To think my friend is ungenerous in only buying herself a concert ticket?

She wants free accommodation. Tell her that doesn’t work for you and she will need to look in hotels.

Sounds like she is going with others from your city that she knows from when she lived there. I love going most places alone, but even I dont want to go to a concert alone so I would be surprised if she is going on her own.

Maybe her friends dont want you to be invited? Do you know them? Though I do then wonder why she doesnt stay with them if this happens to be the case.

As if the op was expecting the friend to shell out hundreds on a ticket 🙄🙄 she obviously meant cheap tickets. A £50 ticket would be nice in exchange for a weeks free bloody food and accommodation!

Is it possible she's sitting at home wondering why you don't want to go to concerts with her anymore, @LoisLaneKent ?

She tells you when she's coming, what concert she wants to see, the dates, you make oblique comments about maybe going yourself and then ... nothing. You don't buy a ticket and you don't go. She may have surmised you don't want to go anymore.

Yes you definitely are. You need to ask her why she’s not inviting you.

It is rude, she should absolutely be inviting. But perhaps because you aren’t saying anything, she is assuming you don’t want to go anyway (you say she’s socially awkward, that could be a factor) so the cycle continues.

Surely this is how it should go:
Your friend calls you and says " Hey Lois, I see Beyoncé is on in your city next month. Do you fancy it?"
If you say yes, she buys 2 tickets and you send her the money for your ticket (or she might treat you - but the important thing is that she's asked you)
If you say no, then she says that she's going to go and can she stay with you. You agree because she's your chum and it will be good to see her
End

Friend: can I stay with you?

You: No.

Well, she's saving maybe £60 a night on a hotel, probably the same in food each day x5-7.
She can and should purchase you a ticket to the gig she's going to.
It's unthoughtful and tbh I'd not be having it. It's happened twice on the trot. It's becoming a habit of her coming to go to a gig and not even inviting you. Is there someone she's going with, or alone?
If someone else, she should stay with them, if alone. I'd feel pretty hurt.

You are being too timid and massively over-thinking this.

Just ask her "can you get me a ticket too please?"

Clearly you've said something in the past that made her think you don't want to go.

Or just say "can you get me a ticket too or shall I buy my own ticket?".

Yes - just be direct. Say you'd like to have gone and next time could she let you know beforehand. If she doesn't suggest buying a ticket for you then, you'll at least know that it's not that she doesn't want to go with you.

This.

If overnight, fair enough, but if she's staying 5-7 days does she contribute at all? Do you go to stay with her reciprocally? If not, I'd be unavailable when these gigs are on. She can get a hotel.

She’s fully using you, but doesn’t want to spend meaningful time with you. Otherwise she’d invite you. Stop saying yes to her week-long stays.

These are 2 separate issues.

If you want to go and see the band, buy yourself a ticket.

If you find it cheeky her asking to stay at yours, and then doing her own thing, don’t have her back to stay

Yes, you’re right. From the title but not the OP.

It seems ambiguous and OP needs to clarify.

My understanding from the title is that OP thinks her friend is ungenerous because she didn’t buy a ticket for OP.

My reading comprehension skills must be up the swanny this morning because I’ve re-read your OP and

she didn’t invite you, you had to ask. She ignored it.

previously, she didn’t invite you and you said you’d like to have been either invited or bought a ticket.

so I see it is not necessarily your expectation that she buys you a ticket.

However, I think this may be where the ambiguity /issue lies.

So just tell her. “ next time, I’d like to be invited to any gigs you go to while staying with me, and I absolutely don’t expect you to pay for my ticket”

Does she go alone or with other people…? Maybe you’d be a spare wheel?

Tell her your busy that week and shell need to find other accommodation

Am I missing something? You visit each other once a year and the host provides accommodation and food. I think that’s already a fair deal, so don’t understand why people say she’s a CF for not buying you a ticket in return for accommodation.

Other than the ticket issue, do you enjoy visiting each other? If the answer is yes, telling her she can’t stay at yours would be cutting your nose to spite your face.

With friends I’ve known for years and it was a group I knew they liked I’d most likely say, X is playing, shall we go? I might buy their tkt as a birthday present say….or we’d each buy our own. I’d also definitely pay for dinner or a take out. If I wanted to see a band they didn’t like I’d feel incredibly awkward just staying and popping out to see the band, and super awkward if it was a band they did like!

it’s weird.

This.
Plus 5-7 days is too long

You already have a reciprocal arrangement and she was a very generous host.

She invited you along.

She’s not in any way taking the piss.

You want to go with her to gigs. It sounds like she sees the visits as not having to spend all your time together. This is easily fixed if you simply say, I’d like to come with you next time to a gig.

However, if you only want to go if she pays for you, then you are the CF.

Does she use you as a base and not really spend time with you? Does she go to the gig with other friends? Do you feel welcome to go along? Is it seated so you would need to get tickets together?

Either she’s using you as a base but not wanting to do stuff with you which is rude or she’s laidback and assumes if you want to come you will get a ticket yourself. I wouldn’t expect to be bought a ticket but I would expect to be included/invited.

Is she going with other friends?