/2025 10:10

I am in Ireland myself and just found out today that my kids have old money posh names. They will be utterly delighted sarcasm when I tell them lol