I don’t know if I ever did.
He came along when I was lonely, feeling desperate that I would never get married, have children like my friends.
We were friends first and he was kind, caring and generous. He’s always had a good body and is a very fit and active person. He’s also very well ‘equipped’ if you get my meaning! 😂
But facially (I feel awful saying it) I just think he’s unattractive.
We had sexual chemistry when we first met and rushed into a relationship.
Our sex is still very good, but I have to keep the lights off - which I feel terrible about saying.
My Exes were good looking, two in particular were very easy on the eye and I’d fund myself staring regularly, getting butterflies etc.
I've been told I’m attractive, I had/still have lots of male attention. But for some reason I’ve always had really low self esteem and low self confidence. When I was with my exceptionally attractive ex partners, I never felt good enough and always thought they’d wake up one day and wonder what they were doing with me.
Which is sort of what happened with one but the other was an entirely different story.
I just don’t know what to do. I would feel so ridiculous to end a marriage because of this. He is a fantastic dad to our son and he supports me in everything I want to do. He’s very honest and reliable.