Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Things that PISS you off, but you can't really say so.

637 replies

pinknailvarnish1 · 26/08/2025 17:12

I have a few. Can't say them out loud (except to DH).

MIL & FIL - multi millionaires. Spend loads of money on themselves, lavish holidays, sports cars, only the very best restaurants etc. Never ever do they give a penny to their adult children (and one is flat broke). This is despite them both having been given property and a thriving business by a parent themselves.

My Dad - Overbearing, alcoholic, violent outbursts etc, all through our childhood. He's now decrepit and I have to do so much for him. I resent it.

Brother - keeps saying he's broke, whilst living like a rockstar. Just spend £20k on a holiday, lives in a £600k house, drives top of the range car, but often claims poverty - stop lying!

And breathe......

Anyone else?

OP posts:
Manzana · 26/08/2025 21:52

reading the ones about yoghurt pot scrapers, my partner tiddles with certain food dishes, such as risotto or savoury rice. I don't think he realises but every fork full is preceded by moving bits around several times before he's satisfied with the combination of food on his fork, it irritates me so much, but feel mean to say anything, so I either seethe or eat separately.

LGBirmingham · 26/08/2025 21:51

People using 'ect.' instead of the correct abbreviation of 'etc.' when they want to say 'et cetera'. It's rife on here and people will use the wrong one multiple times in the same post so it must be intentional.

I'm not going to be that person who deliberately points it out, but it annoys me.

BollickyBill · 26/08/2025 21:50

Inlaws signed house over to their daughter. She is one of 3 siblings. There was no family discussion between siblings and parents. 2 brothers were given £20k each. House worth in excess of £550k. No mortgage as inlaws had cleared it. Kitchen was extended to accommodate 4 adults 3 kids. Loan out through her hubby's company. Lian was £30k. Theyalso owned their own house about 80 miles away from parents. Sold that and made a profit of £260k.
Am livid that the boys were dismissed in the way they were. Don't give a crap about the money as everything we gave we did ourselves but I just feel the boys weren't even considered.

Missingducks · 26/08/2025 21:49

People who say they will look after your dog whilst you work away for 10 days. I had planned a trusted petsitter booking which offended them, and now they can't do it for one of those days. My dog is an elderly rescue and can't go to boarding kennels as she made herself very ill with stress last time.

shuggles · 26/08/2025 21:48

@Thehop even if you're gorgeous we don't need to see anyone's arse. It's gross.

Disagree, some people clearly have a nice arse.

Thehop · 26/08/2025 21:47

People wearing thongs to swim in. I've seen it round pools at family resorts and even in UK leisure centres

even if you're gorgeous we don't need to see anyone's arse. It's gross.

JudgeJ · 26/08/2025 21:45

taxguru · 26/08/2025 20:08

Older people who are sat on levels of savings/wealth purely by sheer luck of the year they were born, who genuinely believe they "earned" it through sheer hard work and making "good" choices, and that all today's younger adults are work shy, lazy and can't buy a house because they have an Iphone and a Netflix subscription! The same elderly people claiming they live in poverty whilst apparently forgetting the half million pound house they live in and a few hundred thousand tucked away in ISAs!

I would include younger people who like to blame oldies for all the ills of the world. Lazy, ill-informed thinking based often on a very small sample usually.

VielleTruite · 26/08/2025 21:43

Those twatty cars with young male wank stains at the wheel, whose exhausts are designed to pop/bang/roar at ear splitting levels. Blowing a loud exhaust used to be an offence. Like most other daily aggravations, the 'authorities' couldn't give a shiny shite. Every time I hear one, I want the driver hunted down, the car burned to ashes in front of him and his licence revoked forever.

My nine-year old granddaughter's appalling manners and my son's total lack of interest in doing anything about them. She's my only grandchild and my son's only child and we all love her. However, he's got the classic guilt going on because he split from her mother several years ago, so he spoils her by way of some kind of 'compensation'. She doesn't need 'compensating'. She's had the best of everything since the day she was born, she has two co-parents who are on cordial terms. She just has to open her mouth to say, 'I want' and he makes sure it's there. It infuriates me when we go to family meals and he won't tell her to get her face out of her tablet and speak to the assembled company. 'Please' and 'thank you' got out way down the road.

