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Original poster

Currently in Turkey, met a guy…

838 replies

theoneortwo · 29/08/2025 21:11

And I know they say ‘people come along when you least expect it’ but I never ever thought this would happen to me.

im 29, British, recently I came out of a long term relationship and I am currently on holiday with my family.

I’ve met a lovely Turkish man whilst here. Completely unexpectedly, he was working on one of the tours we went on 4 days ago.

I know it sounds silly and cliche, but as soon as I saw him it’s like I just knew I needed to get to know him. We didn’t speak much on the trip itself since he was obviously busy working - but after when he was showing us the photos he’d taken, we swapped numbers and have been chatting ever since.

He has asked to take me for dinner tomorrow evening (locally in the resort town we are staying in) my mum is saying go for it, but my dad seems to have reservations and is telling me not to be so stupid and naive..

This man hasn’t shown me any red flags or given me reason to distrust him.

Im kind of in the mindset that I’m here on holiday, it’s probably not going to progress.. so let’s see what happens?

has anybody else ever been in this situation, meeting a guy abroad / getting to know somebody from a different country?

I know there are huge complex loopholes and issues IF we did get to know each other more and develop a relationship - due to distance etc.

would love to know thoughts please, as I’m really in two minds.

Thank you ☺️

OP posts:
Original poster
theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:34

TammyJones · 30/08/2025 09:34

Obviously not.
All just attention seeking.

Show quote history

This wasn’t about attention.

OP posts:
Oioisavaloy27 · 30/08/2025 09:34

Listen to your father he sounds like a sensible man.

Digdongdoo · 30/08/2025 09:34

theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:30

Exactly - it’s wild how the toys are thrown out and I’m called smug now because it actually worked out!

I can confirm my organs are still in my body ( 😳) passport is in tact, and I am happier than ever!

Show quote history

I really don't think you can say it has worked out at this point. You've moved very quickly and don't seem to understand the terms of his visa.
Obviously I hope it does all work out. I've been married to my foreigner (though we didn't meet on holiday) for 12 years now. But you still need to be sensible and cautious. 2 years in the same country isn't long at all really and I don't think you've protected yourself and kids well enough at all. I'd say that wherever he was from.

TammyJones · 30/08/2025 09:34

PiggingBastardPigs · 30/08/2025 09:13

Jesus, haven’t you had your quota of attention yet?

Show quote history

Obviously not.
All just attention seeking.

LochKatrine · 30/08/2025 09:34

theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:30

Exactly - it’s wild how the toys are thrown out and I’m called smug now because it actually worked out!

I can confirm my organs are still in my body ( 😳) passport is in tact, and I am happier than ever!

Show quote history

Why did you feel the need to do this? Was it to expose racism and prejudice?
An AMA might have been quite interesting, did you consider that?

Movinghouseatlast · 30/08/2025 09:33

You think he's never done this before?

My friend met a bus driver in Cyprus.Love of her life bla bla bla. She used to go out there and ride the bus with him for 8 hours a day. Then a different type of ride then he had to go back and 'care for his sick mother'. He was actually married with 4 children who she discovered when she went out to surprise him on a Christmas visit.

Mind you the same woman got engaged on line to a guy living in Dubai who she'd never met. She was shocked when he turned out to be gay.

watertable · 30/08/2025 09:33

and I am happier than ever!

Yes, someone truly happy and fulfilled with their life would typically spend a large proportion of two days in a row arguing online with complete strangers and insisting over and over again that they are so darned happy wouldn't they?

so this really does check out. 😂🫢

Original poster
theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:33

AlpacaMittens · 30/08/2025 09:32

This with bells on 😂

Show quote history

I think to be honest people don’t like being caught out with their small, narrow minded views. Exactly the point I was trying to prove.

OP posts:
AlpacaMittens · 30/08/2025 09:32

OhNoNotSusan · 30/08/2025 09:20

posters are not liking being proved wrong op, it just gets worse

This with bells on 😂

Undoundid · 30/08/2025 09:31

OhNoNotSusan · 30/08/2025 09:27

it wasnt the dad's permission to give

Show quote history

It's not. But if he is the sort to actually believe you should ask, then you should respect the answer.

