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Why are my twins so much more chaotic than other toddlers

78 replies

Cokefirst · 29/08/2025 09:00

I have 17 month old twin boys, they are CHAOS.
We used to be able to go for a quick brunch and wonder around shops as a family and bring them home for naptime, but now it’s just tantrums and throwing food and screaming.

They don’t let us go out and do anything. I don’t take them to events etc because they’d be too rowdy. They babble a lot but aren’t saying more than a couple words yet so I understand they get frustrated they can’t say what they want, but it’s gone so chaotic so quickly.

I have 2 other friends with toddlers (not twins) around the same ages and they are both toddler girls, and they are so well behaved. Just an odd whinge here and there but they sit eat listen and just let their mums do their outings.

I don’t know what to do or if I’m being unreasonable in comparing my boys to those girls. I can’t even parent them properly yet as they can’t understand when to be quiet and calm down.

OP posts:
x2boys · 29/08/2025 09:08

Cokefirst · 29/08/2025 09:00

I have 17 month old twin boys, they are CHAOS.
We used to be able to go for a quick brunch and wonder around shops as a family and bring them home for naptime, but now it’s just tantrums and throwing food and screaming.

They don’t let us go out and do anything. I don’t take them to events etc because they’d be too rowdy. They babble a lot but aren’t saying more than a couple words yet so I understand they get frustrated they can’t say what they want, but it’s gone so chaotic so quickly.

I have 2 other friends with toddlers (not twins) around the same ages and they are both toddler girls, and they are so well behaved. Just an odd whinge here and there but they sit eat listen and just let their mums do their outings.

I don’t know what to do or if I’m being unreasonable in comparing my boys to those girls. I can’t even parent them properly yet as they can’t understand when to be quiet and calm down.

They are toddlers and there are two of them it won't be forever .

Btowngirl · 29/08/2025 09:06

I think girls get more difficult a bit later on than boys. Our friends have 5 year old twin boys and they’re so well behaved. They just stayed with us for a few days and my 3 year old DD’s behaviour improved as a result 😂 it’s a slog but stick with it! Set firm boundaries and in the long run I am sure they’ll end up doing great and you’ll be a bit more free.

Coffeeishot · 29/08/2025 09:06

The only twins I've encountered are extended family they are 30 now but they were wild when they were little i used to babysit to give their mum a break omg wired to the moon !

I think they probably feed off each other and it is chaos, i mean you are looking after same age babies at the same time, it will pass keep taking them out and don't compare.