To think most people on here are slightly unhinged?

I guess that's human nature, wanting to write it down & discuss it and seek validation - and indeed why we discuss many things with our friends and family. And why forums exist!

Completely agree OP.

If the OP has written anything that could even slightly encourage some criticism about the situation or their behaviour (particularly when asking advice about something far more pressing), many catty people come out of the woodwork.

I've seen some really upsetting examples where there's clearly somebody very upset reaching out for advice, and there's still been an absolute pile on.

Many people out there looking to twist the knife or completely devoid of empathy.

Blaming or ridiculing the OP is everywhere on social media not just MN. I live in a small market town that seems to be full of nice people IRL but if someone posts a complaint about the bins on the town FB group there will always be PPs saying 1) maybe the bin man was having a bad day you are being mean 2) why didn’t you clear it up the 3) get a life loser 4) immigrants are to blame.

What I find fascinating is not just the answers people give, but the questions that are asked. Usually it's quite obvious what the person needs to do (so I assume they are just seeking sympathy?) or are saying what they have done (so want everyone to pay them on the back and say how wonderful they are?). The desperate need for validation and lack of confidence is astounding.

Another person trying to show how they nice they are by being patronising and using misogynistic language.

As I said, every thread is a one side story, so most people will take an OP at face value. What's the point of posting if you don't believe the OP?

Aldo is it only AIBU? Or the whole site? I’ll admit I only read AIBU as they are always trending, don’t go looking for threads but just read what’s on trending

@Sadworld I mostly visit AIBU, but there are other parts of Mumsnet I visit often which are nowhere near as combative and often are people genuinely trying to help.

I like the Food and recipes board. Also the Holidays and UK Holidays.

Oh and from about October onwards the Christmas forum. Don't visit there if you are a Grinch as it is a haven for people who love prepping for Christmas.

Edited to include Crafts and Books. Oh and 10+ years ago when DD was about to go to Uni the Higher Education threads made interesting reading. I remember a thread where someone asked what their DC should take to Uni for the first time that became hilarious reading.

You can report posts but they don't get deleted very often. Same as Twitter/X.

You said I posted about people not being nice but you don't seem to want to give any specifics?

Erm, you can report posts on Facebook. I know people who have been banned from Facebook.

What on earth are you talking about? Sadworld didn't start a thread on Facebook so how could I have posted on there.

I think you are on a one woman crusade to defend not very nice people.

You don't think it's Facebok's responsibility to delete racist and misogynistic comments? And you don't realise that the ultimate decision on that comes from Zuckerburg?

In the olden days -maybe 2008 _ many fewer posters so an interesting thread could have 5 contributions one day, none the next then some more with the OP and posters having time to think, change their minds, whatever.

Now there are thousands of posters- some not genuine, some misogynists, some men, some teens.

All in all for the number of posters the advice and support is good.
But I have no probs ignoring idiots.

I'm not protective over MN, just pointing out that Facebook is a hive of racism and misogyny. Which is presumably why you're commenting here and not FB.

Are you saying I called out people for not being nice on the Italy accident thread and for overtaking disabled people? What's wrong with that?

Ridiculous post.

This post doesn't even make sense. It was women posting in the comments. Zuckerburg doesn't control what everyone writes on Facebook. I've had a school Mum having a go at me on Facebook and I'm pretty confident she doesn't know Zuckerburg.

@EasternEcho I saw it too and thought the same thing!

I love the Very British Problems Instagram page.

People are pack animals. If one person says something negative, it often snowballs into plain nastiness and they then try and outdo each other in their condemnation.

YANBU OP. I recently saw the followng posted elsewhere, and I instantly thought of MN, and the way many threads usually go.

OP: “I’m going to eat an X biscuit from X supermarket”
—-
The replies:

“But I don’t like biscuits! ”
“You shouldn’t eat that type of biscuit, you should eat this type of biscuit instead”
“Biscuits are bad for you”
"I don't believe you actually have a biscuit"
“Allow me to educate you about biscuits. You probably don’t know this but…”
“You should make your own biscuits instead”
“I just had some vegetables from my vegetable garden, much better than biscuits!”
“I’m better than you at eating biscuits”
“Fake!”
“Wrong!”
“I actually did my PHD on biscuits so I’m more qualified than you to talk about biscuits”
“Alright for some!!! Some of us can’t afford biscuits!!!”
“Why is this important?”
“That’s not how you spell biskuits”
“My great grandmother actually invented biscuits”
“No, sorry, I do not want diabetes thank you very much. Do you have diabetes? I bet you have diabetes.”
“How are you not dead?”
"How old are you?/I hope you don't have kids."
“Unfollowed”
“Where can I buy biscuits please?” (It’s written in the post, and the answer is “all supermarkets”)
“What are these biscuits called?” <it’s also written in the post>
“Processed rubbish!!!!! ”
“Do you mean cookies?”
“I’m not reading all that”
“I haven’t eaten biscuits since I saw a YouTube video about biscuits and saw they’re made with horse poo”
“I haven’t eaten a biscuit since being diagnosed with gout in 1972”
“Recipe please”
“That’s not a biscuit, it’s a cake, there was a famous court case that said…”
“I know this is meant to be a lighthearted post about biscuits, but I’m going to talk about something incredibly serious and off-topic instead…”
“So?”
“I find this post offensive”
“Why?”
“No banana for scale?”
“Where is the plate from please?”
“You need to get out more / You must lead a very sheltered life”
“Biscuits were better in my day”
“Oh I love biscuits! Great post! Thank you! Love your post!”

Yes I fully agree 💚

Why are you are so protective over Mumsnet, its just a forum.

This is the third thread that I've seen you on about people not being nice. Italy accident and overtaking disabled people being the other two.

I didnt know Zuckerburg was misogynistic🙄

You need a few lessons in comprehension love. Nowhere do I say that I chose to believe the stories about men and MILs, simply that there is usually a 100% acceptance of such stories because they suit a narrative.

Yes!!

I have often noticed this too.

I was going to post along these lines but thought I would read the full thread first. Glad I did because I think you have expressed this much better and more authoritatively than I would.

Clearly though this isn't just Mumsnet. I read something recently on a local social media page where someone was having a rant about bad behaviour by some young people in the town centre and had some footage from the incident to back it up. The early posters were outraged and calling the youngsters involved scum etc. I don't usually post on there but did this time make the mistake of pointing out how this incident might easily have developed from an innocent mistake. Pretty soon there was a pile on where apparently I am the reason society is in the mess it is in. Who knew!

Of course people are nastier behind a screen. There's an entire thread right now about things you hate but can't say, it's the same sort of premise.

I have so many annoyances with my MIL which I'd never be so rude to share directly to her, but if someone posting on here appeared to share the same traits as her, I'd tell them how I feel.

There's little to no consequence to what anyone says here, so your normal moral standards go out the window. It's also not reality when it's just words on screen. It is to the person posting the thread (or sometimes maybe not) but that's so very different to having a human being sitting in front of you.

I think there a lot of rose coloured glasses about the 'old days'.

It has always been a viper pit. People maybe be dumber now because there are more of them. But MN was always pretty mental.

Calling women bitches to show how kind you are?