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To think BF is jealous of my friendships

72 replies

These · 30/08/2025 22:03

I, 29, have been with my BF, also 29, for nearly 2 years (we don’t live together). I also have a few close friends I’ve known since school and whenever tell him about one of my meet ups with them, he just has to make an unfunny joke about me being a secret lesbian. He also says negative things about my friends all the time like if I pick my a friend up he’ll call her a freeloader and warn me to be careful of her because she only cares about what she can take from me. However he’ll flip the switch if one of them comments something nice on my Facebook or Instagram and make her out to be a lesbian who secretly fancies me. This is a very common occurrence, him accusing me or my friends of being lesbians because we’re good friends and it’s getting boring.

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 31/08/2025 08:55

Say ‘it’s boring having you call it friend and I lesbians all the time if you do it again I’ll dump you’ and follow through please

pictoosh · 31/08/2025 08:54

How unpleasant of him.

jeaux90 · 31/08/2025 08:54

Tedious asshole. Red flag.

Bikergran · 31/08/2025 08:53

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Fuckish · 31/08/2025 08:52

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

And you keep a jealous, insecure, friendless man in your life why???

Silverbirchleaf · 31/08/2025 08:51

Does he actively prevent you seeing them?
For him, is it ongoing banter? Ie, he considers it an ‘in’ joke?
Have you ever called him out on it?
Is he twelve?!

BabyCatFace · 31/08/2025 08:50

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

You're reading this wrong I'm afraid. And if it were the case that he's just jealous - what a sad inadequate prick he would be to resent you having friends because he's too unpleasant to keep any! But it's not that - he's trying to isolate you. Please open your eyes and wise up.

Swiftie1878 · 31/08/2025 08:45

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

You’re not making this sound any better.
He sounds, at best, ridiculously immature and tiresome, but more likely is a controller.
Red flags waving wildly.

DoubtfulCat · 31/08/2025 08:30

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

Envy is a horrible emotion, and if it’s making him spiteful then that also is a bad sign. Why doesn’t he have any friends?

Whichever way you spin this I think it’s a red flag. I would urge you to be very cautious and to really watch his behaviour, his actions and how he speaks to you. It’s not behaviour you would see from a loving, generous partner.

TeeBee · 30/08/2025 22:56

Red flags. Get rid.

GonnaeNoDaeThatJustGonnaeNo · 30/08/2025 22:50

He’s an arsehole

Testerical · 30/08/2025 22:37

Has no friends.

Tries to stop you seeing yours.

Makes sad “jokes” about you being a lesbian.

What do you find attractive about this person?

MySweetMaggie · 30/08/2025 22:27

chipsandpeas · 30/08/2025 22:17

or the i only want to spend all my time cos i love you so much

total bullshit

Exactly. The fact that he has no friends is an added red flag!

MySweetMaggie · 30/08/2025 22:25

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

It may be just that. If you're moving forward with him though, keep the warnings on here in mind.

chipsandpeas · 30/08/2025 22:17

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

or the i only want to spend all my time cos i love you so much

total bullshit

These · 30/08/2025 22:13

@MySweetMaggie I get the impression it’s more because he doesn’t have any friends, he’s envious that I do, rather than him trying to isolate me.

OP posts:
gruebleen · 30/08/2025 22:12

These · 30/08/2025 22:07

It’s usually only the friendships though. He never says anything like that about my family.

For now maybe. But once he's managed to cut you off from your friends, he may move onto isolating you from your family.

Scottishskifun · 30/08/2025 22:10

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
See the comments from your bf for what they are!

MySweetMaggie · 30/08/2025 22:10

The more control he starts to have over your life e.g. moving in or marrying, he will try to cut off your other connections. it's a red flag that he isn't supportive of you having other people in your life.

BellissimoGecko · 30/08/2025 22:09

He sounds unbelievably tedious, immature and dull. I’d bin him.

Also, stopping someone from going out/seeing friends or being critical of said friends is abusive and A Bad Thing.

These · 30/08/2025 22:07

DoubtfulCat · 30/08/2025 22:04

This is a trick used by abusers to isolate you and make you doubt your own judgement.

Just saying.

It’s usually only the friendships though. He never says anything like that about my family.

OP posts:
DoubtfulCat · 30/08/2025 22:04

This is a trick used by abusers to isolate you and make you doubt your own judgement.

Just saying.