My lovely partner's completely over the top driving manners. We have to have a running commentary. "Oh dear! Maybe I should have let that chap go. He wasn't indicating, though". This will go on for a mile. Meanwhile he's not looking at the road and not paying attention to where we're supposed to be going until I remind him. Majorly thanking, flashing and waving to someone who has just let him in on a filter lane. It drives me insane. I feel like saying, "Why don't you just pull over and offer the bloke a nosh and really make his bastard day?" Fuck's sake! JUST DRIVE!

Thanks for that.

travelallthetime · 26/08/2025 21:43

I am unreasonable but my neighbour parks outside my house every night despite having an empty drive.
I know it’s a private road and anyone can park there but it makes it awkward (but not impossible) to get off my drive and it beyond pisses me off

shuggles · 26/08/2025 21:42

somethingnewandexciting · 26/08/2025 21:09

Thanks for taking the time to reply!
I think with pensions you can't touch them until 58 or something - the point of having the savings is so that we can function in a disaster without missing a beat. I've had a traumatic life and can't not have some back up nearby or my anxiety becomes a huge issue (all ironically part of why I can't get a higher paid job annoyingly!). So I'm stuck on just above minimum wage but, savings! I at least feel proud of me for having them, even if the govt think I'm not poor enough!

Show quote history

All understandable, but just a few points:

  • The majority of people don't save enough money into their pensions, so although you can't touch them until late 50s or retirement, any money put into your pension is money put in a good place.
  • Is it still possible to have a rainy day fund that's smaller than £30k and allows you to receive child benefits? I don't know the threshold, but something to look into maybe.
sharond101 · 26/08/2025 21:41

I have several, I am super sensitive to things so with no names,

  • slurping cereal or spaghetti,
  • refusing to use a knife to eat,
  • walking around whilst brushing teeth making a squiching noise like swirling saliva,
  • singing a song you only know one line of so this gets repeated over and over
  • people calling me pal, I am a grown woman and probably not their pal
  • people copying me and claiming it's their idea
  • not reponding to messages for days on end then apoogising for not responding, literally every time
  • doing the dishes and not putting them away
  • drying your hands with your hair
  • inside out or scrunched up socks in the wash
  • changing the toilet roll but leaving the carboard inner part in the toilet

I could go on forever....

Bumbaglina · 26/08/2025 21:41

People who stop me in the street to tell me they/their mum/granny/cat used to have ginger hair. I always want to do that Alan Partridge hands in the air so-what face. Extra points to the old lady who went into her purse to get a photo out to prove it, it was a black and white photo.

PersephoneSmith · 26/08/2025 21:38

Crole · 26/08/2025 18:20

I've been keeping a list of these for a while. I swear I'm not uptight. Buckle up, it's a long list.

  • specific requests for low value small ads items instead of just giving it away for free or asking for a euro, magnum mini ice creams, haribo, specific brands of coffee
  • people who bring children to saunas, even if they're quiet.
  • mumblers
  • knitted cardigans that look like jackets worn by muscle men, especially if they're polyester
  • people who make obvious suggestions about how to identify murder victims from Interpol posts, as if the police hadn't thought of doing that already, "check the serial number", "check the dental records".
  • people gifting voucher gifts like 1x Babysitting or 1x romantic cooked meal. What a lame idea.
  • Christmas dinner flavoured sandwiches/anything. Christmas panini, straight in the bin.
  • People who wear matching Christmas pyjamas.
  • people don't wash their clothes or bedding before using it.
  • people who say "you'll be speaking to my lawyer" about minor inconveniences. You know they don't have a lawyer and aren't intimidating anyone.
  • people who offer dodgy financial courses directed towards multiple audiences at once, advice like "stop living paycheck to paycheck" and then "buy rental property". Huh?
  • people who comment on social media about AI destroying the planet and then have photos of either meat or their short and long haul trips on their profile, or both.
  • old people who complain about the behaviour of "kids nowadays". We're one generation away from beating kids into submission at school and home, it might take time to adjust.
  • people who say they "dont watch TV" to sound superior but stream for hours. No one watches TV like its the 90s, you're better than no-one.
  • people who have feather pillows on their sofa with the feathers poking out and stabbing you in the arm. Get new ones or stop inviting me to your house.
  • people who sins"price point" instead of price.
  • people who post chatgpt answers to questions on social media, like they're doing a public service
  • people who comment on recipes and and about the weirdest substitutes, courgettes for sugar? NO, obviously not Janet.
  • people who say "picky bits" for food
  • people who suggest donating book hoards to local libraries, no one wants ancient dusty moldy books.
  • people who dont have a simple prepared answer to "what do you do?" and explain that it's complicated. I dont care what you do Marcus, it's small talk.
Edited
Show quote history

