To be upset and embarrassed by the consultant's secretary?

Definitely complain as others have said so she can improve. Some hospitals are really good, I’ve been lucky but the others need to improve.

There's some info on PALS and how to make a complaint here;

What is PALS (Patient Advice and Liaison Service)?
www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/hospitals/what-is-pals-patient-advice-and-liaison-service/

Yes, absolutely send it by email - if you phone, not only could it be forgotten/ignored/not acted on', there's always the chance you get somebody who doesn't put the handset near their mouth, is in a busy area with lots of background noise or, worst of all, answers calls on handsfree.

I'd complain to pals and I have before about patronising behavior to my disabled child. The first eye roller got a "look, he doesn't understand you. You can raise your voice as much as you like but it's not going to make any difference. He's disabled, not thick"

tbh when this happens repeatedly and I get a tut and eye roll I'm going to repay the favour of humiliation. Fuck it. sometimes they snap and tut and im only human too. Life is hard enough with a disability without this shit.

When I got past this gatekeeper I had the entire same thing with the nurse wjust he just would not accept that we was wasn't just both thick as shit and making things up. So I complained and it did make a difference. That nurse won't do what he did again in a hurry. He totally dismissed us, didn't belive me therefore didnt examine my son and completely missed a very visible and obvious injury.

I am sorry. She is in the wrong job but you cannot do much about that. I hope you have better experiences in future, not all med secs are like her (I'm a retired one).

As for a copy of the letter that will be sent to your GP. That will give all the details you need to know.

I feel sad on your behalf - which doesn't help you of course. People are often not properly trained for jobs and this is the result.

My husband is a hospital consultant and funnily enough I am deaf and wear a hearing aid too . Complain, she probably has this ignorant attitude with other patients.

Please complain. Totally unacceptable behaviour and a breach of confidentiality.

I’m sorry this happened to you. I hope you feel better soon x

I really think you need to submit a written complaint to the hospital complaints department. I would not contact her directly about this.

What a horrible, humiliating experience op! I felt quite choked up just reading that, so please, please follow through with the complaint.

Another one sending a big hug.

I also wear hearing aids & have another more visible disability and often have to remind people to come closer / face me if they want me to understand so I really feel for you @wuminzo @GravyBoatWars had a good suggestion for the complaint letter; I’d also add that under the Equality Act they should make reasonable adjustments to ensure that disabled people aren’t discriminated against, and the set up of that area sounds as if it does discriminate against members of the Deaf community. That might add weight to your letter.

Sending you a big hug.

I would raise this as a patient confidentiality issue as well as poor practice. I’m sorry this happened to you OP. It’s unacceptable

Yes that definitely is worthy of a complaint in writing. How rude that is awful behaviour.

I’m sorry you went through this. As a fellow hearing aid user I do know how difficult some situations can be.
I second the suggestions of asking about hospital policy on communicating with hearing-impaired people; Do they give any training? And also about contacting PALS. You do not necessarily need to name the person involved; Just say you have found the assistance unsatisfactory.
Also, hearing-impaired or not, surely it is best to give important information in writing as well as verbally (although maybe they will follow up a letter).
I hope you get results; The more of us who raise these issues the better!

I've had really understanding, sensible people in that situation and some who I think are actually dedicated to practising ventriloquism.

It's probably about time for the hospital staff to have their EDI training updated to include something about disabilities.

I'd definitely submit a written complaint about the lack of training for staff who are dealing with those who are d/Deaf and hard of hearing, using that experience as the example.

I think your suggested approach to it is good.

If you are likely to have to see her again, not making it personal but seeking clarification is good. Ask how they can ensure patients with hearing impairments receive information in an appropriate way.

As a PP said, jot down what you want to say and cut and paste it into chat GPT with an instruction to make it neutral.

In some ways these policy orientated questions are harder to ignore than the 'she treated me this way '.

Although others were listening I don't think the embarrassment is all yours (though understand it felt that way). I'm sure most of them thought her idiotic when you'd clearly spelled out the problem.

You could have missed/misunderstood key information because this woman couldn't be bothered to make reasonable adjustment for you. It is not acceptable. Please complain formally, not just for you but for all the other hearing impaired people who can’t advocate for themselves.

That's terrible, my MIL was profoundly deaf and everyone knew to make sure she could see you if speaking to her. The secretary should have had the common sense and decency to follow your wishes. Awful, and I'm sure everyone was thinking that.

@wuminzo I really felt for you when I read this.

I'm hearing impaired and know how infuriating/embarrassing/ annoying these situations can be. But people who behave like this need to be told, so they can get training on how to deal with people with this type of disability. So complain, and ask what training medical secretaries get on dealing with patients with this type of issue.

The secretary should be the one who feels embarrassed (and ashamed), not you. There is absolutely no excuse for her behaviour. I would write to the consultant and complain, and the Hospital/Trust, suggesting further training on how to effectively communicate with and help all patients is necessary.

And don't for a minute think that anyone in that waiting room thought less of you - I am sure they were all thinking that she was a total dick. (Sadly, I am not surprised no one stood up and corrected her on your behalf, but I would have, had I been there.)

Write a factual letter, what happened and the interactions with the staff
You absolutely should not have been treated so shoddily
This will not be the hospital policy and if the trust is told of episodes that are inadequate they can address it

Complain - but not directly to her
Its a process and inclusivity issue that requires training and explicit guidance how to sensitively work with hearing impaired people
sorry you were treated so poorly

Yes, I think you should write in at least informally.

As someone with an often-invisible disability (though I now use an assistance dog, which increases visibility in one way but adds different issues) my suggestion for a complaint or letter would be to focus on the accessibility and privacy issues and less on your feelings. I don't say that because your feelings are unimportant, but in general a complaint about someone "embarrassing you" is more likely to result in platitudes and an apology while giving them more objective feedback creates something obviously actionable and flags this as something practices are required to address.

I would explain how the receptionist's actions impaired your ability to access consultant services (you were struggling to get needed information and to be sure your own questions and statements were understood, you were increasingly concerned about privacy and that became a distraction) and some specific examples of things she could have done to assist (moving closer, ensuring her face was easily visible, pausing to listen closely to you, etc.) and things the practice can do, like having a space available for these conversations to take place in private with better acoustics and proximity. You don't have to leave all mention of emotions out but I wouldn't lead with it or focus on it.

If I had been there I would have been looking at her thinking what a bitch. I certainly wouldn’t have been looking at you thinking you were stupid.

Definitely complain. She needs spoken to at least but definitely training.

I’m so sorry this happened to you, it’s absolutely unacceptable and you should complain (if you feel up to it.)

For what it’s worth, if I’d overheard this then I’d have said something.