Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell my husband to stop saying this?

512 replies

cittykat · 29/08/2025 07:48

my 9 year old son is a massive cat lover. He has cat slippers, tshirts, pens etc etc. I got him some cat pyjamas. These ones. https://amzn.to/45XnCwa

my husband (son’s dad) keeps telling him that he has to stop wearing them as they are girls’ pyjamas.

my son has said to him “please can you stop calling them girls’ pyjamas” and my husband says that he will be bullied if his friends see him wearing them. I have pointed out that the only one bullying him is his own father.

my husband says that telling him that they’re girls’ and not appropriate is not bullying it’s “parenting”

my husband thinks the shorts on the pyjamas are too short. Like little hot pants. Sometimes when son is lounging on the sofa they ride up and some bum cheek is visible. This angers husband and starts him off on his “girls’ pyjamas” conversation again.

son likes the pyjamas. I said I would ask on here what people thought. Please vote.

YANBU - your husband should stop calling them “girls’ pyjamas” to your son and back off

YABU - your son shouldn’t wear the pyjamas and your husband is right to protect him from future bullying if son’s friends saw the pyjamas on a sleepover.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Thread gallery
12
ItsFridayIminLoveJS · 02/09/2025 19:56

My 10 year old Grandson ( ASD) also has some pj's similar.. he has 3 cats.. ive one cat... he wrote a letter to M& S when he was 7 asking why they have a Boys section and a Girls section for clothes with signs...when anyone should have the right to wear what they like. He loved leggings and got from the " Girls" section.. he loves pink crocs and pink t shirts.
Your husband is being abusive to your son and your son will grow up with trauma... he needs educating and to grow the fuck up .

ItsFridayIminLoveJS · 02/09/2025 19:56

My 10 year old Grandson ( ASD) also has some pj's similar.. he has 3 cats.. ive one cat... he wrote a letter to M& S when he was 7 asking why they have a Boys section and a Girls section for clothes with signs...when anyone should have the right to wear what they like. He loved leggings and got from the " Girls" section.. he loves pink crocs and pink t shirts.
Your husband is being abusive to your son and your son will grow up with trauma... he needs educating and to grow the fuck up .

Emmafuller79 · 02/09/2025 19:24

SwingTheMonkey · 01/09/2025 13:51

Not she’s not my ‘matey’ and I can comment on any post I wish.

Triggered 😂

THEDEACON · 02/09/2025 08:33

ResusciAnnie · 29/08/2025 07:58

I’d get my husband to explain why he thinks a girl wearing tiny bum-showing shorts would be ok, if it’s not ok for his son? 😵‍💫

This!

SwingTheMonkey · 01/09/2025 13:51

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 13:20

Is she your matey ? Other wise why you jumping in on the post? 🙄

Not she’s not my ‘matey’ and I can comment on any post I wish.

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 13:20

SwingTheMonkey · 01/09/2025 12:59

I think it might just be you who is struggling to understand what @CellophaneFlower is saying.

Is she your matey ? Other wise why you jumping in on the post? 🙄

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 13:19

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 13:13

That's one sentence actually. Here's another one that might just possibly be in language you might understand: i fink your rong.

ive got my Pringles, wine, pear drops and settled on me sofa… please keep your comedy comment’s coming. There getting worser 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 13:13

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 12:45

how long did it take you to come out with three sentences and still make no sense? You can come up with 100 sentences if you like and still make no sense. 😂😂😂

That's one sentence actually. Here's another one that might just possibly be in language you might understand: i fink your rong.

SwingTheMonkey · 01/09/2025 12:59

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 12:45

how long did it take you to come out with three sentences and still make no sense? You can come up with 100 sentences if you like and still make no sense. 😂😂😂

I think it might just be you who is struggling to understand what @CellophaneFlower is saying.

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 12:45

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 12:15

I thought it may be a struggle for you to comprehend proper English, so this doesn't surprise me in the least!

how long did it take you to come out with three sentences and still make no sense? You can come up with 100 sentences if you like and still make no sense. 😂😂😂

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 12:15

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 09:46

You make no sense at all 😂

I thought it may be a struggle for you to comprehend proper English, so this doesn't surprise me in the least!

Roseshavethorns · 01/09/2025 09:56

The issue, for me, wouldn't be that they were girls or boys but that they don't fit properly. They are obviously just too short. That may be because they are cut for girls or just oddly made.
I would buy plain pj bottoms or shorts that fit and your ds can wear the cat top with them

Emmafuller79 · 01/09/2025 09:46

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 07:28

Correct. So you've actually just put paid to your own argument 👏

Some kids are bigger than others regardless of sex, therefore no matter if PJs are labelled girls or boys, it depends on the size of the actual child whether they fit, not whether they have a set of balls between their legs.