Original poster
theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:30

AlpacaMittens · 30/08/2025 09:29

@theoneortwo I was about to say just go to dinner, presumably it'll be in a public place, have your wits about you and see for yourself what the deal is. You might have an amazing time, or you might get red flags, just go and decide for yourself.

Glad to see the plot twist!
The resulting toys out of pram of the racist posters is very amusing.

Are your organs all intact OP? Have you checked? What about your passport?

What happened to that PP who was all "hahahaha!!!" about him being Kurdish and used a bunch of laughing emojis as being Kurdish is apparently hilarious?

Exactly - it’s wild how the toys are thrown out and I’m called smug now because it actually worked out!

I can confirm my organs are still in my body ( 😳) passport is in tact, and I am happier than ever!

OP posts:
Poodlelove · 30/08/2025 09:30

Go for dinner , but don't give him your address in the UK or give him money or listen to him if he tells you that you are the one .
My Dad can't be trusted but most Dad's know exactly what this man is up to.

OhNoNotSusan · 30/08/2025 09:30

or this?

AlpacaMittens · 30/08/2025 09:29

@theoneortwo I was about to say just go to dinner, presumably it'll be in a public place, have your wits about you and see for yourself what the deal is. You might have an amazing time, or you might get red flags, just go and decide for yourself.

Glad to see the plot twist!
The resulting toys out of pram of the racist posters is very amusing.

Are your organs all intact OP? Have you checked? What about your passport?

What happened to that PP who was all "hahahaha!!!" about him being Kurdish and used a bunch of laughing emojis as being Kurdish is apparently hilarious?

Original poster
theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:28

BrassedOffTiggy · 30/08/2025 09:27

Beware the local tour guide/barman 😄

Thank goodness he doesn’t look like that 🤣

OP posts:
BrassedOffTiggy · 30/08/2025 09:27

Beware the local tour guide/barman 😄

Currently in Turkey, met a guy…
OhNoNotSusan · 30/08/2025 09:27

Undoundid · 30/08/2025 09:26

He can't be a decent guy if he asked your dad's permission, your dad said no and he cracks on anyway. That means the request of permission was just performative.

it wasnt the dad's permission to give

Cornwallchippy · 30/08/2025 09:27

applepieandapplepie · 30/08/2025 08:20

Didn’t this happen to Deidre on Coronation street in the 90s? 🫣

Yes :) it was a massive storyline! So much so that when I told my workmates I had met a Turkish man on holiday all those years ago they jokingly started calling me Deirdre. Funnily enough I bumped into one of them in town a year or so ago,
when I was with my 19 year old son and she shouted 'Deirdre!!! How's it going ?' He thought she'd just got my name wrong...took quite a lot of explaining 🙈

Undoundid · 30/08/2025 09:26

He can't be a decent guy if he asked your dad's permission, your dad said no and he cracks on anyway. That means the request of permission was just performative.

ChiliFiend · 30/08/2025 09:26

The fact he asked your dad when you are 29 is a red flag for me.

Original poster
theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:26

lotsofpatience · 30/08/2025 09:25

Don't bother. We wouldn't believe you anyway.
Man had a lucky escape anyway.

Show quote history

It sounds like your lots of patience is waring thin…

OP posts:
Monsterara · 30/08/2025 09:26

I have some friends who regularly travel to Turkey, and apparently it’s really common for the men who work there to have flings with tourists. I would be very surprised if you’re the first one he has shown an interest in

Purplethingymebobs · 30/08/2025 09:25

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

lotsofpatience · 30/08/2025 09:25

theoneortwo · 30/08/2025 09:19

I’ve not mentioned why it ended in divorce. That is not something I will disclose here.

Show quote history

Don't bother. We wouldn't believe you anyway.
Man had a lucky escape anyway.

Flomingho · 30/08/2025 09:24

I think this is fine as long as you treat it at face value, a holiday romance. You mention that you are recently out of a long term relationship so getting too involved would be a rebound and you are more than likely not in the right place for a new relationship . Also, just be very wary if he starts asking for money.

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