There comes a point where the issues say much more about you than the people you are moaning about…

SometimesUnsure · 26/08/2025 21:38

Football. Its constant and there are so many matches across so many competitions. Games, podcasts, adverts, all some people want to talk about etc... Also the rolling around, the moaning at the ref etc. The game itself isn't too bad its all the extra stuff that pisses me off. Just play the game and enjoy it 🤷‍♀️
I enjoy watching sports in general but I'm already fed up of being surrounded by it 🙈

Kevinbaconsrealwife · 26/08/2025 21:37

Phoebesparrow · 26/08/2025 18:14

I have a (ex) friend who cannot let things go

I met her at work and we became friends outside of work too

She pleads poverty all the bloody time but will find money for wants but can't afford needs-endless texts moaning about how skint she is,can't even afford dog food or a pint of milk,but wanted a kitten so bought one and will buy crap on temu

But the worst one is she rants on about things from years ago

Ill be minding my own business when I get a message from her,ranting on about her ex (who left her for another woman) 11 years ago

Shes had no contact with him (or her) but I am forced to go over and over it all again and and again (and how she broke another exs nose for no real reason apart from she felt like it,ive never met this guy but i feel i know everything about him)

She shagged a bloke after she broke up with him and from what I can gather,this bloke treated her like a princess but she got the ick and ghosted him

Cue hours,days,weeks,years of going over and over it again and again (the ick seems to have come about because she stayed over at his and he bought her some shampoo and a toothbrush-again,shes picked over this endlessly and by doing that,hes abusive)

Shes shagging another bloke who is messing her about and paying her for sex

Again,endless hours of going over every single tiny detail (he said,she said) and then I see them hand in hand walking down the street the next day,looking all loved up

Hours later,I get the messages again (rinse and repeat)

It's awful but I told her I don't really care anymore,I'm out of energy and have distanced myself from her as I can't keep going over every single thing over and over and she refuses to listen to advice,she just wants to moan but its all the same shit)

I'm a terrible person but I can't keep doing this

You are so NOT a terrible person…..she sounds an absolute self indulgent , mahoosive pain in your arse ! Xx

Thisisbetweenyoumeandtheinternet · 26/08/2025 21:37

My DH turns the front door lock up when he comes in meaning I can’t open it even with my key and have to ring the bell. I literally glare at him every time and ask him to stop doing it but he doesn’t!

People who literally talk about themselves and have an inability to ask questions back about you.

When someone phones me for something they can text about.. fuck off I don’t want to answer my phone! (I don’t so they have to text!)

Having to make small talk twice a day on the school run.. eurgh no thank you I just want to ignore you all!

Thisisbetweenyoumeandtheinternet · 26/08/2025 21:37

My DH turns the front door lock up when he comes in meaning I can’t open it even with my key and have to ring the bell. I literally glare at him every time and ask him to stop doing it but he doesn’t!

People who literally talk about themselves and have an inability to ask questions back about you.

When someone phones me for something they can text about.. fuck off I don’t want to answer my phone! (I don’t so they have to text!)

Having to make small talk twice a day on the school run.. eurgh no thank you I just want to ignore you all!

JudgeJ · 26/08/2025 21:36

Assssofspades · 26/08/2025 19:54

My friends are the same, when I offer options 'I don't mind, whatever', but then when I choose, 'oh, hmmm, maybe not there though'. 😑

Maybe they don't want to meet up 😂

Show quote history

If I asked my late OH what he'd like to have for dinner he usually replied 'I'm easy' to which I would reply 'Yes, I know you are but what do you want for dinner?'

abracadabra1980 · 26/08/2025 21:35

Having to be in my DM's presence, for more than about an hour. Probably, sad, but true.

ChelseaDetective · 26/08/2025 21:33

MarryMeTomHardy · 26/08/2025 19:03

You need to cook it on a slice of bread - then if it leaks you get a bonus slice of garlic bread!

Show quote history

I haven’t bought Chicken Kiev in decades. I just added it to my online shop so I could cook it on a piece of bread. Genius.

