I've just seen the most depressing thing

It was the complete lack of interaction. The parents paid no attention whatsoever to the child. Completely different to be looking at a book together, completely different to be looking at something on the phone together and talking.

And wouldn't your kids just want to be at home sometimes instead of being dashed about every weekend? Downtime is just as important.

Why do you feel the need to have them being 'busy' all the time?
Why can't they be bored and just spend time at home?

but if they all had a book you would be ok with that?

Old people see " a phone" ,we see "a camera, a calendar, work emails, school information, clubs information, appointments, holidays booking, communication with friends, food shop and the list goes on..."
Kids check their merits, homework, teachers comments of the day on their phone, team selection for the match tomorrow..

I fight very hard against "shorts" and more than 5mn against short videos because they are damaging. but a phone is a tool. We have a small tool in our pockets instead of lugging multiple things, books, diary, calendar..

what a child needs, is a parent that shuts up for 10mn once in a while, not keeps yapping nonsense all day to show the world how great they are.

Honestly, just.. shut up and be quiet. It's exhausting for anyone, even a child, when a parent can't stop talking.

I second that! I feel sorry for the daughter having to grow up with a overbearing busybody superior mum like that.

Honestly, people can fuck off. We are very very rarely home, kids need activities and be busy, but If I spend my days entertaining my kids, taking them everywhere, and I plonk them in front of a screen when I sit down and have my coffee in peace for 1 hour in the middle of a busy day, it's my choice.

With my "poor parenting choices" my kids are all top of the class, in the higher sets, spend all their weekends in sports competitions, and have more friends that I have time to accept invitations from. Even I am surprised how bright they are 😂

So honestly, fuck off. I am a better mum because I have my coffee in peace, and no one needs yet another performance parent in a coffee shop showing off to people who couldn't care less what amazing parent they are 😂

I just don’t know what you want us to say. Poor child? Poor child. Shit Dad? Shit Dad.

you don’t know these people.

you only have to look around and see that women are the worst offenders for being ion their phones and ignoring their children!

Funny, I've seen the opposite

It is sad, I think some people are so addicted to their phones that they don’t even realise how much of their lives it is taking up and how much they are missing out on and they are raising a generation to do exactly the same

We went out for lunch on Friday, a young couple sat at the adjacent table with their about 2 year old. They put a phone in front of him (with audio - lovely) and the two of them huddled around another phone. No one spoke. Yes, I judged. It was a truly depressing sight.

But he has her once a week. What is he "getting through"?

Or maybe she'll remove you

That’s not what was said. She said ‘she’d be removing it’ …that’s not her right. (Also not polite or gentle)

Why tho? Not your child is it?

As a few other posters have said, it’s a tiny snapshot of their lives and his parenting. There’s no way you can tell what kind of parent he is from this. It’s also not for you to judge. There’s already way too much judgement of other parents. You can’t do anything as a parent nowadays without being judged. Most parents are just doing to best they can. Save your judgement for parents who deserve it - those that are abusive, genuinely neglectful, critical, unloving. And those where you know the full story. I’m a single parent and it’s HARD. I give my young DD her iPad to watch for half an hour when I need to do something like make a doctor’s appointment, contact a plumber cos the toilet’s broken or whatever. Maybe that might be in a cafe one day. The rest of the day I’m playing with her, cooking for her, painting with her etc. it’s sad to think a stranger would judge me because they happened to see that half hour of our day. Parents need time to do the things they need to do in order to keep their family’s life functioning and they also need a bit of downtime in the day too. They shouldn’t be made to feel guilty for not being their child’s sole focus 100% of the time

Maybe he new you was watching him and judging so he played along to give you something to post about.

Ive done it to people myself i just no they are judging me so i go all out with the show.

And then everyone comes along and moans on here about how they don’t have a ‘village and that no one will help them look after their child…… oh and safeguarding is everyone’s business…
And we wonder at my school why such a high percentage of kids are coming in with serious speech delay. Increased exponentially in the 20 years I’ve been working.
If my DD is making very poor parenting choices that I think would be detrimental to a grandchild the I’m going to be telling her that. Politely. And with care.

I see this most days when I'm walking my dogs. It's really sad

And if I was your daughter and you undermined my parenting, I’d tell you to fuck off!

My daughter is obsessed with a little Japanese girl singing Old Macdonald in Japanese on Instagram. Sometimes I let her watch it as a treat/bribe.

I can’t get incensed about the guy you saw. We do what we do to get through.

My children are adults. When they were young people were starting to have those portable dvd players in cars and it was the rise of gadgets being used at restaurant tables.

My husband and I never used any of those things for our children. Personally I can’t think of anything worse than children being given a screen to entertain themselves.

My ‘defence’ of the man was merely pointing out that it may not be something he does regularly and the fact that the poster seemed to be singling out a man when you only have to look around and see that women are the worst offenders for being ion their phones and ignoring their children!

I hope your adult daughter told you to stop being so ridiculously overbearing.

You’d be okay with her doing so for 12 hours a day in private? Honestly, daft comment, and it’s none of your business anyway. I, btw, hate screens for kids and have 5 granddaughters I’d like to surgically remove from their devices, but they aren’t my kids so it’s not my call.

OP, it’s hard to know whether you’re right, there are, as others have said, too many variables (even Insta might be her siblings or grandparents doing something of interest).

I agree with you 100%.
I am surprised that so many people are rushing to defend this lazy, crappy parenting. I don’t care if it’s a ‘snapshot’ If that’s the only time he’s spending with his child he needs to try harder.