You make no sense at all 😂

CellophaneFlower · 01/09/2025 07:28

Emmafuller79 · 31/08/2025 02:43

Don’t know what kids you know😂

at 9 boys and girls are very different to each
other and even in there own gender group . Some girls and boys look there age / younger

whilst some girls are wearing bras and look about 13 and some boys are very tall and look like 13 also.

i work in a school 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Correct. So you've actually just put paid to your own argument 👏

Some kids are bigger than others regardless of sex, therefore no matter if PJs are labelled girls or boys, it depends on the size of the actual child whether they fit, not whether they have a set of balls between their legs.

Funnywonder · 31/08/2025 11:53

Dundonia · 31/08/2025 11:52

If she was a teacher she would definitely have told you.

Fair point!

RapunzelHadExtensions · 31/08/2025 11:53

Funnywonder · 31/08/2025 11:47

You work in a SCHOOL? Why didn’t you say? You must be an expert. Have another dozen thumbs ups from me. And maybe an eye roll or two.

I hope you’re not a teacher in said school. Sentences generally begin with a capital letter and end with a full stop. And it’s ‘their’ in that context, not ‘there’. Oh dear, 2 out of 10 for effort. Must try harder.

If the poster was a teacher or TA I'm sure they'd have said that instead of 'working in a school' which could be any number of other roles, thankfully 😂

Dundonia · 31/08/2025 11:52

Funnywonder · 31/08/2025 11:47

You work in a SCHOOL? Why didn’t you say? You must be an expert. Have another dozen thumbs ups from me. And maybe an eye roll or two.

I hope you’re not a teacher in said school. Sentences generally begin with a capital letter and end with a full stop. And it’s ‘their’ in that context, not ‘there’. Oh dear, 2 out of 10 for effort. Must try harder.

If she was a teacher she would definitely have told you.

RapunzelHadExtensions · 31/08/2025 11:51

Voted YABU by accident but you're definitely not!

Funnywonder · 31/08/2025 11:47

Emmafuller79 · 31/08/2025 02:43

Don’t know what kids you know😂

at 9 boys and girls are very different to each
other and even in there own gender group . Some girls and boys look there age / younger

whilst some girls are wearing bras and look about 13 and some boys are very tall and look like 13 also.

i work in a school 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

You work in a SCHOOL? Why didn’t you say? You must be an expert. Have another dozen thumbs ups from me. And maybe an eye roll or two.

I hope you’re not a teacher in said school. Sentences generally begin with a capital letter and end with a full stop. And it’s ‘their’ in that context, not ‘there’. Oh dear, 2 out of 10 for effort. Must try harder.

Emmafuller79 · 31/08/2025 07:59

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 31/08/2025 07:14

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

i agree you are👍

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 31/08/2025 07:14

Emmafuller79 · 31/08/2025 02:43

Don’t know what kids you know😂

at 9 boys and girls are very different to each
other and even in there own gender group . Some girls and boys look there age / younger

whilst some girls are wearing bras and look about 13 and some boys are very tall and look like 13 also.

i work in a school 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

eish · 31/08/2025 07:14

My son tends to wear random t shirts and tracksuit bottom shorts or checked pyjama bottoms to bed. Keep the t shirt and buy some more wintery bottoms now it’s getting colder.

NuovaPilbeam · 31/08/2025 06:48

Boys shorts sometimes have a slightly deeper gusset than girls (for obvious reasons.... they've got more bulky external genitalia to be accommodated.

The only reason i can think of that these would be problematic is if they didn't fit in that area, so were bulging or something hanging out etc but it doesn't sound like its the case

Op i don't think its an issue but fyi, m&s has boys pjs with a funny surfing cat on (they are advertised on this thread!).

Emmafuller79 · 31/08/2025 02:43

Funnywonder · 30/08/2025 10:19

We’re talking about a NINE year old child here. Last time I looked, boys and girls are pretty much straight up and down at this age.

I don’t need to Google ta very much. Perhaps you do … 👍

Don’t know what kids you know😂

at 9 boys and girls are very different to each
other and even in there own gender group . Some girls and boys look there age / younger

whilst some girls are wearing bras and look about 13 and some boys are very tall and look like 13 also.

i work in a school 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

NewPlumSloth · 30/08/2025 22:10

Son’s dad is not being helpful and may give son a complex. Does this attitude go further than just the pyjamas? If your son chooses a “girly” game or a “soft” creative endeavour (art, music, languages) is that also an issue? I’d be interested to know if it goes deeper than the choice of nightwear.

If it is just about the PJs then if your son likes the pyjamas it is irrelevant whether the marketing is for girls or boys. It isn’t like he is walking around at school or at sleepovers in just a cat thong! That would not be ok for either a boy or a girl.