To be fascinated by tidy people

I will caveat my tidiness in the kitchen though as we are in drought and our reservoirs are only 40% full and we need to conserve water, so I don't wash up as I go along, but do a load when there is enough. There is currently just me at the moment so I don't create much mess. I have just washed up last night's meal plus today's breakfast.

Me too.

In the interests of scientific research I have just vacuumed my stairs and ground floor - medium sized 4 bed house (conservatory, living room, hall dining room and kitchen). It took less than 20 minutes because I have nothing on the floors that shouldn't be there.

Admittedly, I didn't move the settees this time, but the carper under the settees does get vaccuumed most of the time. I found having a cordless vacuum a game changer (ditto for lawnmower as well).

I realise that with two toddlers the OP has more to do than I do, but it still sounds too chaotic with too much stuff and not enough storage.

@tangerinemagic I'm also curious as to why 3 prams?

you have too much stuff and things don’t have a storage space.

3 prams - you and husband can only push two max surely? So why 3?
bags - hang on hook or similar. In our hall we have a kallax or similar with a box per person so kids chuck shoes in there when they get home (youngest is 20 months and knows where they go, albeit inconsistent but he’s nearly there!) Toddlers helmet is also in his, nappy bag in 20mo. The struggle for me is keeping the top clear 😂

do you NEED to sort the clothes? If it’s sort to sell/donate then just donate or recycle and be done. Take it when you next do a shop and find a recycling point en route. The space is more valuable to your comfort than 3 quid off Vinted or whatever. if it’s sort to store for a future baby then take ten minutes to flick for anything damaged or stained, stash in a box where you keep that stuff.

It has made me much able to be ruthless with mess.

You were asking for the ‘it’s because I’m not lazy and I’m self-disciplined’ brigade to come out on this one! Lots of extremely tidy people I know - the ones who live in show homes are very anxious and unhappy women so I agree with PP on that. Clutter or untidiness makes me anxious too so I tend to own as little as possible and throw out as much as possible. Don’t think you’ll sell - you won’t and it you did the money you get won’t be worth the stress. Box it all up and give it to the charity shop. Be ruthless. Also, have you considered that you may have ADHD; it’s really sounds to me like you might.

I think expecting to feel recharged seems the most unrealistic part of what I’m hearing. When the kids are teens that might occasionally be possible. In the meantime just expect to be knackered. But from 2 onwards no one walks away from their mess.

No tidy people just complete the task fully

Make tea -leave tea, milk out on worktop
Make tea, put tea and milk back

I don't have to consciously tidy, it's always tidy
Makes cleaning so much easier.

I have a robot vacuum and the amount of threads where people say they hate theirs as it got stuck on things on the floor, I mean really !?
Do people just leave stuff chucked all over the floor and vacuum over it

@Cliffedge25 that sounds awful
I would actually do it
I'm sure many marriages break up because of filthy men

It sounds to me like you are just bursting out of your home. It's very hard when you have small children. When mine were little I remember getting a bit overwhelmed by all the stuff thet was coming and going, they grew out of clothes, people gave me huge bags of hand me downs etc. I felt like I was constantly organising clothes, craft toys etc. I too grew up in a chaotic home so had no role model. Don't beat yourself up so much.

Some things which I found helpful. Have a dedicated memory box on the loft and put the most special item in it but everything else e.g. paintings which come home from nursery get a week or two on the pin board or fridge before they go in the bin.

Dedicated coat hooks for swim bags / school bags etc so the wet swim suits go straight into the machine and the bag is hung up.

I swapped my winter and summer wardrobe over to reduce the clothes / choices / clutter. Stored the out of season stuff in vaccum bags in the loft.
Toys got chucked into boxes and shoved in an IKEA kallax at the end of every day.

Cleaned the high chairs with a wipe while the baby was still in it.

Challenged myself to tackle one thing I was procrastinating over each day....go and throw everything off your old sofa and list it right now.
I had a basket in the airing cupboard for charity shop clothes and took them to the clothing bins at the supermarket.

When you have 90 mins while they are napping challenge yourself to tidy the hallway first for 10 or 15 mins, or unloading the dishwasher for 5 mins first.