Phoebesparrow · 26/08/2025 21:32

Pushmepullu · 26/08/2025 20:11

The friend who goes on and on and on about her mental health. She doesn’t stop telling people she’s seeing a counsellor because of her mental health. She can’t make decisions because of her mental health. Life is soooo bad for her because of her mental health. Her relationships are suffering because of her mental health and on and on and on. To anyone who will listen and sometimes to those who don’t. Thing is the only thing wrong with her mental health is the fact that she just wants something to be wrong with it as she enjoys being a victim. I just want to tell her to go and meet someone with real MH problems.

I work with her twin

And her husband

Any tiny slight in life (like having to show up on time to do their jobs/actually do their jobs/their favourite brand of biscuits in the supermarket have sold out/'their' table has someone else sat there/they missed their programme on the tv the night before) results in a shit tonne of moaning and 'but my mental heeeaaalllttthhh!'

Honest to God,she was once asked to hurry up (or rather stop pissing about doing nothing) she flounced out mid shift and came back with a sick note for depression

Cue 8 weeks of both of them off (funnily enough,this was mid summer and the weather was nice) leaving the rest of us to cover their work and they came back,lasted two weeks and both went back off with 'mental health'

This is how it goes with the pair of them-you can time it on the calendar

How they still have jobs,I do not know

She had a baby about 6 months ago (and is finding babies are not the best for mental health) and as soon as she went off on maternity leave,he took the time off too on his own version of mat leave (endless sick notes)

They come in and gloat about the time off that they are enjoying while the rest of us work like dogs

Her brother is exactly the same (he had 7 months off due to his mental health) and her mother is the worst for it (she doesn't work for us but she has collared me outside to moan at me about her mental health more than once)

They need to grow up and spend time with people with real mental health issues to see how lucky they are and to grow up and stop being such lazy twats

They piss me off,I see them walking towards me and I just want to run away

Nearly50omg · 26/08/2025 21:32

NotSmallButFunSize · 26/08/2025 17:27

All my friends won't stop talking about perimenopause - every teeny tiny thing that happens to anyone must be a symptom.....

I am the same age but cannot be arsed to think about it - I think most of us are too young for it to actually be an issue, it's more just that we have busy lives and have hit 40!

I just glaze over the conversation but it's getting really boring

You are an arsehole! Lots of us are soo badly affected by menopause we become suicidal and feel like we’re losing our marbles! Some are lucky to never have any symptoms at all so just be bloody grateful you don’t end up in pain all over, feeling like you’re losing your mind and loads of other health conditions that start up as a consequence of menopause

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 26/08/2025 21:21

How every teeny tiny aliment now must be perimenopause...... no, its JUST A FUCKING HEADACHE!!!!!

GlasgowGal2014 · 26/08/2025 21:20

somethingnewandexciting · 26/08/2025 20:38

The fact I have saved for emergencies (£30k, 2 kids and just me, hardly enough to replace boiler and pay for a 2nd hand car) means I can't get Child Benefit, even though I am a single parent. Feckless relatives who never bothered to save earn 70k and get child benefit because of tax loopholes and get to go on lavish holidays. Pisses me off as they laugh about it being free money and how they "deserve" it.
I know it's not popular opinion but I really resent that because I planned for a rainy day I don't get decades of support like they do.

Having savings doesn't rule you out of receiving child benefit. The child element of UC, yes, but not child benefit itself. And it sounds like that's what your relatives are getting too. It used to be universal but now it tapers off if someone in the household earns more than £60K, but as you suggest you can get round that by putting more into pensions etc.

Spottydogtoo · 26/08/2025 21:18

A relative of who comes up with every excuse going for being morbidly obese, big bones, problem with her metabolism, says she has tried every diet going and they don’t work for her. The diets do work whilst she is actually doing them. Has on average at least one coffee and cake out every day with no thought to calories whatsoever. It affects her life so much and what she can do, she just doesn’t want to make a change enough. Has a fairly good job in healthcare but cannot understand or want to listen to anyone trying to explain it comes down to calories in vs calories out. Now taking a weight loss drug, still not losing the weight because what she does eat is absolute sugary junk, think a tub of ice cream for dinner and still consuming a ridiculous number of calories a day. Infuriating.

Grandparents who act like the devoted grandparents to their friends and online yet in reality live 10 drive mins away and have never show any interest in seeing their grandchildren.

People who try to keep up appearances, everyone else has a dog and they feel left out so get a dog so they can post online about it and be in the dog club. Reality is they don’t walk the poor dog and it’s just a trophy dog.

I could go on for hours!