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Original poster

Currently in Turkey, met a guy…

838 replies

theoneortwo · 29/08/2025 21:11

And I know they say ‘people come along when you least expect it’ but I never ever thought this would happen to me.

im 29, British, recently I came out of a long term relationship and I am currently on holiday with my family.

I’ve met a lovely Turkish man whilst here. Completely unexpectedly, he was working on one of the tours we went on 4 days ago.

I know it sounds silly and cliche, but as soon as I saw him it’s like I just knew I needed to get to know him. We didn’t speak much on the trip itself since he was obviously busy working - but after when he was showing us the photos he’d taken, we swapped numbers and have been chatting ever since.

He has asked to take me for dinner tomorrow evening (locally in the resort town we are staying in) my mum is saying go for it, but my dad seems to have reservations and is telling me not to be so stupid and naive..

This man hasn’t shown me any red flags or given me reason to distrust him.

Im kind of in the mindset that I’m here on holiday, it’s probably not going to progress.. so let’s see what happens?

has anybody else ever been in this situation, meeting a guy abroad / getting to know somebody from a different country?

I know there are huge complex loopholes and issues IF we did get to know each other more and develop a relationship - due to distance etc.

would love to know thoughts please, as I’m really in two minds.

Thank you ☺️

OP posts:
FiddlefigOnTheRoof · 29/08/2025 21:35

Seen it happen before, also with a tour guide. Passport obtained, had children - he scarpered.

Charabanc · 29/08/2025 21:35

theoneortwo · 29/08/2025 21:28

To be honest I hadn’t perceived him asking my parents their permission in negative light - I didn’t think of it that way but I do understand what you are all saying. Perhaps it’s a sign of deeper rooted control?

"Oh look at me, I am humble believable man, I just want to treat your daughter like a princess and get British citizenship"

Thingyfanding · 29/08/2025 21:33

Iamfree · 29/08/2025 21:14

He wants a British passport or a shag, or if it continues he will turn into a religious mysoginistic pig. Please let us know in the next few months

Sorry to say but I have to agree with this

LadyLolaRuben · 29/08/2025 21:33

Turkish men are notorious for this. Have dinner but thats it. Don't give him any money, a kidney or a visa.

He could be lovely. I know someone who ended up in debt and battered black and blue whilst having a 20 year relationship with a Turkish man. She saw him once per year when she flew out for two weeks to see him. Rest of time she was on phone to him day and night paying for all the calls and sending him money. Meanwhile he had married and had kids. Last visit she had with him resulted in a beating, when she didnt bring him the shopping he asked for from UK - aftershave etc. Hotel staff had to break into room to rescue her.

LlynTegid · 29/08/2025 21:32

You are this week's interest for him, I bet nothing else.

DareMe · 29/08/2025 21:32

anonymous98 · 29/08/2025 21:27

OP is only 29

Show quote history

I know. I read that myself. I’m asking how old the guy is, hence why I said ‘he’.

MsTamborineMan · 29/08/2025 21:32

If you want a flirt or a holiday fling then go for it

If your expecting this man to be the love of your life, and your going to be devastated when you find out he does this every 2 weeks then absolutely not.

TY78910 · 29/08/2025 21:32

Please watch 90 day fiancé 😂

PrissyGalore · 29/08/2025 21:32

Jeez-not every foreigner wants a British passport! I met a Greek guy on holiday over 30 years ago-we had a passionate fling, even visiting each other before it fizzled out. If you’re happy for it to be a holiday dalliance with some nice memories go for it-sometimes holiday romances do work out, but don’t do into it with that expectation. Dad is being protective, that’s all.

Queenofheart · 29/08/2025 21:30

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 29/08/2025 21:26

Have you never seen Shirley Valentine?

Or the film not without my daughter ?

LochKatrine · 29/08/2025 21:30

theoneortwo · 29/08/2025 21:28

To be honest I hadn’t perceived him asking my parents their permission in negative light - I didn’t think of it that way but I do understand what you are all saying. Perhaps it’s a sign of deeper rooted control?

It's because he thinks you can't give consent.
Anyway, no harm in a meal, have fun if you want to. Just be wary.

Digdongdoo · 29/08/2025 21:30

There's no harm on going on a date if you think you'll have fun.
But don't kid yourself that there's anything more there. It's a cliche for a reason.
Sure people meet their spouses abroad, I did. But I lived there. I wasn't 4 days into a holiday with my mum.

PiggyPigalle · 29/08/2025 21:30

ZenNudist · 29/08/2025 21:14

Happy Friday

So don't sleep with him or give him money.

They often request money when the tourist is back home. Sometimes long after.
There will be one or two genuine ones I suppose. Hope he's one of the two.

Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 29/08/2025 21:28

I think he must do this a lot. Be careful if you decide to have fun with him.

InSpainTheRain · 29/08/2025 21:28

Go! It's one night, have fun, just don't think it will last because it won't.

Queenofheart · 29/08/2025 21:28

This man hasn’t shown me any red flags or given me reason to distrust him.

considering you’ve only known him a few days it’s unlikely you will yet!

Original poster
theoneortwo · 29/08/2025 21:28

To be honest I hadn’t perceived him asking my parents their permission in negative light - I didn’t think of it that way but I do understand what you are all saying. Perhaps it’s a sign of deeper rooted control?

OP posts:
anonymous98 · 29/08/2025 21:27

DareMe · 29/08/2025 21:24

How old is he?

OP is only 29

Tagyoureit · 29/08/2025 21:27

Oh for fucks sake!! Really??

Go for dinner, have fun, be safe and then go home and forget him!

This is not your prince charming! This is not your happy ever after!

This is a chance to have a quick, fun fumble in the sun and then you leave it there, in the sun, a happy memory to look back on!!

GROW UP!!

Shayisgreat · 29/08/2025 21:27

Was it not a bit of a turn off that he asked your parents for permission to take you out?

Like you are currently a possession of your parents that he is looking to borrow for whatever reason. That's the red flag surely?

londongirl12 · 29/08/2025 21:26

Yep, I’d say listen to dad on this one. You’re not looking to sleep with him, you think he’ll just want a nice dinner and then never see you again??

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 29/08/2025 21:26

Have you never seen Shirley Valentine?

LochKatrine · 29/08/2025 21:25

A few years ago, we went on holiday to Turkey. There was a young Turkish man with a boat who would take tourists out to lovely spots to swim, quiet coves etc. The first few times he was with an English woman, they had met when she was on holiday. She was going back to Northampton and he was going to join her when she sent money.
The next time we went he had another English woman with him. You know the story. I sometimes wonder what happened with Beth in Northampton.

tinytemper66 · 29/08/2025 21:25

Listen to your dad.

Itsanewlife · 29/08/2025 21:24

I suspect if he is working on the tour, he probably has form on this and this isn't his first 'date' with someone traveling with the company. I'm surprised the tour company doesn't have a policy against this.

I really wouldn't be building any castles in the air on this one, which it seems like you are!

Also, it is a red flag to be asking your parents permission (not romantic or chivalrous as you appear to be viewing it, but paternalistic as it seems to be signalling that you cannot make these decisions for yourself)

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