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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To turn down job interview

34 replies

ChangingWeight · 29/08/2025 03:42

I had a chat with a recruiter. She had access to my CV (no embellishment) and I explained I was wanting to leave my public sector role for a more technical role within private sector, and that I maybe wanted to take a step down in my career in terms of not being a senior manager of data professionals, but perhaps being a data expert without managing for the time being then working my way up. I said I was rusty with certain software as a result of being a manager but wanted I get back into being more technical.

Anyway within 30 minutes she immediately secured me a senior data scientist job interview. She said I’m a perfect fit for a job and that she spoke to the job holder and they can’t wait to interview me etc. At this point, she drops in that they want the job holder to be an expert in certain software that I specifically said I was rusty in. She asked me to brush up on my skills ahead of the interview next week and that there will be a technical test.

AIBU to not go to this interview? I just feel like my technical skills aren’t there yet, and I don’t understand why she put me forward given I said I wanted to work my way up towards a senior position again to allow me to build my confidence being more technical. The job otherwise seems good and the company seems fine and the pay is same/higher than my current job. But the technical test seems tough, I don’t want to embarrass myself or waste their time.

OP posts:
Thethingswedoforlove · 29/08/2025 10:42

Surely it’s worth a go? What have you got to lose ?

Thepeopleversuswork · 29/08/2025 10:42

If you actually want the job, I wouldn't let that put you off. Companies rarely find someone who ticks every box and usually have to compromise. I would talk up other aspects of what you do and emphasise that while you have some experience, it's limited and out of date so you're not misleading them.

As a PP mentioned, women tend to think they have to hit absolutely every metric to be worthy of getting a job, men don't let this stand in their way.

Original poster
ChangingWeight · 29/08/2025 10:39

sorry just realised my approach above sounds really negative! Didn’t mean for it to come across so defeatist.

I don’t think SQL is hard to get to grips with, I just don’t currently use it at work and haven’t really used it since university. I could try to memorise a bunch of stuff ahead of the interview, but I don’t know if that’s fair on me or the employer. Ideally I’d rather have a more junior role to hone my ability, before having a senior role interview. I do have coding, programming and stats software experience so I’m sure I would be able to learn and use SQL well…just not in the space of 3 days!

OP posts:
Original poster
ChangingWeight · 29/08/2025 10:37

so the technical test is on SQL. But I have no idea whether I share my screen with them, they share their screen with me, or I’m just supposed to speak the answers out loud and describe how I would approach something.

i have some knowledge of SQL but not enough to be listing all the steps to approach things off the top of my head. I did see loads of YouTube videos on prospective interview questions but I’m not going to remember all those steps in time.

I’m employed but wanting to leave my role asap.

OP posts:
Canthelpmyselffromjoiningin · 29/08/2025 10:12

If you're job hunting anyway, do the interview. There's no pressure as you don't expect / want the job so its good practice for when your desired job comes up

Silverbirchleaf · 29/08/2025 09:03

You’re under no obligation to go. Don’t forget, recruiters get a commission on every successful placement, so it’s in their interest for you to go.

Swiftie1878 · 29/08/2025 08:52

YANBU, but you may be underselling yourself. As long as your cv is honest, and you tell the truth about rustiness at the interview, you could still go for it.
If you are offered the job, you can also choose to turn it down if it feels too senior for what you want right now.
It’s really up to you! Stay true to yourself, but perhaps explore the opportunity? If they like you, there may even be a less senior role they’d consider you for!

CatsAreCool222 · 29/08/2025 08:46

Is the software something you could brush up on? Women often feel they need to be a 100% match for a job advert whereas as men are happy with 50%.

RoseAlone · 29/08/2025 04:08

That's what they're paid to do. They go through LinkedIn and anyone who looks vaguely relevant, gets a call and flattered and schmoozed into accepting an interview which in reality is usually just an initial screening call.
My son has recruiters like this on at least 3 or 4 times a week due to the industry he's in which is similar to yours. They're all unsolicited calls and follow exactly the same script that you've been given.
He had one a couple of weeks ago, the same thing, the company were very keen to speak to him blah blah blah. He said he wasn't a good fit because what they were looking for, he hadn't done in several years. He was assured he was just what they wanted. He knew it was a load of nonsense but given the salary was well into 6 figures he decided to play the game. Sure enough the company was looking for someone with up to date skills in the area he hadn't worked in for years.

Calls like this are the modern day equivalent of cold calls trying to sell double glazing or solar panels 😄

It's up to you if you take the call or not but just be aware that this is a script they follow and they get paid for people they persuade to go for the initial screening call so you'd definitely not be unreasonable to turn it down if you don't think it's a good fit for you.

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