It's not a case of tidying all day long but just building in some tidy habits and reducing the procrastination, you won't have everything tidy all the time with kids that age so don't avoid the task because it feels too big....do little bits at a time. In terms of bathroom the bathroom day to day I keep a spray and sponge in there and do the sink when I clean my teeth, or give the mirror a wipe when I do my make up, and (much to the horror of mumsnet I am sure) keep a toilet brush and cleaner next to the loo so give it a swill once a day. We use the daily shower spray after showering. It stays pretty clean. I used to clean the bath before I ran one for the kids each night.

@NamechangeNightNurse Also, my point wasn't really whether I do those things immediately or not, but that once they are done there will still be more. There is literally always something. Hence me saying truly tidy people don't ever sit down during the day, except maybe to eat. Also the example with taking the tea cup with you when you're getting up anyway: the tidy people I know would finish the last mouthful of tea then get up specifically to take the cup away and put it in the dishwasher or immediately wash it!

It categorically is not what you need to do to have a tidy house. That’s my idea of eternal hell!

Signed,
An extremely lazy tidy person x

Your distinction sums it up perfectly. I’m a tidy person, rather than someone who always tidies up.

I have a friend who lives in perpetual chaos and spends so much bloody time tidying up and yet nothing is ever tidy. She marvels at how my house remains tidy and is forever asking “how do you do it?” The clutter and stuff she owns is unreal to me. I think neither of us can understand how the other one lives.

@OlympicProcrastinator do you never leave your bed to air with the windows open before making it? You should.

Could be that they are all just tidy people. Could also be that one of the parents is abusive and they get punished if they leave anything out. That was the case for one of my classmates.

Daily small maintenance cleans e.g 20-30 minutes, plus a bigger/deeper clean of a couple of hours at the weekend.

I also ‘tidy as I go’ and am training the DC to do the same. Thus before leaving a room, do a quick scan to see if something needs to be picked up and moved. For example, a cup or dirty socks - bring them downstairs and put them in dishwasher/washing basket. This prevents a build up.

You will also never see me watching tv with a pile of dirty plates and pots piled around the kitchen. DH and I will always clear stuff away before we relax.

Ffs my entire post got cut off. In a nutshell if you and your family walk in and put coats on a peg, shoes on a rack rather than elsewhere and then have to tidy it layer, or you make your bed as soon as you get out of it, or hang towels up and put lids on shampoos and place them nearly after you use them etc etc, you aren’t ever ‘tidying’ you are ‘being tidy’.

Its a way of living instilled as a child not an additional chore.

Yes this. I have never understood how things get untidy. I was raised in a very tidy house and my house is always very tidy

It takes no time at all if the house is already tidy and you don't make a mess in the first place. Unlike a pp it doesn't take me an hour just to clean one room either. Just how dirty can a room be that it takes an hour to clean?

This! Messy people have to have way less stuff than they think they need in order to be tidy. I’m a messy person who’s now tidy - it’s all about having less stuff.

I do think some people tidy all the time. It's what you have to do to have a tidy house.

When do they do other things?? 🤔 How do they have time??

My parents house is immaculate, and I do think in some ways I am rebelling (aged 43 🙄) against this

I’m a bit of a ruthless declutterer. A true follower of KonMari. I try to never leave a room empty handed and I clean one room a day for about an hour. That way the house gets cleaned every week but it doesn’t feel like a huge task. I’m pretty regimented about the dishwasher and laundry. I put them on before bed and unload them when the kettle is boiling for tea in the morning … I think being tidy is about creating good routines.

My house is clean it’s just not tidy

100% it isn't clean.
You can't clean properly round clutter and mess and stuff just chucked everywhere.
I mean, how could you even hoover?
Let's be real here.

I mean this kindly, you need to clear the clutter if the DC can't have pals around unexpectedly.
It has a massive impact on their confidence. I hated living in a cluttered house, it was embarrassing and brought shame, once we were teenagers we took over.
As a younger DC I was amazed by friends with clean homes, I always felt sad coming back to piles of crap.
I understand DM was overwhelmed now I'm an adult.

@Lucyccfc68 Same here. I always tidy up before going to bed. I also Never leave a room without taking something with me. 🤣